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Jellybeansme
21-12-2015, 10:22 PM
I have an energy vampire in my life!!
No matter how I rise above this person, I seem to be dragged back down as she is a very vindictive and poisonous.
I cannot simply remove her from my life completely otherwise I would of done this many moons ago hahaha, in all seriousness, I am spiritualy growing and each year I'm amazed by this new awakening within but everytime I start to feel content and serene, she manages to upset the apple cart.
How can I protect myself!

Jellybeansme
21-12-2015, 11:23 PM
I have tried gemstones, I have tried mentally blocking, and I have tried the kill them with kindness ??

No answer tells me that there is no way and that even the most experience spiritualist has that vampire in there life ..

One of life's tests

Melahin
21-12-2015, 11:36 PM
Maybe it is something you need to resolve within yourself... and that you will be dragged back to that place until it is.

Deepsoul
21-12-2015, 11:51 PM
Yes there is much we can learn from others ,have a look at assertiveness as well as empathy on a deep level ,why do u think she is like this,has she had trauma in her life ,does she know she does it and have you spoken openly to her about it ,which then may trigger her to go deeper into herself as well...

youngers1810
21-12-2015, 11:54 PM
I think i have an energy vampire it feels like all my energy is being drained away i tell them to go away as politely as i can say on here but yet they remain .

jellybeans me when i have garlic their presence seems to ease may i suggest placing garlic of some kind where it most effects you even though they from a different realm the garlic still seems to effect them.

hope this is useful please let me know.

Emm
22-12-2015, 02:43 AM
I have an energy vampire in my life!!
No matter how I rise above this person, I seem to be dragged back down as she is a very vindictive and poisonous.
I cannot simply remove her from my life completely otherwise I would of done this many moons ago hahaha, in all seriousness, I am spiritualy growing and each year I'm amazed by this new awakening within but everytime I start to feel content and serene, she manages to upset the apple cart.
How can I protect myself!I believe whats happening is there are moments you are in alignment with your own source energy but when in the company of this person it lowers your vibration. Protection is not needed, just a mindful vigilance with your own thoughts and feelings when in her company. Sometimes we get dragged into judgemental thought patterns which brings on generally negative feelings and its this that's in conflict with your previous state that feels like a drain on your energy. So mindful self observation might help you.

Rah nam
22-12-2015, 05:04 AM
I have an energy vampire in my life!!
No matter how I rise above this person, I seem to be dragged back down as she is a very vindictive and poisonous.
I cannot simply remove her from my life completely otherwise I would of done this many moons ago hahaha, in all seriousness, I am spiritualy growing and each year I'm amazed by this new awakening within but everytime I start to feel content and serene, she manages to upset the apple cart.
How can I protect myself!

It looks like you still have some work to do. Figure it out and voila......

Jyotir
22-12-2015, 05:13 AM
Hi Jellybeansme,



One word: detachment.



If you feel "above it", but still engage, it means a superiority is trying to be acknowledged. Then you're caught.

It doesn't matter what the formal, 'legal' content is of any dispute or disharmony.

You've lost once you even consider the circumstance or the possible response.


You have to let go.
There is no obligation to participate.

It may also be helpful to pray for the capacity to do this. Or to ask God to deal with it, but then really give the problem over and forget it.
Focus on THAT - the solution - not the 'problem'.

~ J

MIND POWER
22-12-2015, 02:37 PM
It depends on your personality, if you are gentle person..? this is how you should deal with it...............

Manage your emotions, and try not to react! Life is a act sometimes, learn how to act really good! Its good to feel emotions, but learn how to control and contain them when around certain people............

Its the emotions which are the energy in motion! that's really simply advice, but that's all you can do. People who drain others, will eventually destroy themselves if nobody reacts to them....

So just don't react, be cool as you can be! haha no matter how annoyed and angry you get! and just watch them squirm like or maggots. Not that i have experienced this......but this is what i imagine the process to be like.

So Jellybeansme....(that's what you do! be cool calm and collected about this).........:smile:

Never have (too much) empathy for this type of person ether, you will be used! so i will have to disagree with what Deepsoul is saying up above. (Protect yourself and your emotions first! always!)....

Pagandell
22-12-2015, 03:29 PM
I have an energy vampire in my life!!
No matter how I rise above this person, I seem to be dragged back down as she is a very vindictive and poisonous.
I cannot simply remove her from my life completely otherwise I would of done this many moons ago hahaha, in all seriousness, I am spiritualy growing and each year I'm amazed by this new awakening within but everytime I start to feel content and serene, she manages to upset the apple cart.
How can I protect myself!

Just remember as soon as you feel the neg energy/ draining, imagine a very bright white light suronding you and that is all you can see the en vam get there neg vibes thrown back at them he he, it worked for me anyways :D

Belle
22-12-2015, 06:45 PM
Two things.

Firstly, vampires cannot exist without those willing to provide sustenance. Even if you don't conciously want it, there is some part of your psyche which is allowing this situation. You can't heal or do anything about the other person but you can help yourself and focus on what you need to do to release yourself from the energy.

THe other thing: grounding and shielding.

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:26 PM
Maybe!! I can be quite intolerant to bull**** lol and so I need to work on handling this better.. This is exactly why I am asking for guidance in this particular area as shutting this person out is not possible :-) I would love nothing more than have peace with this person, but I feel she is wounded

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:30 PM
It depends on your personality, if you are gentle person..? this is how you should deal with it...............

Manage your emotions, and try not to react! Life is a act sometimes, learn how to act really good! Its good to feel emotions, but learn how to control and contain them when around certain people............

Its the emotions which are the energy in motion! that's really simply advice, but that's all you can do. People who drain others, will eventually destroy themselves if nobody reacts to them....

So just don't react, be cool as you can be! haha no matter how annoyed and angry you get! and just watch them squirm like or maggots. Not that i have experienced this......but this is what i imagine the process to be like.

So Jellybeansme....(that's what you do! be cool calm and collected about this).........:smile:

Never have (too much) empathy for this type of person ether, you will be used! so i will have to disagree with what Deepsoul is saying up above. (Protect yourself and your emotions first! always!)....

I am a very gentle person and loving person!! I am told constently that I put others before myself, I know I do but that is me!! I would never wish harm on her, I genuinely care about her but she makes it impossible.

She has a past that I feel is why she the way she is, but trying to destroy mine is not going to better her future.. It's so silly! I bent over backwards for her for so many years until I began to see her darker side..

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:32 PM
Lol i think if I eat enough garlic! I will loose my good friends also.. Haha

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:34 PM
I will try this!! Thank you :-)

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:36 PM
It looks like you still have some work to do. Figure it out and voila......

Indeed! 100 percent agree! I guess my patience has worn thin :-(

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:37 PM
Hi Jellybeansme,



One word: detachment.



If you feel "above it", but still engage, it means a superiority is trying to be acknowledged. Then you're caught.

It doesn't matter what the formal, 'legal' content is of any dispute or disharmony.

You've lost once you even consider the circumstance or the possible response.


You have to let go.
There is no obligation to participate.

It may also be helpful to pray for the capacity to do this. Or to ask God to deal with it, but then really give the problem over and forget it.
Focus on THAT - the solution - not the 'problem'.

~ J

Thank you :-)

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 09:48 PM
Yes I know I am letting her get to me!! It's something that I can't seem to control. But when I release and let go, she finds a way to get to me.. All my friends and close relatives see what she does also!!

So I need to re-train my position and stay calm and grounded.. I will try this and I thank you all for your advice and guidance :-)

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 10:06 PM
Yes there is much we can learn from others ,have a look at assertiveness as well as empathy on a deep level ,why do u think she is like this,has she had trauma in her life ,does she know she does it and have you spoken openly to her about it ,which then may trigger her to go deeper into herself as well...

She didn't have such a great childhood, and from what I gather she was pretty lonely ... Personally I feel she is envious of my childhood memories :-( so she is almost trying her darn hardest to turn the tables.. I do feel for her, but I don't understand why she pushes me ... I am and always have been like a sister to her, was their at the drop of a hat when she needed me.. I guess I'm getting to a point now where I am exhausted by her and feel I can no longer take her spiteful ness. She has sucseeded in forcing family apart and she is not very animal friendly, I have had to regime many of her animals due to neglect..i can't bare to be around her for the sake of my own sanity hahahaha oh I'm laughing but inside I'm crying .. :-)

Jellybeansme
22-12-2015, 10:10 PM
Just remember as soon as you feel the neg energy/ draining, imagine a very bright white light suronding you and that is all you can see the en vam get there neg vibes thrown back at them he he, it worked for me anyways :D

Ooo I will try this !! :-) :wink:

wavesdream
24-12-2015, 08:35 PM
Hi,

I think I can relate to your situation. I've been surrounded by emotional vampires my whole life. I broke all ties with them except for one relationship I need to keep vaguely alive for the sake of someone else. I can barely stand reading her emails. I try to just look for the important elements while not actually reading, otherwise they can mess with my mind for days.


First of all, are you absolutely sure you can't get out of this relationship?

If you can't, you need to put the maximum distance between you and her.


Based on my experience, here's my advice for when you have to interact with her:

When she talks to you, let her talk but don't get invested in the conversation unless you need to. Don't start conversations, and, very important, do not talk about yourself. Refrain from sharing anything you're going through, anything that bothers you, anything you do or think, anything your neighbor's dog did yesterday... Anything. If you need to talk, talk to someone else.
If she asks, you need to make your replies as short and vague as you can. It's probable she'll hardly notice. If she insists, paraphrase your previous reply and then ask her something about herself.

Never complain about anything. Always be positive, happy, assertive. Praise her. Seem interested in what she says even if you're not. If she seems to complain about something, look like you deeply emphasize with her while saying close to nothing. Nod or paraphrase her.

If she's anything like my vampires, you hardly even need to really listen to what she says, just give her the reaction she looks like she's waiting for. Don't start her on any topic, make your conversations as short as you can. Leave as soon as you can. When you leave, refrain from giving her an explanation why you have to leave. You have to leave, that's all she needs to know.

The less you give her, the less power she has on you. You just need to pretend. Don't worry about looking like a hypocrite. From my experience, vampires don't notice because they don't have empathy and they don't care about you. They'll never waste any second of their precious time putting themselves in your shoes. All they care about is what they get from you: praise and control. As long as you feed them that illusion, you're fine.


Even if you do all that, being around them is still exhausting. But at least you keep it to a minimum. Thinking about how you can get out of that relationship for good, even in the long term, is very well worth your time.

Jellybeansme
30-12-2015, 09:31 AM
Hi,

I think I can relate to your situation. I've been surrounded by emotional vampires my whole life. I broke all ties with them except for one relationship I need to keep vaguely alive for the sake of someone else. I can barely stand reading her emails. I try to just look for the important elements while not actually reading, otherwise they can mess with my mind for days.


First of all, are you absolutely sure you can't get out of this relationship?

If you can't, you need to put the maximum distance between you and her.


Based on my experience, here's my advice for when you have to interact with her:

When she talks to you, let her talk but don't get invested in the conversation unless you need to. Don't start conversations, and, very important, do not talk about yourself. Refrain from sharing anything you're going through, anything that bothers you, anything you do or think, anything your neighbor's dog did yesterday... Anything. If you need to talk, talk to someone else.
If she asks, you need to make your replies as short and vague as you can. It's probable she'll hardly notice. If she insists, paraphrase your previous reply and then ask her something about herself.

Never complain about anything. Always be positive, happy, assertive. Praise her. Seem interested in what she says even if you're not. If she seems to complain about something, look like you deeply emphasize with her while saying close to nothing. Nod or paraphrase her.

If she's anything like my vampires, you hardly even need to really listen to what she says, just give her the reaction she looks like she's waiting for. Don't start her on any topic, make your conversations as short as you can. Leave as soon as you can. When you leave, refrain from giving her an explanation why you have to leave. You have to leave, that's all she needs to know.

The less you give her, the less power she has on you. You just need to pretend. Don't worry about looking like a hypocrite. From my experience, vampires don't notice because they don't have empathy and they don't care about you. They'll never waste any second of their precious time putting themselves in your shoes. All they care about is what they get from you: praise and control. As long as you feed them that illusion, you're fine.


Even if you do all that, being around them is still exhausting. But at least you keep it to a minimum. Thinking about how you can get out of that relationship for good, even in the long term, is very well worth your time.

This is one that unfortunately I cannot irradiate forever as she has married into the family .. Been with us for 10 years lol .. I will try this.. Thank you :hug2: