I'm not sure if I was meant to be a boy or a girl
 

I've been thinking lately. It's not that I hate being a boy. Well I used to, for awhile, then things sorta changed around 2010-2015. But I think I was maybe meant to be a girl. Another possibility is that I was meant to have a twin sister. Now, I'm all talk about wanting to redo this life all over again, but instead I want to be reborn as my twin sister. I don't actually have a twin sister, but I do have a sister who's 2 years older than me. I'm also in great fear about my next life, taking place in the 22nd century and I'm 100% against that! Sure, I can't predict the future but there's no way I'm going to live in some high class "Blade Runner/Jetsons" society. Advanced technology scares me more than it used to excite me. I just wanna be honest, for the longest time, there was just something off about my gender and it's not because I have Autism or anything. I just feel I might have made a mistake and there's only one way to disprove that; it's my TV show idea for Hollywood. Yeah I know it sounds crazy, but I feel this is the only way to know if I was truly meant to be a boy or not.

It does not matter whether you are a boy or girl, what matters is that you love yourself unconditionaly. I wouldn't worry about the next life if I were you instead I would concentrate on evolving as much as I can in this lifetime.

How do you know you'll incarnate again in 100 years? Let alone that you'll incarnate in this same physical plane with its same history? Haven't you heard of parallel universes for example? One's current incarnation and life is way to short and beautiful to be wasting it on fearful suppositions about some imagined future reality, one that we can't possibly know the first thing about.

As for the boy/girl thing: You were born, and you are what you are. If you're a boy and you feel like a girl, live your life in ways that make you feel like a girl. And vice versa. The point again: stop thinking and worrying, and get on with living and enjoying your current life as it is now.

I'll start by saying that the following is just my view.. or opinion. It may help you understand what's going on, but if what I'm saying doesn't mesh with your 'world view', feel free to ignore it and move on.

Each person is born into the world with the most ideal circumstances needed for each person's spiritual progress. If you were born a boy, you are meant to be a boy. You may have more feminine energy than most males, but this doesn't mean that you should have been a girl.

Most often, and this is happening more as humanity progresses spiritually, the lines that connect our lives to our higher self get somewhat 'crossed'. By this I mean, that your higher self has awareness of each of your lives simultaneously. There are times when some energies, memories, thoughts, or emotions from other lives leak into this one. This can create something of an identity crisis. You take on aspects of those other lives and they start to interfere with what you should be doing now.

This may be why you're having this dual 'female / twin' idea which could be aspects of another life you have; which also may be the one you are talking about in the future (and why there's such a high level of fear involved - because there is some level of awareness of what's happening in that life).

Try doing a meditation where you clear out your chakras, stabalise your aura/energy field, and reconnect properly with your own body. You may be having these experiences as a direct result of not liking your physical body in the past; you've essentially rejected it, causing an imbalance in your subtle bodies, partly disconnecting you from your current life, and allowing information from other lives to come in.

And if you've made it this far... I'll repeat that this may be completely wrong because it's a best-guess as to what could be going on based on how I understand things to work (in relation to what you've described).

I've actually had thoughts about how I actually may have almost been born female, considering the amount of female energy I seem to possess, such as empathy, spirituality and generally feeling more feminine. But it doesn't really matter whether or not I'm able to give birth so :tongue: