My thoughts go out to you Purple Mist.

Please understand no matter what others may tell you, it will take you significant time to even begin to come to terms with your loss; Im talking years not months. Allow yourself this time, do not feel pressure and grieve as feels right to you. Some say 5 years, some say 7 years. I guess we are al different, I am a year on from losing my mother, would have been the funeral this Thursday a year ago and it doesn't feel ANY better. There is still a Black Hole literally. Lost my dad 34 years ago to the same horrible illness as you lost your dad too

Understand that there will be folk who just don't empathise having never been through it and don't let the ignorant impede in your grieving process one bit. If it take you 10 years to come through to the other side then SO be it!

We are all here on this site for you and to offer support and condolences.

That is truly an inspirational post, my friend:biggrin: :biggrin:

PurpleMist - I am wishing you and your family much love and many blessings at this time. May your memories of your father and the love you shared be a comfort to you now and always.

Peace & blessings,
7L

That is kind of you, wolfgaze. Thank you.

This may be hard to understand, PurpleMist...but, this is the most precious gift
your father has ever given you.
You will reach depths you have never known.
:love9:

I think at this present moment, everything in my life is hard to understand, but I think I can see what you're saying Miss Hepburn. I am very lucky to have had such a wonderful man as my Dad, I'm just missing him terribly at the moment, I just want to hear his voice down the phone or hug him.

I know it sounds selfish, because I'm thinking of me, and I would never have wanted my Dad to suffer and his suffering was short thank goodness, so he was blessed in that sense. This is so hard. I'm actually a trained bereavement counsellor, but I'm not practising at the moment, so I understand the theory behind grief and I know every grief is completely different, but I just can't go on without him. My partner is devastated too as she was very fond of my Dad and he was of her too. I just want to wake up and this last month hav all been a bad dream...

PurpleMist I think how you're feeling is natural and understandable. Others have been right there too and can empathize with how you're feeling right now. I know it's not easy to feel this way but you just have to allow the hurting to be present and then you work your way through it over time. No matter how much it hurts you will not be stuck feeling this way - so just try to reassure and remind yourself that you are going to feel better over time - and you will!

I noticed in your profile that you mention that you have a child (daughter). Perhaps at some point moving forward it would be helpful and beneficial for your healing process for you to focus on the realization that you can give to your child what your father gave to you. You can
be for your child what your father was (and is) for you. The positive influence and love that he extended to you - you can pass it on to your daughter. It's the gift that keeps on giving, and oh what a nice gift. Maybe even someday your daughter will start her own family and be able to pass on the loving influence that was passed on down from your father, through you, and onto her. A multi-generational ripple effect of you and your loved ones uplifting and elevating one another. : )

I think it's interesting that you already have bereavement counseling training. I think you are going to find that enduring through this challenging experience of grieving your father's passing is going to serve to change you in ways that will impart a new level of awareness, understanding, and insight with regards to the nature of the grieving process. Perhaps this experience will end up providing you with an even better equiped skillset with which you can utilize to aid and assist others who find themselves grieving the passing of their loved ones. It could feel like your 'calling' and something which is not only extremely important, but also very rewarding/fulfilling. Just a thought....

~WOLF

Tomorrow is my dads funeral. I'm not ready for it. It's too fast. I feel him around me in spirit and have asked for him to send a sign just for me tomorrow, just to let me know he's there with us.

I'm totally heartbroken, I feel as if I'm still in some awful dream, my Dad can't have left the physical world? I don't want to go on without him, I miss his kind words, strength and guidance so much.

Hello, dear PurpleMist.

I cannot tell you how sorry I am to hear about your loss.

If this helps, at least he obtained the relief from physical pain he so desperately sought, and he is in a beautiful place now.

You were a wonderful daughter to him, and he was lucky to have you.

God bless you and your family :hug:

What a thoughtful and inspiring post, wolfgaze !!! Thanks so much for sharing, friend ! :hug2: