I need some help, anyone welcome!
 

So I have really started developing lately. It started when I was young, as long as I can remember. But this past year has been crazy, I seem to be a magnet for odd things. I went through a long while of forgetting everything. But now I need to discover everything. It all started picking up just before September, when I cleansed my friends house with a black amethyst that I've owned forever. No one knows where I got it, not even I. But we broke it after it stopped holding light, after that a series of odd events came to pass, the biggest thing is being able to manipulate wind when I focus hard enough. I've met people who aren't skeptical now because of me. Anyone who's open to help me out post on here, ill explain more if people will help me.

What is it you're wanting to know exactly?

Well I'm actually just stuck at this point in time need more people thinking about it, recently I've been hearing loud bangs, ones that shake the house, my things go missing then later reappear. One of the biggest things was finding a joker card from a deck that doesn't have a print date. I only found it because I was curious of one space in my house. When I was going to give up I heard scratching in the area, so I pried the boards off, I found it there. Ever since the card has been messing with my head. Like disappeared then ended up in my locker in school standing at exactly 90 degrees. I also used to get vivid dreams of a girl with long black hair. I never told people. Then one day my ex said she saw a girl with long black hair in my room. Kinda spooked me. Anyone have thoughts of why its around me or what it is?

I realize i have no knowledge of things that have been happening my whole life. I feel that I may be able to get better with knowledge. By the way, ignoring it made everything way worse so please no recommendations like that

If no one here can or wants to help that is fine as well, I've already had many wickens and mediums abandon me

that must be disconcerting, Kaletheold, have you tried getting input from a close friend?

Yes I have, and they all just dont know how to help me out..

if I were you I would confide in a family member or school counselor, they often can see possibilities where we can not, and that's what they are there for.
Allow them to help you to make sense of things.

You think I'm crazy, cool. Thank you so much forum. Have a good life. When the worst possible things happen I will be laughing as you all go through the agony I have.

A very warm welcome to the forum.

Sorry if you feel the forum has let you down. Very early days yet. Don't be too hasty.
You could try your luck in the psychic phenomenon section. Someone might have been through something similar and could give you help and advice.

My friend attempted to commit suicide last night, seeing a girl with long black hair. Its already broadening its basis. Admins close my account please and delete my account. Goodbye and good luck to all who saw this. I apologize. If it manifests near you. Email me at
(Edited by SF Staff)

Kale, I am so sorry but it is against the rules of our forum to put up personal identification information on to the forum. That means personal email addresses etc. I am afraid your last post has had to be edited.

If you do seriously wish to close your account, please contact a member of admin. You can tell who is admin if you scroll right down the page to the bottom, and check who (mods and admin) is on duty. You will see mods and admin's names in colours. Admin. are purple. Then PM one of them.

But if you do decide to stay after all, you might find some people do understand the things you are going through. Many people here have had experiences which would be hard to talk about except with those who can understand....

It is in poor taste that a newcomer comes to the board seeking guidance and is made to feel they are crazy.

It looks like you're not crazy, but have a lot of , as some people say, "woo-woo" going on. I've read about the sort of popping/loud bangs experienced by some, never experienced it myself. That is usually accompanied by heat/energy feeling around the solar plexus, if literature I've read is correct.

As for the girl, I've experienced something vaguely similar, however I was aiming to see what an entity looked like, a self-proclaimed "shadow" who followed me. Long story short, I probably jumped into the astral, straight to her, scared her by arriving, and was promptly banished back to my body. This "woman" is not friendly, she tortured me for a period of my life, trying to dominate my psyche. You being stuck might be because you have to overcome an adversary somehow. I know she jumps around and visits other people a lot, maybe she, or someone like her, is visiting you. Its best to not take a paranoid approach, but more standing your ground until you know what you want to do.

as for confiding in others, anyone who will listen, so long as you are being logical in comprehending the events that take place, can provide insight to your situation. It is somewhat dangerous, however, to talk to a councilor or your parents about this sort of thing, depending on how understanding they are on the subjects of the unknown and the workings of the mind. I have been sent to a dirty hospital room for nine and a half hours because I asked someone If they could give me an idea of wether i had something psychological or not. Their answer will usually be yes of course you do in a toned down, sugar coated manner. Most people don't even consider that something outside their worldview could happen, simply because it hasn't been proven. At the same time, confiding in others I could either easily disengage with or trust has earned me a handful of people who helped keep me sane during my darkest times. Reach out and seek progression, you will find it if it is what you truly desire.

As far as I can make out, nobody suggested such a thing in this thread. But Kale, maybe you had some people in life to contend with who were not so understanding, and so maybe you expect similar things here?

I don't think that that is what poor Stargazer meant. To my reading, they were just sensibly suggesting the poster found someone they could talk to and confide in face to face.

Unfortunately councilors won't take this sort of thing lightly, I know from experience. You can be as stable as you like, they tend to freak out and shove you towards someone who will prescribe you meds when they aren't trained to handle schizo. And if they are trained, its a 50/50 wether or not you get the same, or worse, treatment. Most of them are also willing to ignore signs that you don't have it, in favor of saying that you do because you experience one or two symptoms that are big and flashy, like seeing things and believing "weird things". "I can control the wind when I focus" wouldn't sit very well with anyone psych oriented, they would label that a delusion of grandeur, and in a rather unscientific manner, not bother to test if it actually IS or not.

It was a naive suggestion in the first place, one that, if followed, would have probably caused more trouble than it would have solved due to our society's unfortunate perception and general public denial of unusual occurrences. :/

That being what it is, I also hope it was said with good intentions at heart.

I've been locked in a psych ward, the feelings are always cold. And multiple people around me have been hurt. All people I loved once. I have gotten to the point of where I am not willing to open up to anyone. I've had the urge to go to Tibet and have seen ruins of some of the great landmarks of the world shoved together. Lilith is looking for a place of rest in the ruins of desolation. I've decided to use all my strength to keep it near me and avoid one of the most powerful landmarks in the world. Good luck to all in your future endeavors. I was enlightened yesterday, I no longer fear it

The psych ward was because of me getting the sudden urge to commit suicide like my friends have. I took fourth sleeping pills and drank rubbing alcohol and survived for nine hours before my mom got home. They didn't even pump my stomach and were intrigued at how I survived. Still no explanation

I second Tavvin's suggestion to be careful in confiding in folks who are psych oriented. They'll tend to medicate and lock people up for this line of thinking and experiences.

You are not alone in this KaletheOld. I also experience otherworldly things in my life similar to you. However, I learn it's important to cleanse one's aura and keep oneself in high vibration. I utilize the violet flame technique....one that St. Germain gifted to us. I'm not affiliated with any particular religions but the violet flame has been very helpful to me.I can share more if you're interested.

There are a few possibilities...1) could be an entity attaching itself to you, 2) psychic power developing where you're projecting your telekinetic power creating a haunting like scenario (all to do with ones emotions), 3) the breaking of the amethyst (I'm wondering if it was used in magic to hold something in)

What I feel from hearing this is doing a smudging and cleanse of one's surroundings and cleanse of yourself energetically. There are sites out there that have suggestions on how to do it with violet flame. I would also play holy music in the house while I decree the violet flame invocation. Also hold no fear in ones heart. And ask the Universe to send you a supportive person who understands what you're going through spiritually. I am very careful about sharing anything that is out there like this with a counselor.

Like I said I have gone through stuff like this by myself but the Universe always helpful in guiding me to the right source.

how what i communicated could be misconstrued as thinking someone is crazy is beyond me...that will teach me.

Well I've had smudges with blessed white sage in houses before. It makes me sick. Same as sweet grass burning, like I get mad chills then severe nausea. Also me and my friend also considered the stone holding something because the dreams I used to get only happened when i slept near it, we think we let it out after giving it the amount of power from his home. Also I hold no resentment. But when your house is literally making bangs so loud that the house shakes and you tell me to talk to a counselor or person close who have already locked me in a psych ward its not a good thing to hear.

skygazer, people tend to think, at the moment you mention councilor, that you are saying they are crazy. Its just the label society has placed on them, I didn't personally think you were intending that. The main idea around the suggestion, talk to someone to keep stable, is a very good one, one that I fully endorse, but it is something that needs to be handled VERY CAREFULLY as it could potentially turn your life upside down. Nothin personal, it was just slightly shortsighted.

I think Stargazer meant well and with no ill intent. I also second what Tavviin said in regard to suggestion about going to a counselor. Due to your experience it was misconstrued as something else.

Also if smudging make you sick try other methods such as wind chimes, incense, or combo, or one. Follow your intuition.

A counselor can be a spiritual counselor who is adept at these sort of thing. The conventional counselor is trained to see illness if it's out of the realm of their experience. I hope you look into the violet flame.

Also I'm curious if the Wiccan folks give you a reason why they won't help. Another question I like to ask is this entity mean you harm or ill intent? There are unanswered questions here that I'm not seeing yet in order for me to say here's what you need to do. Based on the limited information given I suggest the violet flame as the go to modality as it transmute all things not of love into light and release it easily and effortlessly. Love is the strongest energy. Nothing of ill intent can exist in its light. I have experiences with strange noise footsteps and energy my friends' were uneasy about. I've cleared the space with what I suggested to you.

Blessings and best wishes.

Hi KaleTheOld, a warm welcome to SF, I wish you a wonderful spiritual experience here!

If smudging makes you sick, its probably a parasite thats taken up residence. Parasites tend to influence host behavior as to benefit them, the shaking, nausea, and chills are likely a parasite's response to make you leave the area that is harmful to it. You are going to have to pull/push it off of you. It will fight back, and that WILL hurt. A lot. I have them, I'm fighting them, and it sucks. They tend to attack those around you as well, such as your friends who committed suicide. Some people can't distinguish their thoughts from the injected thoughts of another entity, and thus become controlled by something else. Its very VERY hard for me to tell the difference, and I've been talking to these things for 16 years. Only figured out it was parasitic about two years ago. Go at it with the attitude that its my body, my mind, and my energy. You sure as heck can't have any of it.

I suggest making kitchen sage (NOT WHITE SAGE, that will kill you) tea, eating a reasonable amount of freshly ground pepper with each meal, maybe even crunching a peppercorn or two in your mouth to boot. The thing that's been following me HATES it. He jumps back and forth between me and my girlfriend, and while I've been able to cut the mental connection down almost all the way, she has not, and tells me it feels like I'm getting on her very last nerve, no matter what I do, whenever the parasite starts affecting her. Very clear sign that he doesn't like what I'm doing. I've also been told by some that cocoa powder can help you protect your mind from these things, so far its helped a bit.

I have this tea-and-dregs mixture that I rub all over myself to get him off me, its my "bug repellent" for when I just can't focus on getting him off me. It stains really badly, so I tend to put it on after I shower and let it dry, and I rub it EVERYWHERE I can reasonably reach. If you make an herbal mix be sure to look up toxicity levels of the essential oils/plant (preferably in an MSDS), as well as being sure to shake the mixture thoroughly before applying. Make yourself like a poisonous urchin: touch me, you get burned. Try to Identify and cease behaviors that it promotes/leeches off of/desires.

You say you were "enlightened". How so? If something randomly came and told you a thing or two be careful, thats how they work. They try to get you as lost as possible in some strange facade. Don't rush to any conclusions, Ive been there, thinking I suddenly had it all laid out in front of me to understand. It ended up being a ruse, an attempt to own who I was and dictate what I did. If its too good to be true, or too extreme without definitive proof to be logical, it is not to be acted upon, plain and simple.

I feel like theres more detail to your story that you may have either not posted, or was overlooked/left out in thinking that it was trivial. I would really like to talk to you. While I don't have many well defined answers, I might be able to help you dispel some confusion and gain some kind of direction through comparing and contrasting our personal experiences.

Honestly I can tell you more than one lifetime of experiences with it. In my dreams. I've been in some for years even decades. But still. Theres no way to tell you all I know except in person. I've known the presence for longer than a lifetime. When I say enlightened, I mean I connected my dream of decaying ruins. In which I was being chased by one entity and killed an innocent one. The girl that follows me is actually harmless, but it has another presence that is also corrupting it. Ones acting out of love. The other wants to use the energy of Tibet to create the purple hazy ruins here. I've also made a lot of mistakes in my life tampering with things I didn't understand. Now I've dug a whole so deep that people can feel my power even if skeptical. My friend said I was comparable to a presence at the bottom of a river that he came across multiple times. I'm glad I'm powerful enough to always be okay. But the people who aren't. Which is all who I met. Are endangered all the time...

I can list them off, but I don't want to lie the mistakes you'd all understand then. But youd all call me stupid and hate me...

Nothing will purge it from me, and I literally have escaped death miraculously over 50 times. The wickens and mediums do not have reason they just say they'll help then avoid me completely. I assume because they dont want to take it home.

Nobody hates you here Kale. This is quite a friendly forum. But you are obviously going through some difficult things right now.
I send you my heartfelt kind thoughts and all my best wishes. That's the best I can do at this moment.

So I guess tho has blown up. More than a few are intrigued. Well two nights ago I heard a bang and couldn't figure out what it was, last night I find a split across M ceiling that wasn't there.. I think its a bit mad

They tantrum when you do things they don't like. Yours seems to be close enough to the "physical frequency" to do things, either that or its SERIOUSLY well-fed. I have had more than one experience with a "practitioner" where they said they could handle it, and then subsequently get their rear handed to them by my lovely little "attachment". This is heavy duty stuff, you are going to have to experiment to see how to make it work out in your favor, one way or another. Some people work out deals (ill advised), while others like myself try to fight it off, some succeeding. The hardest part is choosing what you want to do and sticking to it. Just be sure its something you can stick to, as you can't be wishy washy about these things. If you are going to try getting rid of it, you have to keep up the self-treatment, whatever that may be. Its like any other infection, stop treating for a while and it will regain its strength, like getting sicker after not finishing all of your antibiotics, even though the symptoms went away. Are you scared of it? Don't be, not to say it won't try to harm you/can't harm you, but fear helps them do that. I won't advocate the "change your vibration" approach, as it doesn't always work (it doesn't for me), but you definitely need to have the right attitude when trying to run something out of your life.
As far as "escaping death miraculously", yes they will protect their food, they want to think of you as "theirs". I've experienced that as well.
LOVE? How cliche. I had one of them tell me she loved me, that she wanted nothing more than my love in return, and what did she do? She tried to make me her servant, her curse-maker. They lie, trick, steal, and hit as far below the belt as they can to get what they want done. I've also heard the "I've been with you for X ages/time/years, so you should be buds with me again" before. Its hogwash, parasites jump ship pretty often unless they find you particularly tasty. If you are concerned about there actually being a dead lover of lives past, ask him/her to please leave you, as you are going through a rough time, and would like to figure out what is happening in your life before taking a look at the relationship between the two of you, whatever it may be. If after several times it doesn't leave, its not respecting you, and that is something you cannot have. Its your world, your life, and you choose what you allow in it. No ifs ands or buts, there is always a choice.

Now, I also understand that there is a possibility of entities with a positive intent towards humanity, I just haven't met anything like that in my life, much to my misfortune. I've met neutral ones, but never outright positive.

On the "call you stupid and hate me" I made a deal with this thing when I was 6 years old. A deal with something I had just met.
Is that stupid? yes. Do I hate myself for it? no. Do I face-palm HARD when I look back on it? yes, yes I do.
Should I hate you for the stupid things you do? Of course not. Life is one big learning process, and the mother of all teachers is trial and error, often resulting in a trial with error.

Diagnosis of a problem, be it medical, spiritual, or physical requires all the information you can muster as to bring about a greater understanding of the problem. If someone wants to try and finger-wag-shame-on-you because you made a mistake, they can go elsewhere to get their superiority fix of the day. If you seriously want to solve your problems, you ignore them and read the posts that actually offer help and try to figure out what has gone wrong from what you have experienced. If you are serious about this problem, you should hold back NO DATA that doesn't compromise your well being(address, phone, social, bank account, home address, etc... keep those private). Try anything that doesn't put you in danger, i.e.: no blood/bodily offering, no deals, no calling to entities or deities that you do not trust/know/feel comfortable with (stranger danger!), fire without fire safety precautions, etc...

If it works, hooray it works! If it doesn't, at most you will feel slightly silly, slightly disappointed/frustrated, and then you will move on to try the next thing on the list.

If you suddenly get the thing freaking out and telling you that it doesn't want you talking about it, threatening you for telling, or other means of intimidation, you keep trying to find a way to get this bully out of your life. End of story, unless that is, you want to work with the thing. Usually doesn't end up well, but I've found people who are happy doing that.

Again, I wish you luck and hope you reach a solution you can live with.

Well. That's the thing. One day in September after the stone broke boom idea in my head to write in blood on my own body. But it finds me supremely tasty. As I said. I'm comparable to a presence my friend felt from the bottom of a lake. He said my power was the same as its. I wont tell you what name I wrote on my hand. But a couple days ago I burned the card after it wouldn't leave my friends alone and since I've had full power of its energy. When I close my eyes in the dark I used to only see blue. Now its blue and yellow. Also I used to only make myself weightless now I can also put severe weight. Since I've come across all this power I haven't felt drained at all. Which is odd. I dont feel unsafe anywhere now. Its like when I was younger again. But the day I burnt the card my mom didn't want to talk to me anymore in hysterics saying "you win" repeatedly. It has only talked to me through electronics and dreams before I'm not a speaker. And my ability to see depends on the things that at going on around me. If anyone can explain my new found control itd be appreciated since i got very confused. Also the wicken i talked to originally called me a very old soul. Older than her. Still lost about that one.

Thanks for all the support

K

When you have power, power has you. The inverse can be true as well, such is the case for zia and I. When he linked himself into me, I gained extra senses, feelings of extra body parts and a greater ability to control energy. Were they mine? No, they were not. HE linked with my system, a being who already knew how to control energy very well. Through that link, I could use him and he could use me. Your power may be the same as its because it is linked with you, however you are not the same, and I advise splitting that link as soon as possible if it is in fact eating off of you. Use your own power, and only yours, you will probably find it to be stronger than what you have now, as you are having to share it between two beings.

I wouldn't be surprised if I found zia from one of the various rocks i had picked up and fiddled with on an energy level, I liked to do that when I was small.

They can also tamper with your senses, nonphysical or physical. zia and kuai cut me off from seeing when I began to sincerely suspect unsavory activity on their end. I've been seeing a few things for the first time in a very long time now that I've begun fighting zia seriously, he can't keep up with his wounds and my suppression.

They don't take much, they take slowly unless they feel that they are in trouble, then they start stockpiling. If you have bonded only recently to this thing, then it won't be a stable enough bond to sap you significantly. It takes a while to stabilize under some circumstances, and you think everything is fine, you just got a power boost! Whoop dee do this thing is so great, I love it so much its my friend and I want it around fooorrreeevveeerrr.... thats the attitude they want to get out of you before they start pushing their limits with their "food". You're lucky you had the sense to ask whats going on before it got situated.

So it was interested in you, trying to get closer to you for a long time if it was visiting you in your dreams. Try and ask your mom whats up, be subtle, just ask why that card was important. If all you get is freakout without any real reason, she might be being messed with too. I have read of these things following families through the generations.

Blue when you close your eyes? is it a cyan-color? If so that is very intriguing, as I've had two time-stop experiences when everything in my vision is tinted cyan. It was zia, initially test-running our link and then protecting me from something else later.

"presence felt at the bottom of a lake" Is that lake close to where you live? What goes on there? Is the stone from near there, or has it ever been there?
How long have you lived near this lake, if ever? Do you drink from it, at all?

It could be the same being, could be a different being expressing a similar energy type. Gotta dig a little on that one.

As much control as it seems these things may have over you, its only POTENTIAL control... i.e. you have to let it happen for it to happen. Some will back off if you just tell them no, but with others, thats just like asking for a brawl. Some will back off for a while, then try their luck again to see how leniant/stupid/unaware you can be. You have to have a bite as good as, or worse than your bark most of the time, or they won't listen to you. You also have to not be afraid to bite them back when they cross the line.

"old soul"... Oh dear... Don't take it to heart, how "old your soul is" doesn't matter nearly as much as what is happening here and now. Get control of the situation HERE AND NOW, then worry about picking through the less critical information, like past lives. You don't research a house's past when you find out it has bed bugs, you kill the bed bugs.

Wiccans are a rather... frustrating lot in my experience. Wicca is a religion AND a spirituality. I tend to consider religion brain bleach/social control and true spirituality to be a more constructive thing. Its not black/white, wiccans aren't all bad, I've just had a lot of experiences where they don't actually know anything useful beyond what they've read in books, they don't know how to deal with something, and they often times don't know what they are dealing with. If you think about it, its kind of like us right now. Both of us are trying to figure things out, at our own varying degrees, and are bumbling around ultimately in a rather clueless manner.
Some people will be more willing to accept "its a spirit guide here to help you" because the being says so, or because someone else tells them that there are no "bad" or "evil" spirits. Meanwhile, some of them ARE going to know useful information, some of them will be able to duke it out with these things and win, but those are few and far between.
I suppose you could compare it to the structure of christian churches. Just because you are a follower does not make you a proper practitioner of sacraments. The same goes for wiccans, only a significantly greater portion of that congregation think they can bite off more than they can actually chew.

Do them a favor and keep them from being involved if they have the attitude of "I don't know whats wrong with you but I will try to help" and immediately start doing rituals. Thats how people get hurt. Its like getting someone to tell that hooded figure who's been following you to get off your tail, right to his face in the middle of a dark alley. He's not going to do anything pleasant to your friend if he can help it.

I've seen people get messed with really badly in trying to help me. Its not hopeless, I've met one or two people who could actually defend themselves and swat at this thing, but not very many you meet are going to be well versed in this matter.

On another note... Something that might help overall that too many people overlook: clear-minded logic

As illogical as everything appears to be, logic is relative. You might want to adjust the way you think of the world. Not everything is as concrete as it seems: just because you perceive weight, or see something that appears to be put under strain, does not mean that you specifically did it, or that what appeared to be done was actually done the way it usually is. It just means you observed a phenomenon (get it down to the very most basic things you can, no causation, only what it looks like and what happened to it) and take what notes you can on the phenomenon. Keep a calendar for notes with date/time on the instances. Treat it like a science experiment, thats how you can learn the most about it. There are some sort of rules, some sort of mechanism, and some sort of function that allows what you observe to be observed, you just don't necessarily KNOW what that is yet. You can never KNOW 100% what it is, you can just be "pretty sure", thats just how science works.

That being said, applying Occam's razor to things, disregarding the possibility that "I'm dreaming, its not real" or " I'm insane" in a non-denial manner, keeping it the lowest on the list, you can still discern probable causes, probable reason and other information from what you observe. Its confusing, its wonky, and it sure does make you think way outside the box most of us are conditioned into, but it can help a lot to be as "scientific as possible" even though empirical measurements are hard to come by as data.

Am I helpful to you? I sure hope my giant walls of text do something...

Yes Tavviin you have by far given me some useful insight. Btw my energy that used to be a full sparkly matte blue. By which I mean as close to the primary colour as possible. Is now fluctuating with a beautiful white and laced with yellow. The yellow being it's. Also. The stone has been around my whole life. Not even my family knows where it came from. The power in the lake doesn't resonate the same way mine does. My friend just said the amount of power I hold is comparable to it. (in amount) his way of saying I'm more powerful than anyone he met. And that's without its power. He can distinguish it from me.

Also just a warning. Just so you all know the name I wrote was in hebrew. A mythological being or beings of sorts. Hope that gives you all a hint. Tavviin I honestly expect you get it first.

I also used to sleep with the stone in my bed and its been connected for a long while. So separation would be kind of hard for me to do seeing as how I've been around it so long. My friend thinks its at rest waiting, for a moment to try and get back at me. Also the blood pact I made was for power. He says its most likely a double edged sword for me and the entity.

I've also come to think that it would want my body if we weren't at a stalemate, if I haven't explained before I've seen decaying ruins with an ominous purple mist, in the dream I was chased by a hunter. When I felt a presence behind me I killed an innocent person that wouldn't harm anyone. If youd like me to respond quicker and you are on here at certain times let me know and I can talk for hours.

I will continue looking through this myself. I await the time I am at 25 posts and I can message you directly so I can explain everything to the best of my abilities. I do better with q and a.

Talk soon

-K

Tavvin seem to be on point there. Perhaps the scientific method will be more of use in this situation. Very valid points about practitioners of various religious and spiritual sect.

Thank you sabine! I try my hardest to maintain a rational outlook on things that tend to drive people (me) up a wall. It kinda helps that I'm a science major and take my future profession seriously. There is nothing in the scientific method that states an inability to apply it to the nonphysical!
(totally a magical scientist, right?) ;)

Though most people tend to shy away from studying the unseen due to the difficulty of collecting empirical data from study, though that hasn't stopped psychologists from studying the mind... who knows the real reason this stuff isn't properly studied? Either way, I plan to become a functional shaman (sort of?) one day a long way from now. Can't let these things get away with what they do to us, now can I. ;)
Its also motivated by how hard it is to find people who know what to do about this sort of problem. Knowledge is power, and I plan to share what little I have gleaned with any who can make good use of it.

Hello Kale,

I read a lot of confusion, fear and anger, but I don't feel a reason for it. First of all, maybe you do know that, but I feel it important to state: The only evil that exists is in the humans mind. There is no good nor evil in the pure spirit of the universe, no hell, no devil, no deamons. It is all made of the same and it is all one. However there are contrasts, varieties and being human enables us to experience a wide range of things, one amongst them is fear. And fear, is the source of all that we call "evil", because it makes us act in ways that are not natural for us, but above all, it disrupts the flow of energy. The simplest example for that: When we are afraid, our muscels cramp and not only our bloodstream but also the stream of energy in our body gets disrupted.

Now, second; as we know everything is connected, but growing up as a human we get the illusion of separation, of our body being separated from the world around us. This simply is not true. Following that thought, the energy flowing in our body does not stop at the borders of our body, it leaves our body i.e. in form of our thoughts and feelings. But if that energy that leaves our body is disrupted, it eather gets cleared by another energy or it stays as a shadow. And those shadows are, what people experience as negative energies or deamons.

Third; a fearful, angry or confused mind trying to banish those energies / shadows, will do nothing but add disrupted energy to them, make them grow. Getting rid of it won't help, clearing or more accurately healing it, will.

Now you do have access to some power, and its obvious that signs are being sent to you, and this has a reason. Now I strongly agree with whats being said here, don't talk to someone who won't understand. And the sad thing is; most people won't. Not because they dont want to, or not care about you, but because they are not ready yet, and nothing can change that, it is their path, and they have to be ready to open up.
As for those who you have consulted, as wickas, aso and who turned away: It is either people who are not grounded enough in their power to know there is no reason to be afraid, but they do feel (conscious or subconscious) that by being afraid they wont be able to help you, or it is people who claim to be what they are not. However, it is in your power to contact your spiritual guide and ask for help. You can even ask for someone to come into your life, who can help you. If you yourself are, even the slightest confused, afraid or angry, DONT try to get rid of it. Because having a lot of power, means receiving and giving a lot of energy, also as being able to manipulate it. But if disrupted, you can not clear energy. However you can protect yourself until your spiritual guide helps you or sends you someone who can help:

-ask angels for help, if you arent experienced start small and ask one of them to stand at each corner of the bed and protect you. If you are experienced, start with your home and ask at least two to guard you in your daily life.
-get sand, stones, crystals, feathers (whatever draws you), make a circle on the floor and sit in the middle of it. Ask the spirit to make this your safety shield, to protect you and imagine the circle becoming light, rising from the floor until the top of your head. You could feel some electricity in the air at this point, or heat, or hear some crackling, that is normal.
-somewhere inside an old soul/spirit/power lies all the wisdom and the light you need to get through it, you just need a way to access it. When I was a child, I had a shadow following me around my parents house. I asked my guardian angel for help to protect myself, and the next time I felt its presence, my hands moved automatically into a pose, that felt so natural but I never saw or did before and so I held it against the shadow and it worked. It didn't make the shadow go away, because its only purpose is to protect of course, but the energy couldnt get near me everytime I did that pose. As I grew older and accessed more and more of my knowledge and powers, I didnt have to do the pose anymore, it just came from within. But it can be a good starting point (no matter how old you are) especially if something scares you.

Now why did I advise you to protect yourself, when I wrote that there is no evil, you or someone else here might ask. Whatever it is around you, it is trying to communicate to you, to give you signs. Ignoring it, running away from it or trying to banish it, just makes it grow, because those courses of action come from fear. Also the human body limits our way of perception to a minimal point. It doesn't initially see, hear, feel or understand what there is. When we open up, we are however able to access things that are classified as "paranormal" but in truth are always there and as normal as everything else. Our mind however, with the knowledge it got from this world/society, gets into some kind of alarm mode, because that is what it learned. Now, as long as those things "freak" you out, make you scared, or confused or angry, you can be sure, that your mind and not your spirit/soul is dominating your life. In which case, protect yourself and ask for help, dont try to fight it.

