Eyes window to the soul?
 

Ever since i was around 12 i started having problems making eye contact with people. It got so bad that it affected my social life greatly, lost friends because i was so scared to interact. My eyes actually look crazy sometimes because of the nerves i get from looking people in their eyes. Could the reason be because of horrible things i done in the past life and my soul is tainted? I have suffered a lot already in my life and i'm only 21 but i have also learned a lot too.

It depends on your thoughts regarding past lives and if you think struggling to make eye contact is down to a tainted soul.

Me personally, I think it's down to lack of confidence and self esteem.

You're 21 - and I don't mean this to be patronising - but when I was the same age I struggled to make eye contact, and did do throughout my life from a child just like you.

Now eye contact is very important to me and quite special. It aids confidence and self esteem looking into someone's eyes. It is also a very beautiful thing to do, too, and not necessarily in a romantic way.

Start pushing yourself to make eye contact, but start slowly, 10 seconds at a time if need be and build up.

Looking into your own eyes in the mirror is a brilliant practice, too. Tell yourself you accept yourself. This will improve self esteem and confidence.

It's not pleasant, but feel the fear and do it anyway!

Maybe it is more that you are highly sensitive to others emotions, and connecting to them through their eyes simply feels too intense. Maybe you are just very intelligent wired with great abilities you need to get more comfortable with. Maybe start with someone you trust deeply :smile:

I agree. Healing is facing the unwanted emotions.

Although, I'm not as quick to diagnose something as low self-esteem, it is a common struggle some of us deal with.

For me, personally, I've wondered if I struggle making eye contact also because I'm a sensitive person and can't handle the level of felt intimacy that connection embraces. If this sound familiar, look into Highly Sensitive People.

It's funny that you guys mention that it might be because i'm very sensitive to other peoples emotions because just recently i've been researching HSP (highly sensitive people) and believe i am a HSP. I do also suffer from low self esteem too. I feel like people looking into my eyes can see all the bad things i've done in my life through them because i have made mistakes in my life and hurt people.

If you let go of the clouds of despair, a sun instead will shine out through your very being, and all people will see is how lovely, kind and beautiful you are. So maybe play with keeping your attention in your heart space, and fill it with the love for how amazing you are, allowing everything else to gently dissolve in the pace it need to :smile:

Yeah, what he/she said!

Thank you guys. And that was beautiful wording

I would have kept trying but people started turning their face away...

so I just live without :icon_eek:

I am actually very much the same way with making eye contact and looking people in the eyes.

In my case however I am well aware of my reasons and that I have these reasons due to this lifetime and what I have learned from this lifetime incarnation.

First my only reason for normally being very anxious with making eye contact with others- and for me the emotion is indeed extreme anxiety- is simple. And it is that I have noticed with the vast majority of people- I don't actually like what I see there. Neither do I respect it, neither will I take it on and own it in any way shape or form. What I see I also have simply given up trying to explain. Knowing full well most will not even understand.

That is my reason, and I full well know by experience it has nothing to do with my past lives. The life I see what is truly present behind the eyes of most- is in fact this one.

I stopped even trying to hope to find a light within most years ago.

I do make direct eye contact sparingly. I find when I do this I am no longer anxious at all. I usually do this making direct eye contact business only when I am in a position of trying out a power play, or that is to say in a situation that calls for seriousness and respect to look into anothers eyes, or in other words, in important social circumstances where it is expected- like when I will speak with a doctor, or an officer or another such figure in social standing, and not so much as a sign of respect but more I wish to be taken seriously by the individual and if we are discussing something to show they have my attention and I am listening.

It is very much the same when I sparingly make eye contact for the next reason which is- when I am talking with someone I know quite well and we have actually spoken before, or are quite friendly already, or in the rare case it is a stranger whom poses no immediate threat and I can tell and feel already that it is alright to look into their eyes they are prone to have friendliness in them.

So I make eye contact when listening to someone in an important conversation I am usually forced into as it is a health concern and I am either talking to a professional- doctor- or an authority figure- the law.

Other than that my eye contact is for those I actually truly respect.

For the common unknown masses- I have seen most of what is there already. They are strangers, I am not here to placate them, I for the most part make it through my day avoiding dealing with those I do not know. I respect them in so far as I do not antagonize them, I do not patronize them, and I do not ask them for anything. I move through my life for the most part paying them as little mind as possible and praying too, they do not take any notice to me.

When I go out and public I behave politely and with respect, I will hold the door at the store, or whatever building I am at for others. But when others start to think that door is an invitation to try to know anything about me at all, or an invitation at all for abuse- I slam it shut cold. And I am well aware enough of the general intent of others long before they realize I was ever aware of it at all.

For while I usually avoid dead on eye contact- that actually doesn't mean I don't look. And I always look. To make sure I know exactly what it is I am looking at.

I have seen the cold, the hate, in the eyes of others. I being female have also seen what a predator looks like, and have enough experience with harassment of all types to know exactly that they actually have a tell tale look in the eyes.

I can not tell you if what you are experiencing could be past life related or not, I do not know what your reasons are for whom you look at and for how long, and why.

I only know of my own for certain.

I also have considered that old adage to perhaps be true- The eyes are the windows to the soul.

I have considered that. By the majority of what I see, I want nothing to do with it...