Holy Cow

[Deepsoul]

Having some crazy ego die off thing ,but also lost all my compassion ,not sure whats happening but its like I have to express from my heart stuff, feeling like really self centered, ,usually Jesus is guiding me but its like Ive been given the reins and I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place ,anybody know what I'm going through?

[Deepsoul]

I'm just gonna go pray feels right sorry ,must seem very self centered but feeling it massively ,

[Deepsoul]

its been happening a bit lately ,I keep getting shown a heap of stuff to do with ego ,it must be part of the transcendence...

[Lance & Rite]

I figure compassion has a purpose as does everything else. Coming from a Christian culture we tend to presume it has inherent value but that is probably not correct. Every material work can be corrupted, even compassionate ones. Maybe what you are experiencing is related to this.

[knightofalbion]

Could be the lower self trying to pull the higher self back ...

You are only human, you're going to stumble sometimes. The thing is to get back up!

No-one said it would be easy ....

[knightofalbion]

And on the subject of 'holy cows' and compassion.

The next time you see a cow, go over and have a look in those big, beautiful, sad eyes ... There is soul looking back at you, and if that doesn't kindle compassion, nothing will.

[naturesflow]

Having some crazy ego die off thing ,but also lost all my compassion ,not sure whats happening but its like I have to express from my heart stuff, feeling like really self centered, ,usually Jesus is guiding me but its like Ive been given the reins and I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place ,anybody know what I'm going through?

When your riding the wave of your own balance, everthing arises as you deepen through many waves. Don't despair, its called intergrating and it doesn't leave you, just deepens through a whole host of circumstances and openings in yourself. Sometimes going alone, shows you what you leaning on in yourself in another, whether it be Jesus, friends or god. Ultimately your going to find yourself feeling like this while you clear and and reconnect in time. I remember one time feeling like I had lost all care. But the space I was moving through was to transform care and let go of it in the old way of care. True self and core essence has no attachments, not even to Jesus, if you holding him as attachment. He like all souls can be held lightly without the heaviness of human identity attached to him so feeling how it all feels alone opens up much when attachments we trust do not feel like they are there. Nothing really leaves, its the shifting in feelings that is deepening our connection in us.

So compassion is no different. When your open and clear feeling it, nothing behind it, it is part of your true self. It doesn't leave, it just gets covered over with stuff that is being released and opening you deeper.

[naturesflow]

The other thing is sometimes you have to be ok feeling selfish. The way through to filling up and letting go is a whole process in itself. Selfish leads to self needs taken care of first to then support others. Christian beliefs can sometimes make us feel like we, when caring for self, feeling like this that it is not ok. Everything you feel is ok and is showing you yourself, acknowledgment helps to let things go, that you don't like, but first they want to be noticed.

[django]

Having some crazy ego die off thing ,but also lost all my compassion ,not sure whats happening but its like I have to express from my heart stuff, feeling like really self centered, ,usually Jesus is guiding me but its like Ive been given the reins and I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place ,anybody know what I'm going through?

How do you feel your ego dying off? Are you doing anything to shift it?

[Deepsoul]

Natures that was amazing ,Thankyou ,and as always Knight of Wisdom Thankyou for making me laugh.

Ardhanateshvara ,blinking a lot trying to stay grounded here, trying not to freak out...thanks also Lance and rite cant think about that right now though

[Greenslade]

Having some crazy ego die off thing ,but also lost all my compassion ,not sure whats happening but its like I have to express from my heart stuff, feeling like really self centered, ,usually Jesus is guiding me but its like Ive been given the reins and I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place ,anybody know what I'm going through?You can call it a transcending if you like, it's your experience so call it Henry if that suits you. Authentic empowerment is pretty scary stuff when it happens, it's something akin to how a bird feels when the cage door is opened for the first time and there's a big. wide world to fly through and over.

Ease up on the definitions a little though, smooth out those wrinkles and hard places. Ego isn't all bad, it's simply a point of reference for the centre of a sphere of consciousness and your sphere of consciousness has just exploded. Ego becomes I Am becomes Self becomes.... Perhaps Jesus doesn't need to guide you any more so he's 'taken a step back', if anything you've become a little more like him - which is what he always said we could do.

Scientifically your heart is amazing. It's not just the thing that pumps the blood around your body, it's also what sends out a 360 degree electromagnetic pulse at the speed of light every time it beats. Our bodies are antennae, think of a radio signal that becomes clearer when you hold the antenna. Science fact. What's in your heart that you would like to send out into the Universe for others to receive? And true compassion comes from the heart, it's what you feel you need to do rather than something you 'should do' because, well, those are the rules.

Yes it is self-centred kinda but centred on Your Self, it's always been about you/yourself/Your Self....... But not really just you unless you live alone on a deserted island with no forums.

[Deepsoul]

mmm scary stuff in a way but just allowing myself to say that without sugar coating has got my heart chakra working again ,now your right there I am feeling like I want to reach out to the community ,at this time my health is fairly compromised ,ive always thought it was to do with my spirituality to a degree , its like natures was saying or like how the the bible says God works as far as giving up and then receiving back ,I'm not sure that I have a lot of control sometimes as I feels like I'm being groomed to do my best for God ,and as well now perhaps this new self also ,as ive always been a gonna type and not really achieved so much per say ,check out my thread in spirit and sexuality if you like, this thing is full on I literally cant do anything that raises my heart rate at this time ,and haven't exercised in 10 mnths ,so a lot of vanity was sorted , it seems like I'm wanted for higher purposes with out sounding egotistical...

[Greenslade]

it seems like I'm wanted for higher purposes with out sounding egotistical...You are your higher purpose so relax and take it easy. You don't have to charge around as though your tail is on fire and 'spread the word', all you have to be is the example for others to follow if they so wish. You are 'infectious'.

[Belle]

It's not egotistical to say you are wanted for higher purposes. We all are. Just not everyone connects with it.

Stay hydrated. Rest. Be grounded and breathe.

[Lorelyen]

The other thing is sometimes you have to be ok feeling selfish. The way through to filling up and letting go is a whole process in itself. Selfish leads to self needs taken care of first to then support others. Christian beliefs can sometimes make us feel like we, when caring for self, feeling like this that it is not ok. Everything you feel is ok and is showing you yourself, acknowledgment helps to let things go, that you don't like, but first they want to be noticed.

Good point, that. "Selfish" gets bad press often because of envy or helplessness on behalf of others - it is magnified by materialism and desire for luxury. But what else is spirituality but selfish? Unless you consider your own energic capacity first you can't go out into the world to do stuff for others.

I often read posts here about "love yourself" before whatever else....


...

[knightofalbion]

It's not egotistical to say you are wanted for higher purposes. We all are. Just not everyone connects with it.

Stay hydrated. Rest. Be grounded and breathe.

'wanted for higher purposes ...'

If 'you' have ever been in a wood or forest, amidst the accompanying mirk, and then suddenly coming to a little glade with a shaft of sunlight piercing the gloom like it was descending from Heaven ...

Akin to the light of the soul.

[Deepsoul]

Thankyou everyone I feel the journey is just beginning ,its sorta like Ive come full circle in a way but have more of an understanding of my creatorship, I could not and still will always praise the Lord with all my heart as this feels right =, theres much we don't fully understand I believe, and that connection remains as a source of love ,and wisdom and guidance, but I see it also now in my own heart ,which I seem to have been so disconnected from through all the pain and drama that Ive endured for so long ,and so the beautiful mystery of this thing called soul continues to want to shine and I pray it to have its full day in the sun,,,Amen

[Shinsoo]

Many people pray to God, or certain people. There is nothing wrong with that--so long as it helps you spiritually and grow as a person.

I would advise to you, to pray as you see fit. But if you start to not feel like it's serving you as it used to--don't be afraid to explore other options. Love can be expressed and reached within a myriad of ways.

There is a LOT we don't know and it generally is of spiritual benefit to keep your mind open. :)

Best of luck in the New Year, Deepsoul

[naturesflow]

[QUOTE=Lorelyen]Good point, that. "Selfish" gets bad press often because of envy or helplessness on behalf of others - it is magnified by materialism and desire for luxury. But what else is spirituality but selfish? Unless you consider your own energic capacity first you can't go out into the world to do stuff for others.

Yes it can. This is the conditioning. Love self/love others, how you do this in the order you do this, will open up both aspects as a whole host being held down by conditioning if your conditioned in how to love and be love in you. Love is free and open, nothing attached, imo it becomes part of your being self. So as you move yourself into the world, what you are moves with you. So for every gap you give and do not give back to you, use the reflection both ways, you could ask yourself, where am I loving from?

I have a sister who does wonderful things for others, loves and gives freely, but I notice her path now (she is ten years older than me, so a little more conditioned by religion and being the eldest child in a large family has a greater measure of conditioned responsibility in her) is about her. You could literally see the shift back in her life and process. And the lessons about how she loves are all arising for her. Its hard, I Know this space. But you cant avoid yourself even as you over give or think being loving and compassionate can stand the test of time if your not clear and balanced in you.

Being all those wonderful things we strive for, requires our own self reflection, not just grin and bare it and suffer in the process of loving and giving without our own tank filled or even walking on egg shells. In time those egg shells will start to cut your toes you know..haha Loving kindness and mindfulness is in us to find and be. The balance of giving and receiving is in us to find and share in everyway we give to this world.

I often read posts here about "love yourself" before whatever else....

We are it, everything we project into the world. So it makes sense to me to become the real deal, not half hearted..:wink:

I think Jesus story has in some ways conditioned us to love unconditionally, and not regard our own needs, but we need to consider the state of his being as a whole, that was projected/shared with the world, he set the bar of human capacity, but the story didn't lend to the building of this state. More just be it. Easier said than done when your here to offload all that which built you away from the true and natural state that I believe he didn't lose. More it was nurtured fully and he was able to shine his true self, complete, modelling the potential of every human being..The key word "potential"...

[naturesflow]

[QUOTE=Shinsoo]Many people pray to God, or certain people. There is nothing wrong with that--so long as it helps you spiritually and grow as a person.

Yes. Prayer supports process, but eventually prayer will open you to go deeper to listen, not talk, not ask. Just listen.

. But if you start to not feel like it's serving you as it used to--don't be afraid to explore other options. Love can be expressed and reached within a myriad of ways.

Yes this is very true. We are here to experience life in so many ways, not just one way. The way is in us. But we have to listen deeper to know the direction. And not be afraid to let go and allow it.

There is a LOT we don't know and it generally is of spiritual benefit to keep your mind open. :)


Very wise sharing Shinsoo. I just wanted to acknowledge what you shared in my own way, because what you shared, offers some very real and practical advice that I know I had to open to in this way you are saying.

[running]

Having some crazy ego die off thing ,but also lost all my compassion ,not sure whats happening but its like I have to express from my heart stuff, feeling like really self centered, ,usually Jesus is guiding me but its like Ive been given the reins and I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place ,anybody know what I'm going through?

For me that was part of the experience of change. What compassion was and what it became were two different things. The need to do this and that. Became the acceptance of what is.

Wich felt like a loss of compassion. Its about imo transcending my self from ordinary to being bliss itself. In that is much more acceptance of what is. Before that is a feeling of neediness to make things more how i thought they should be.

But for me i have found once i am less needy from the bliss. Going without as much is a great deal easier.which can be seen as compassion. If i need less. Then others can have more.

Compassion can be defined in many ways. In any case if thats what you want its easier and easier to give as more and more of the holy spirit becomes you i have found.

[Lightwaves]

I wish I would have seen this earlier so I could do this...

*High five* Congrats! May your understanding of yourself and God deepen more and more as you will. May love and happiness be so entwined with who you are that you can think of no greater joy than to be right where you are. Congrats Deepsoul. *Low five*

[Deepsoul]

Thankyou Running :smile: The bliss is amazing and the what was probably called responsibility in lay mans terms before has been downloaded as a spiritual birthright and empowerment, this sort of self love has never been my privilege before ,for me the understanding on a deep level that God has given me the chance to create and love in all ways and manners beyond my wildest dreams is amazing ,but also as you say Tridek gain a deeper Understanding of myself and this Godilyness, Thankyou for your grounding and deeply felt post Tridek ,that's for sure its in the here and now, High five ,low five and knuckles my friend.....:smile: