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Hemera 16-01-2024 06:13 PM

Living alone
 
Do you love it? Hate it? Why/why not?

I love alone and absolutely love it. It can get lonely, especially in the evenings, but when I think about what I've gained, I feel really blessed. However I know it's different for everyone. I'm an introvert who loves my own space. I also had very many years bringing up a disabled child, so I'm thankful for my peace now. I cherish animal company but like to pick and chose when I see or speak to humans. I guess the flipside is I'm not very compromising. I'm too used to my own way of doing things. When I see my male 'companion' I realise how set in my ways i've become through so many years of being single and living alone.

Bluto 16-01-2024 07:23 PM

I live alone, and have done my whole adult life. The thought of living with someone else is my worst nightmare. I can please myself the whole time living alone, which is priceless. I LOVE living alone.

Native spirit 16-01-2024 08:12 PM

I don't live alone but I do like my own space.

I like being on my own at times to.


Namaste

FallingLeaves 16-01-2024 08:17 PM

i live alone too... i 'get' that it is much easier to do as one pleases when one pleases, and not having to sit around compromising all the time is kind of heavenly.... not that I mind doing as the other person chooses just the way that always works for me everything is ALWAYS about what the other person chooses when they choose it and for example one thing that can happen is they get very demanding and I never get to rest. For you see im not allowed to have boundaries; me speaking up for myself is always cause for a relationship to end.

So yeah any more im getting used to the idea that maybe it is more natural for someone like me to be living alone anyway lol...

Any more I don't *feel* alone though.

Redchic12 17-01-2024 05:01 AM

HemerA. Yes I feel the same as you. I love it! I feel it’s a real privilege to have my own home and choose every day to do what I want to do. Wish ide done it years earlier.

AngelBlue 17-01-2024 08:27 AM

Quite happy to live alone as I have done , on and off for many years.
Having my kids and your own life is on "hold " somewhat but I wouldn't have changed that for anything. I love them.
But something quite exhilarating in just doing what you want each day.
I'm married now, and all the offspring have flown the nest. But even though I've got hubby here I am very much alone as he works long hours and at best I see him maybe 10 mins a day.

Altair 17-01-2024 11:14 AM

I'm a hardcore introvert. I really need hours to myself and not have distraction from others. There are days where I'm in the office and then next up is something in the evening where I'm around many people. Days like that are exhausting to me and my sleep suffers from it, so I have to manage such days carefully and make sure I don't need to start early again the next day. I really need to go home and watch and listen to something relaxing for a couple of hours.

Because of my personality I don't think I'd be a fit for anyone really. The only people who can take me as I am without judgement are my parents. Colleagues, peers, and no doubt potential partners are (or will be) judgemental towards me because I'm not the outgoing, extroverted man that is all chitty chatty smiley smiles that society wants me to be.

It doesn't mean I hate company, but the company I'm around needs to be a fit, and I'm so specialized in this that I don't think there will be fitting company to live with. Most people aren't like me, they wanna get out every evening, they wanna chat all day etc. If I had to live with someone like that I'd probably develop serious health issues over time.

Hemera 17-01-2024 02:07 PM

Bluto - I completely get it. I lived with then-husband for six years, but since we broke up nearly two decades ago I've lived completely alone and I can't imagine living with someone again now.

Native Spirit - I very much need my own space too.

FallingLeaves - I am also the kind of person to tries to fit in with others and never end up really doing what's right for me. I don't have the best boundaries either. Living alone solves that problem too!

Redchic - yes it does feel a privilege. I feel at peace in my own space.

Angelblue - it is comforting I imagine to know you've done your bit for your children and now it's you and hubby and you have lots of time to yourself!

Altair - I very much relate. Hard core introvert with health issues and low energy levels here. Even going into town exhausts me. I've reached the conclusion I can't offer anyone a long term relationship. I do have a male companion but he has his issues too and we meet up as and when we want without any pressure. It means I get a bit of the physical side as well as a companion, but to be honest I'd rather be on my own most of the time, reading, writing and meditating. Most people aren't like that.

Aldous 17-01-2024 03:21 PM

I lived alone ever since my father died from lung cancer in 1999. I'm still living at home, but I'm the only one left. I've lived here since 1961.

ameliorate 17-01-2024 04:01 PM

I choose to live alone and enjoy solitude. It seems to take a certain personality type - maybe a creative/self sufficient one that doesn't easily get bored - to see the benefits of this lifestyle choice.

Whilst this may attract introverts more, I seem to have the ability to go from one extreme to the other, i.e. also be the 'life and soul of the party'! Not boasting - being factual.

There's living alone and then there's being a semi-recluse. I am the latter, by choice.

Being with people can often drain me since I'm an empath. I seem to need more 'space'/freedom than the average person i.e. can go weeks without talking to anyone without feeling the need to do so.


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