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-   -   just how do you move on? (https://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/showthread.php?t=28921)

plymgal 13-01-2012 09:20 PM

just how do you move on?
 
my son died 10 years ago very suddenly , and i am still stuck the world has moved on10 years and im still there stuck in the past if i allow my self to stop and think of him i can get overwhelmed and panicky, so i try not to ,i wish i could enjoy my life more, i never sit in silence i have to have tv radio or computer on from morning to night i find the quiet uncomfortable i dont know why .

WhiteWarrior 13-01-2012 09:21 PM

Does it help to know that his spirit still lives, and that he most likely has already reincarnated?

Shabby 13-01-2012 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by plymgal
my son died 10 years ago very suddenly , and i am still stuck the world has moved on10 years and im still there stuck in the past if i allow my self to stop and think of him i can get overwhelmed and panicky, so i try not to ,i wish i could enjoy my life more, i never sit in silence i have to have tv radio or computer on from morning to night i find the quiet uncomfortable i dont know why .


Plymgal, welcome to the forum. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. To loose a child is by far the worst thing I could imagine to experience. I understand that you are having a hard time moving on. Who wouldn't? I am happy that you have found this forum. Look around here, there are great threads with great insights from truly gifted and compassionate members that might open you to a new perspective on life.

Silver 13-01-2012 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by plymgal
my son died 10 years ago very suddenly , and i am still stuck the world has moved on10 years and im still there stuck in the past if i allow my self to stop and think of him i can get overwhelmed and panicky, so i try not to ,i wish i could enjoy my life more, i never sit in silence i have to have tv radio or computer on from morning to night i find the quiet uncomfortable i dont know why .


I lost my almost 23-yr-old son 2 yrs. ago, so I know about what you've gone through. It was sudden for him, too. I get stomach aches at night, I'm sure part of which is being without him, y'know how we have all that empty space in our minds and hearts when we tuck ourselves in free to think about whatever lands. It's very hard. After about the first year, I fought with myself and talked to myself, to get tougher about it (and yet gentle to myself at the same time!) and told myself repeatedly that if I believe he is a spirit and I believe yes that he has visited in different ways (a few dreams, signs and just 'feeling his presence', then he is truly 'alive' somehow and that he is now a part of the invisible spectators in our lives who are rooting for us...to have as good a life as possible with as much joy, love, and all that other stuff as we can manage. I will always cry when I think of him, although it has gotten milder many of the times I think of him. It takes a certain amount of time in which to mellow after such a loss.
:hug:

liberation 13-01-2012 10:21 PM

Hi Plygmgal,
Though it happened 10 years ago it still feels like it happened yesterday. I know how you feel. Try to meditate as if you are holding your sons hand and cross the white light leaving your son behind and come back to our world. He is happy on the the other world and he wants you to be happy as well. Saying to move on may be easy but its really hard to put into practice. God bless you dear.
Regards.

Enya 13-01-2012 10:40 PM

No one can really tell you how to move on... the pain will always be there but it does fade. What I'd suggest is getting some support to help you face the panic feelings (a form of grief) so you can start to heal. There's the obvious systems of bereavement counselling and specialist groups who understand the loss of a child, but there are also gentle methods such as Reiki healing, where an experienced practitioner will help you release the blocks holding you back. If you can, send a wee thought to your son to help you heal and I'm sure he will do whatever he can from his side. :hug2:

oliviasang 13-01-2012 10:43 PM

As inadequate as it is I am very sorry for your loss.

You are taking a great step by just seeing that time has moved on and an even greater step by wanting to find enjoyment. Have you attended grief counseling? I really think it could help, no one could do this alone.

I will never forget a psy class I was in several years ago; we went over the stages of grief and how long a normal mourning period was. We went through various family members and friends. Then we got to the loss of a child, my professor dramatically went to the board and erased everything as she said. "There is NO normal mourning time period for the loss of a child, there is no stages of grief because a parent will forever mourn their child, whether their child was an infant or a 40 year old.

As I'm sure you know, you will never stop mourning and that's ok, you just have to now learn how to live and still find enjoyment in life. You seem like a very strong person and I have faith you can do this.

Olivia

mac 14-01-2012 01:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WhiteWarrior
Does it help to know that his spirit still lives, and that he most likely has already reincarnated?


"already reincarnated" nonsense!

plymgal 15-01-2012 08:52 PM

thanks for all your replies feeling much better today:smile:

Native spirit 15-01-2012 10:37 PM

:hug: Lossing anyone is hard but to loose a child unbearable, your pain will ease overtime it will never go but it will become easier,,
your son is happy now and comes around you berevement councelling will help you and their is no time limit for it to ease.so you can see a councellor as soon as you feel ready.


Namaste


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