Love and Light,
Alandria

I've asked the universe for help many times before. And does anyone know the consequences of breaking a red bloodstone? My grandfather was a geologist, I dropped it long ago and it split in half. I'll try some of the things in that list before. But a lot of those did not work. You say there is no evil, or good. But I completely disagree. There are too many things in this world that I've come across in this world.

-K

Hi Kale,

please read more carfully:
"The only evil that exists is in the humans mind. There is no good nor evil in the pure spirit of the universe"

Light and love,
Alandria

Yes, everything is connected, one way or another. However, the question here is, what do I want to connect to directly, and what will the consequences of being connected directly to that entity be? There are many connections that are harmful to us, connections that we should not draw ourselves closer to, or even be direct contact with. Just because you happen to know a guy who knows a guy who happens to have a cousin who makes meth doesn't mean you should accept the man that makes meth into your life. The two are linked, but distanced, so they don't have a significant effect on the other, at least not as much as they would if they got closer.

I am pretty sure both of us are experiencing some sort of connection that is negatively impacting our lives. I cant speak for both of us though.

What it seems alandria is trying to say (correct me if I'm wrong), however put into a different manner, is that there is no true evil, nor true good; that the terms are relative to a perception. If that is what you are saying, I can agree with that, however if you are toting the "nothing will harm you because there is no evil..." then I have to disagree entirely.

"zia" is probably starting to perceive me as being a threat to him, thus he reacts accordingly with increased assault/interruption of my daily life. I do not view him as evil, I see him and others of his ilk has doing what they do to exist given the pressures exerted on them by a system foreign to our knowledge, whatever that may be. The result of this is unfavorable, downright disruptive even, to me and my existence. I do not think I have caused this, as zia began physically harming me and my girlfriend long BEFORE I realized that he was displaying behavior that matched parasitism, not to mention he had harmed me in the past when I did not obediently follow/accept his word. It honestly makes him look like he has some kind of underlying god complex, when he is rather clearly not something worth worshiping. I have tried to "kiss and make up" with him, he comes right back around and hurts me. Sometimes other people/entities just don't want to heal, or their demands for forgiveness are to an unacceptable degree (devotion, sacrifice, etc...) and you simply can't comply because you don't want to walk that path.

I don't know what to say to the "heal it and it will be gone" logic, I've talked to zia, he wants me to feed him and accept him into my energy, self, and life. If I don't, he steals energy from me, bruises me, makes it harder for me and anyone around me who opposes him to think straight. I have tried to tell him that he can't go on harming others and I want to help him get better, but he does not want to change, so he does not cooperate.

Hes a bully, plain and simple. If the "signs from the universe" are going to be beings like this, then I don't think I like the universe anymore. I don't believe he is that, to be honest, as I've gotten what I've needed before by putting my will out for some sort of understanding.

I don't have the right to force him to change his path, just as he does not have the right to assault me and treat me the way he has. z may not be human, but he is still a "person" in my eyes. So the only option left is, unfortunately, conflict. Unless you suggest that asserting my will over his and influencing his thoughts, as he has done to me (and to my girlfriend along with others I have known), and utilizing that to force him to change is the better solution. Should I fight strange fire with fire of the same kind?

Also, how would a being comprised of energy that was once a part of you behave when you, per se, compare it to an independent energy-based entity? What would be a dead giveaway that its "yours" as opposed to "not yours". I've been pondering ways to determine this for a long time, and I can't seem to figure anything out that would reliably test it.

Another note, Whatever I am experiencing expresses its discontent towards my use of sage, pepper, and other "protective/cleansing" herbs as a full-body-rub of sorts. It usually does this by running to either me or my girlfriend, whoever didn't get rubbed down first. It does not run after my roommate because I would not care if he got hurt as much as my girlfriend and I, I don't like him. My roommate also does not know about zia. After the rub-down, its blows are cushioned and greatly hindered. It can't get through nearly as well as before. Don't know if thats significant to you or not.