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WhiteWarrior
28-11-2015, 11:55 PM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.

naturesflow
29-11-2015, 12:07 AM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.

Trust in myself is a deepening process that lets go naturally through what I feel that creates resistance to what I do not wish to resist..

Building trust in myself imo, allows me to build a deeper grounding in living my life regardless of what is happening outside of me. This kind of trust listens and discerns and knows how to be in the world in trust naturally...What is happening out there is about others, but how I respond is about me...

knightofalbion
29-11-2015, 12:10 AM
If you want to know if you can trust someone, trust them. You'll soon find out!

But everyone should be able to trust 'you'. That is the important thing.

Clover
29-11-2015, 02:26 AM
If you want to know if you can trust someone, trust them. You'll soon find out!

But everyone should be able to trust 'you'. That is the important thing.
well said.

Trust is a high level form of intimacy for me, once it's broken, betrayed or ridiculed, I am not open to forgetting. I am pretty stone cold with accepting anyone back in my space. That saying, treat others the way you want them to treat you, simple but true.

I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.
I trust my dad 110% He has never failed me. He was a solid hard working and honest person. I am very grateful to have been raised and influenced by him.

Inika
29-11-2015, 04:22 AM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.

I read something today that said there is no reality, only your perception of it.
This is said in regards to your view of the world as nasty.

To trust someone or not is up to you. You can't control if they betray that trust or not. You learn from everyone you come across in life. Given ego is not preventing you from opening up a little and to become vulnerable enough to trust in another.
Look at the word trust, what does that mean to you?
If we're all spiritual beings living in a physical existence then maybe trust is one of the major lessons of living in a physical existence. Does our spirit grow from trust and betrayal or do we stay stuck in an infantile spirit that learns nothing thanks to fears.

Shivani Devi
29-11-2015, 07:57 AM
In a world where there are so many scams, con-artists, deception and fraud due to greed, it's hard to know who to 'trust' and mistrust seems to have reached epidemic proportions.

It has to do with our innate nature to overgeneralise based on what society presents to us or certain bad experiences we've had in the past.

There are a lot of examples of this:

"Do not trust what the media tells you because they all have a biased network view".

"Do not trust people who are 'psychic' because they'll just take advantage of your naivete or gullibility for their financial gain".

"Do not trust religions as they'll only try and brainwash you and lead you into delusion".

On and on this goes...

In the end, it has become a form of social indoctrination not to trust anything without rational, skeptical and scientific inquiry and this is at the total detriment of what is being 'trusted' in the first place.

I guess it all depends on what you are trusting them with.

If it has anything to do with money, I trust no-one.
If it has anything to do with 'keeping a secret' - the same applies.

If it has anything to do with spirituality, I'll just listen.

Trust all depends on what circumstances lead up to the trust and what you are trusting that person with.

Gem
29-11-2015, 08:31 AM
We learn to be discerning.

Shaunc
29-11-2015, 10:07 AM
If you want to know if you can trust someone, trust them. You'll soon find out!

But everyone should be able to trust 'you'. That is the important thing.

I'd have to agree with this. Having said that I'd be inclined to initially trust with small things and over time build up.
It's good to trust but it's smart to box clever.

Belle
29-11-2015, 10:16 AM
We all get it wrong, we all make mistakes.

But, my adult life has been shaped by an inability to trust myself or others. Childhood abuse has shaped me and I'm drawn to trusting people who don't have the best interests for me. Perversely. It's common with people who have been abused, those who are not to be trusted create a known energy - which whilst not being healthy is familiar and therefore workable with. I feel less safe with people I can trust.

sky
29-11-2015, 10:33 AM
Building up trust in others can take years, losing it takes seconds and sometimes forever to repair.

Thunder Bow
29-11-2015, 04:26 PM
Being Cynical is one thing, seeing and understanding is another. Trust your own heart. Seek to understand and not judge out of being Cynical. Avoid hot button emotional reactions and judgments based in cynical negativity. If you keep your heart and eyes open you will know who and what to trust,or not trust.

Mr Interesting
02-12-2015, 07:07 PM
I know that trust is a word and we have some understanding of it but I still, in a growing part of me, have no real idea what it means... even whilst I do.

I go where I go and what happens happens and I must admit that the most simple things are completely amazing. I did find an axe a few weeks back and knew straight away it was a beautiful thing and held it like it was a new baby, a strong and vital thing that would have a great life, and when I got home I finally looked closely at it and it was from my homeland far across the seas, two homelands even, as the words on it went to another homeland and it was like all those gifts I come to... even while I try not to question a worthiness it seems I am adored.

But of these people what goes out in front of me seems a wave they keep away from but for the ones I like there is and never was a wave at all. What is that?... because it seems to be, and the crashing and the jolting are always just noise on the horizons.

I'm kinda noticing at the moment the weeds all around me and they are supposedly the baddy ones, they eat up and take all the goodie ones, but then too there are many bees and these people who want the bees but don't want the weeds don't seem to have any bees. This then means to me that the weeds are good because the bees like them so I then have many weeds. Do I trust what I see? Not really but not because there isn't a trust in the sense of what trust is but more that if there is such a thing as trust it can look after itself. But I do feel there is a trust in the weeds and the bees and the axes and the people I meet, a willingness even, to just meet quietly and wonder... what is trust?

yeshee camar
02-12-2015, 08:08 PM
i just wanna do the edible mess me up by writing my chuck to say, that.
'was not meet up to gorrilen bad - for good or woe.'
that were pleaser captain huge phat ego pelate dishon mery yawn boar
delicioused 'be glad tug the trust.'
---- ---- ---- ----
minus well retire from barking on missing tooth, -
cause were going to beat all that from others w/ buckle settle up
that got it clean brute chemics shavens going post on.
gorrilen bad -ie tough given w/ people - sillying up.

( :biggrin: :smile:

O
02-12-2015, 10:18 PM
Building up trust in others can take years, losing it takes seconds and sometimes forever to repair.
Sad, but true.

And to answer the op's question...I trust myself.

Native spirit
02-12-2015, 10:33 PM
Have to agree with Thunder Bow he is correct

Namaste

Gem
03-12-2015, 08:27 AM
Building up trust in others can take years, losing it takes seconds and sometimes forever to repair.

Tru dat .

Sarian
03-12-2015, 01:24 PM
I have one best friend that I trust with my life. I've known her 30 plus years. She's the best. The man in my life, I wish I could say I trusted but maybe 80 to 85 percent only because he's shattered the trust in the past and it's very hard to get it back. It did rise higher but ah, I see I really do not trust even 90 percent. I feel the same about what you feel, although there are things in life that just make me enjoy life, but when I look around at what others do or are doing or have done to the planet and to each other, yeah, it's hard to feel trustful of others. I have seen people throw best friends under the bus just to make themselves feel important or any number of reasons...betray a friend's confidence. I have a SIL who thought nothing of betraying my trust although I should have known better. I have no answers for you really. My lack of trust for others is there but that said, I'm pretty friendly and sometimes like an open book and will talk about myself or answer questions if asked, but if I have something I want to keep to myself, I know better to put it out there to anyone or depend on anyone for anything. Pretty sad.

Why do I trust the one friend? The history we've had. I know what I say to her is kept secret. I know what she says is kept to me. She would not hurt me in anyway yet, will tell me what I need to know (if I'm being unreasonable regarding any issue) Trust takes time and testing the waters. I know her character and integrity and it's great. I think I can sense in some people that they have good integrity and honorable. She possesses these traits. She's not out to get anything from me, use me. We became best friends instantly. We saw something in each other. I have another dear friend, I trust her mostly but I hold out some simply because she has a large amount of friends and I listen to her talk about them and I think I would not like her discussing me to them.

Lucyan28
03-12-2015, 04:24 PM
We should only trust in the people who is worth it.

At the beginning all people is worth it, is in the daily basis that we notice either who is worth it or who is Not worth it =)

I wouldn't trust my personal live to a very talkative person if you know what I mean =)

Jatd
03-12-2015, 04:52 PM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.


I think trusting someone comes with expectations. Through the years I have learned that by having expectations of someone we will almost always be let down.

The following things allow me to put trust into a very few:

-Openness and honesty, allowing vulnerability to be a part of our relationship/friendship

-Knowing that I am never alone

-knowing that I am loved beyond this earthly love

I hope this helps a little. To trust someone else, we have to learn to trust ourselves. Trust that we can be understand and forgiving.

Rokon
03-12-2015, 04:59 PM
Its getting harder and harder to stay open and trusting with others. Sign of the times. I would like to completely trust my heart but it not so black and white. How many times has heart been wrong?

loopylucid
04-12-2015, 11:13 AM
I adopted the approach of, I trust you, to be exactly what you are.
I trust myself to be exactly what i am and bare responsibility for that always.

In the middle, you cant guarntee me anything, except the moment were in right now, the real trust and truth held is what is happening at the moment it is created, as i see it.

There isnt or doesnt seem to be one universal truth that encompasses all perceptions of what trust is or looks like, what its circumstances are.
There isnt it seems one interpretation of an act that all witness the same either, just makes me wonder when we speak about trust, if we really know what it is exacty were entrusting who with?

Loopy

O
04-12-2015, 11:40 AM
There isnt or doesnt seem to be one universal truth that encompasses all perceptions of what trust is or looks like, what its circumstances are.
There isnt it seems one interpretation of an act that all witness the same either, just makes me wonder when we speak about trust, if we really know what it is exacty were entrusting who with?

Loopy

Good point.

Touched
06-12-2015, 04:30 PM
I trust everything to be itself. I'm never disappointed.

What most people understand to be 'trust' is really a form of self-promotion and control. "Can I trust this person" readily translates to "Can I hold this person accountable to my own personal priorities and agenda." That's not to say I condemn that outlook, there certainly is a time and a place for such an expectation - but don't fool yourself that it is just about the other person.

7luminaries
06-12-2015, 05:10 PM
Touched, what you say is appropriate to 95% of the world we see today.

But within our circle of friends, within our circle of belonging, then "can I trust this person?" translates to "do we love one another authentically as people and as friends, where we both seek the highest good of the other equally to our own?"

Authentic loves desires and seeks the best for the other. These are our beloved friends and family (both chosen and inherited). I believe it is the way of the future, because it is the way of who we are at our integrated centre, at our integrated core.

The more transparent this entire evaluation process is, the better.
One day, I believe we will knock that 95% down to a much lower figure...as more and more of us understand that this is the best way to maximise joy and satisfaction for all.
That is, that the way of authentic love is most resonant and right-aligned with who we are at centre. Not just for me at your expense, or vice versa.

Until then, I agree we need to continually strive to see more objectively, to see reality more truly as it is. To first see and know reality more truly and then, as you say, to trust everything to be itself.

Peace & blessings,
7L

loopylucid
07-12-2015, 09:32 AM
But within our circle of friends, within our circle of belonging, then "can I trust this person?" translates to "do we love one another authentically as people and as friends, where we both seek the highest good of the other equally to our own?"

Authentic loves desires and seeks the best for the other. These are our beloved friends and family (both chosen and inherited). I believe it is the way of the future, because it is the way of who we are at our integrated centre, at our integrated core.


7L

Curious With this then how it feels to you, if i treat myself pretty badly but what i percieve as in my highest good, regardless of others opinions I see it as my truth, does that mean my highest good for you, although equal to my own, but not necessarily alligned with yours, is a misplace of your trust? even if in my current understanding it is authentic love for myself? I think this is were a lot of confusion can often rear its head being a subjective point of perception determined by current understandings, is a wide open platter of potential lol
Loopy

Touched
08-12-2015, 02:42 PM
I adopted the approach of, I trust you, to be exactly what you are.
I trust myself to be exactly what i am and bare responsibility for that always.


*Bows to Loopy*

loopylucid
09-12-2015, 08:58 AM
*Bows to Loopy*

lol, it doesn't work for everyone, but its the only way forward for me.

Good to meet your acquaintance again touched :tongue:

Loopy

Jyotir
09-12-2015, 04:56 PM
Hello WhiteWarrior,

The following text makes over 30 references* to the subject of “trust”, in defining and explaining in terms of spiritual practice, including within the chapter indicated below which members may find useful.


Letters on Yoga II, VOLUME 29 in The Complete Works of Sri Aurobindo
Available here at this link (http://www.sriaurobindoashram.org/ashram/sriauro/writings.php) free of charge for personal use in PDF format.

Scroll down to Vol. 29 (Letters on Yoga II), open and see:

Chapter Eight: Faith
Faith, Belief, Confidence, Trust……..pg 88


* After opening the PDF file,
one may search for any word or phrase by
going to the pull down menu for 'EDIT', and then
selecting either 'FIND' or 'ADVANCED SEARCH'.
===================

additionally, at another resource which (imo) has proven itself to be valuable...

A site search for the word 'trust' returned over 300 results,
including numerous aphorisms on the subject as related to spirituality here
at (link) Sri Chinmoy Library, search='trust' (http://www.srichinmoylibrary.com/search/site/trust)


Hope this is helpful.

~ J

7luminaries
11-12-2015, 01:11 AM
Curious With this then how it feels to you, if i treat myself pretty badly but what i percieve as in my highest good, regardless of others opinions I see it as my truth, does that mean my highest good for you, although equal to my own, but not necessarily alligned with yours, is a misplace of your trust? even if in my current understanding it is authentic love for myself? I think this is were a lot of confusion can often rear its head being a subjective point of perception determined by current understandings, is a wide open platter of potential lol
Loopy
Yes that is what it means :D

Using "you" and "me" purely as objective parties...

If you (let's say) perceive exploitation of me (let's say), even if you conveniently perceive it to be "mutual" exploitation (all as defined by you) to be in my highest and best interests, then you have betrayed my trust. Or...if you are abusive, or cruel, or unkind, etc., then you have betrayed my trust.

Bottom line is that my highest good as a human being has not been honoured. In fact, you have no idea if I mutually seek to exploit you (or to mutually be abusive, cruel, or unkind, etc.). Rather, you say that I do and you believe that I do -- not because it's so, but simply because it's a conveniently amoral assumption for you to make. It doesn't require you truly take time to know me or value me or my best interests. Whilst I may be approaching you honorably and have no framework to even consider or imagine your entire premise (that we are mutually exploiting, dishonouring, or abusing one another).

It may well be that you cannot honour me and my interests until you honour yourself properly. It's very true that you may not be able to discern whether seeking after your immediate wants & desires truly aligns with your higher good. Meaning, what is right-aligned with spirit.

But it may equally simply be that you choose not to honour mine, because it suits you to do so in order to first and foremost get what you need. Far more commonly, your highest good is (and even must be, as you see it) exclusive or or dismissive of mine partially or entirely...and that is the more prevalent issue.

From the other side then as well, far more commonly, my highest good is ignored or dismissed, whilst I seek to provide for your wants and demands. Perhaps my assumption is that you will care for and value me and what nurtures me in turn...but if your world revolves primarily around you at my expense, then I am sorely mistaken. You can switch "you" and "me" around - it's the same issues either way.

It doesn't matter where we're at. We're responsible for all of it, nonetheless. Not just for what we've done to ourselves.
But equally for what we've done to others.

And this is why, with emotional/spiritual growth and maturity, we feel the stirrings of shame, sorrow and grief, remorse, contrition, and a desire for repentance and reconciliation. We feel the need to build or restore trust. Trust that we have broken, used badly, or neglected.

Of course, and quite tragically, this may take years. Or lifetimes. Or aeons. Trust left in disrepair over lifetimes requires great strength, love, and courage on all sides...no one can do it alone. If your trust, love, and kindness is met with abuse, cruelty, or exploitation, then you may have to allow lifetimes or aeons to pass.

But there is no other way forward. Eventually, those that have betrayed your trust may come to a better place, and perhaps they will seek to build and nourish trust with those they meet -- if not now, then in some other lifetime, or in aeons hence. And when that time comes, they will still need to work through the shame, sorrow, remorse, and so forth, that comes from treating another sentient being as less than, as worthless or of little worth, or as a means to some end.

Peace & blessings,
7L

starling
11-12-2015, 03:02 AM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.



Tue enough, I just trusted the wrong person and came off very badly.

I agree we live in such a selfish world now, so many people just seem to have the wrong attitude.

I trust my folks a fair way.

My sister and brother now I guess more as they recently backed me up o some thing important.

One or two others I work with.



This recent incident (the first one) has shaken my belief in humanity quite a way..

loopylucid
11-12-2015, 09:54 AM
Thanks for sharing your view there, it fascinates me how people see things, especially if one party is completely unaware and how that responsibility is still defined by another s views anyway.
nice diverse universe we inhabit :)

Loopy

Yes that is what it means :D

Using "you" and "me" purely as objective parties...

If you (let's say) perceive exploitation of me (let's say), even if you conveniently perceive it to be "mutual" exploitation (all as defined by you) to be in my highest and best interests, then you have betrayed my trust. Or...if you are abusive, or cruel, or unkind, etc., then you have betrayed my trust.

Bottom line is that my highest good as a human being has not been honoured. In fact, you have no idea if I mutually seek to exploit you (or to mutually be abusive, cruel, or unkind, etc.). Rather, you say that I do and you believe that I do -- not because it's so, but simply because it's a conveniently amoral assumption for you to make. It doesn't require you truly take time to know me or value me or my best interests. Whilst I may be approaching you honorably and have no framework to even consider or imagine your entire premise (that we are mutually exploiting, dishonouring, or abusing one another).

It may well be that you cannot honour me and my interests until you honour yourself properly. It's very true that you may not be able to discern whether seeking after your immediate wants & desires truly aligns with your higher good. Meaning, what is right-aligned with spirit.

But it may equally simply be that you choose not to honour mine, because it suits you to do so in order to first and foremost get what you need. Far more commonly, your highest good is (and even must be, as you see it) exclusive or or dismissive of mine partially or entirely...and that is the more prevalent issue.

From the other side then as well, far more commonly, my highest good is ignored or dismissed, whilst I seek to provide for your wants and demands. Perhaps my assumption is that you will care for and value me and what nurtures me in turn...but if your world revolves primarily around you at my expense, then I am sorely mistaken. You can switch "you" and "me" around - it's the same issues either way.

It doesn't matter where we're at. We're responsible for all of it, nonetheless. Not just for what we've done to ourselves.
But equally for what we've done to others.

And this is why, with emotional/spiritual growth and maturity, we feel the stirrings of shame, sorrow and grief, remorse, contrition, and a desire for repentance and reconciliation. We feel the need to build or restore trust. Trust that we have broken, used badly, or neglected.

Of course, and quite tragically, this may take years. Or lifetimes. Or aeons. Trust left in disrepair over lifetimes requires great strength, love, and courage on all sides...no one can do it alone. If your trust, love, and kindness is met with abuse, cruelty, or exploitation, then you may have to allow lifetimes or aeons to pass.

But there is no other way forward. Eventually, those that have betrayed your trust may come to a better place, and perhaps they will seek to build and nourish trust with those they meet -- if not now, then in some other lifetime, or in aeons hence. And when that time comes, they will still need to work through the shame, sorrow, remorse, and so forth, that comes from treating another sentient being as less than, as worthless or of little worth, or as a means to some end.

Peace & blessings,
7L

7luminaries
12-12-2015, 06:37 PM
Yes, it's a gradual process and everyone is one their own timeline.

A lack of awareness doesn't absolve you of responsibility to yourself and others, however. It simply means that one who isn't aware may not be recognising or accepting of their responsibility to the highest good for both self and others, equally.

It's a bit similar (poor analogy but let's roll with it) to living or even driving under the influence. We may do all manner of things whilst under the influence, such as acting out, assaulting others, or perhaps injuring or killing them behind the wheel. We may have vague, very little, or even no recollection of our actions, much less of our motivations or our triggers. If we do recall them later, we may have very little ability to sort our motives or our inner workings.

It is very difficult to effectively take responsibility for our actions when we are living without awareness or clarity. And yet we are still responsible for our actions. When we are ready to take responsibility for our journey, we can begin to move past the denial, anger, and hostility...through the shame, remorse, repentance and into the desire for truth and growth...and then into a place of acceptance, responsibility, reconciliation, and healing.

When is a person ready? When the desire for truth, integrity and growth in Spirit (or, within oneself) is stronger than the desire to continue living without these core aspects of existence. For some, it may be ages before they have both the desire to seek and the humility to accept or receive.

Sometimes, we are unable to fully reconcile with others due to our past actions, or theirs, or due to past traumas on either side which present obstacles to growth and reconciliation. Sometimes the obstacles may be unrelated to the situation at hand and yet present obstacles. This is fairly common. We often do not understand where the cruelty, unkindness, hostility or aggression, lack of empathy, amoral behaviour, or narcissism in others comes from. The love, support, and friendship we may offer may be abused or disregarded, and we may not ever understand where such behaviour originates or why it was perpetrated.

Nonetheless, it is still honourable and good to approach each situation with an authentic love which seeks the highest good for both self and others, regardless of the specific outcomes in any particular place and time.

Someone at work recently mentioned they were reminded that there is no expiration date on integrity. Nor on authentic love, nor on ever more fully becoming who we are at core.

Peace & blessings :hug3:
7L

Shinsoo
12-12-2015, 11:48 PM
I am by nature, a pretty open person with others--but trust is hard to get out of me.

I find it interesting, as for the most part, I grew up in a very stable, loving, compassionate family, who would not go out of their way to hurt another family member.

I think some of it had to do with being molested once when I was about ten years old and very ignorant. My sis found my cousin fooling around with me, and told mother. Mother then told me to keep quiet about it, and from that moment I found it hard to be close to them all. My cousin never tried it again, and I don't think he's actually a pedophile--he has a wife and two cute kids who seem to be well adjusted. I think he was more curious if anything.

Trust got harder and harder to gain with me over the years as I was bullied, made fun of, and teased. That said, when I trust someone, my skills are pretty good at deciding who I can trust with things. Like my first bf whom I sent naked pervy shots of myself to, never once seen them on the internet. And my current best friend has never betrayed me.

I hope to regain some of that trust during the rest of this lifetime. I see it as a vital aspect to humanity--we all, as humans are social creatures, we often need to talk to others about things that are sensitive--stuff that needs to get off our shoulders. Without trust, there would be a lot of bottled up emotions, thoughts, and feelings--I shudder to think what a bunch of emotionally closed off humans could do to each other.

Gem
13-12-2015, 12:17 AM
I trust everything to be itself. I'm never disappointed.

What most people understand to be 'trust' is really a form of self-promotion and control. "Can I trust this person" readily translates to "Can I hold this person accountable to my own personal priorities and agenda." That's not to say I condemn that outlook, there certainly is a time and a place for such an expectation - but don't fool yourself that it is just about the other person.

I think we discern who to trust or not, not because they need meet our agenda, but because we know from experience that there are those who take advantage in promoting their own agenda.

loopylucid
13-12-2015, 04:56 PM
Thanks for sharing your views, its not I want to add or subtract from them, its more people research I do, so nothing to add, just cheers for sharing how you feel :)

loopy

Yes, it's a gradual process and everyone is one their own timeline.

A lack of awareness doesn't absolve you of responsibility to yourself and others, however. It simply means that one who isn't aware may not be recognising or accepting of their responsibility to the highest good for both self and others, equally.

It's a bit similar (poor analogy but let's roll with it) to living or even driving under the influence. We may do all manner of things whilst under the influence, such as acting out, assaulting others, or perhaps injuring or killing them behind the wheel. We may have vague, very little, or even no recollection of our actions, much less of our motivations or our triggers. If we do recall them later, we may have very little ability to sort our motives or our inner workings.

It is very difficult to effectively take responsibility for our actions when we are living without awareness or clarity. And yet we are still responsible for our actions. When we are ready to take responsibility for our journey, we can begin to move past the denial, anger, and hostility...through the shame, remorse, repentance and into the desire for truth and growth...and then into a place of acceptance, responsibility, reconciliation, and healing.

When is a person ready? When the desire for truth, integrity and growth in Spirit (or, within oneself) is stronger than the desire to continue living without these core aspects of existence. For some, it may be ages before they have both the desire to seek and the humility to accept or receive.

Sometimes, we are unable to fully reconcile with others due to our past actions, or theirs, or due to past traumas on either side which present obstacles to growth and reconciliation. Sometimes the obstacles may be unrelated to the situation at hand and yet present obstacles. This is fairly common. We often do not understand where the cruelty, unkindness, hostility or aggression, lack of empathy, amoral behaviour, or narcissism in others comes from. The love, support, and friendship we may offer may be abused or disregarded, and we may not ever understand where such behaviour originates or why it was perpetrated.

Nonetheless, it is still honourable and good to approach each situation with an authentic love which seeks the highest good for both self and others, regardless of the specific outcomes in any particular place and time.

Someone at work recently mentioned they were reminded that there is no expiration date on integrity. Nor on authentic love, nor on ever more fully becoming who we are at core.

Peace & blessings :hug3:
7L

Touched
13-12-2015, 11:32 PM
I think we discern who to trust or not, not because they need meet our agenda, but because we know from experience that there are those who take advantage in promoting their own agenda.

Quite agree. That would, after all, not be our agenda. :smile:

The Taoist
15-12-2015, 10:38 PM
Hello' White Warrior:





Rather than offer you stories of trust, conjecture or opinion, I will offer you a more 'direct' view, that of intuitively looking into your 'energy patterns' to see what is the source of your dis-trust in life.

Now, what appears is that...listening to your intuitive voice shall be more effective than listening to your ego or 'thinking' voice. This may offer you hints of which direction you may be choosing.

What is clear is that you are not trusting of yourself. Do not look to other individuals and their belief systems, their judgments and their evaluations upon your choices. Merely focus on trusting yourself. And in this trusting of self, you will not be creating conflict within self.

Therefore, in trusting of self you are not directing your attention to other individuals’ belief systems.

You confuse yourself when you are looking outside of yourself White Warrior, for in looking outside of yourself, you are looking through the filtration of other individuals’ belief systems, and this causes you confusion and conflict. Therefore, trust your own voice and listen to your own language to yourself.

If you are looking to self, if you are opening to experience and listening to you, you shall offer yourself impressions in very physically focused manners of which direction that you should be moving into or that you are wishing to be moving into, and you shall confirm this to yourself simply by listening to yourself. You hold the answers already.

You appear to have an imbalance, and this perpetuates your questioning of yourself, that you move in the direction of your thought process and your rationality and your logic and your questioning and your analyzation. And in all of this thought activity, you are ignoring this small inner voice which motivates you, and you question that motivation, for you have learned well not to be trusting of self, for it is untrustworthy.

Therefore, let me suggest to you that each time you are battling with yourself, allow yourself a moment of quietness to focus upon your language to yourself, your inner voice which motivates you, and in this afford yourself the opportunity to question, that in how shall it be harmful to you? For you shall not be harmful to you if you are listening to you. You shall be harmful to yourself if you are moving in the direction of your influences of your belief systems which stem from outside of yourself.

Now, what I am suggesting to you is that, you do create what you choose to create, but you also align with other individuals’ judgments and you often subsequently place judgments upon yourself.

It is a choice.

Practicing daily, a form of meditation where you are 'affirming' your “Trust in self” can have beneficial results, if done with total intent & focus. And most importantly....”Self-Acceptance”.


I hope this insight benefits you and I wish you well in your inner adventures.



Best Wishes, Taoist

iorek65
16-12-2015, 01:34 AM
Trust has for me become a scarce and valuable property. I see the world as a pretty nasty place and giving trust to anyone is very hard for me. I would like to hear who you guys trust, and in particular I wish to hear WHY you trust them.

I know one person (A Qi Gong/Martial Arts Instructor) who takes the perspective that he can't trust anybody--he can only trust himself to deal with them.

I perceive it as we are responsible for the trust we place and the degree--to the degree someone we trust deviates from our expectations is error on our part and something we have to accept responsibility for.

Actions are the basis of trust--particularly repeating ones. Life is full of cycles--both good and bad actions will repeat in cycles (unless one digs deep inside his/herself to witness the internal cycles and affect them--those are unique and very rare people). If we choose to place deep trust in our analysis before we understand the deeper behavioral cycles at play in someone we alone are responsible.

The errors in judgments I've made previously include catching wind in advance of a negative cycle present in someone that won't happen until certain conditions trigger it but trusting anyway because of what seemed like highly positive benefits in the near term. Nobody is responsible for that judgment but me.

iorek65
16-12-2015, 01:40 AM
Yes, it's a gradual process and everyone is one their own timeline.

A lack of awareness doesn't absolve you of responsibility to yourself and others, however. It simply means that one who isn't aware may not be recognising or accepting of their responsibility to the highest good for both self and others, equally.

It's a bit similar (poor analogy but let's roll with it) to living or even driving under the influence. We may do all manner of things whilst under the influence, such as acting out, assaulting others, or perhaps injuring or killing them behind the wheel. We may have vague, very little, or even no recollection of our actions, much less of our motivations or our triggers. If we do recall them later, we may have very little ability to sort our motives or our inner workings.

It is very difficult to effectively take responsibility for our actions when we are living without awareness or clarity. And yet we are still responsible for our actions. When we are ready to take responsibility for our journey, we can begin to move past the denial, anger, and hostility...through the shame, remorse, repentance and into the desire for truth and growth...and then into a place of acceptance, responsibility, reconciliation, and healing.

When is a person ready? When the desire for truth, integrity and growth in Spirit (or, within oneself) is stronger than the desire to continue living without these core aspects of existence. For some, it may be ages before they have both the desire to seek and the humility to accept or receive.

Sometimes, we are unable to fully reconcile with others due to our past actions, or theirs, or due to past traumas on either side which present obstacles to growth and reconciliation. Sometimes the obstacles may be unrelated to the situation at hand and yet present obstacles. This is fairly common. We often do not understand where the cruelty, unkindness, hostility or aggression, lack of empathy, amoral behaviour, or narcissism in others comes from. The love, support, and friendship we may offer may be abused or disregarded, and we may not ever understand where such behaviour originates or why it was perpetrated.

Nonetheless, it is still honourable and good to approach each situation with an authentic love which seeks the highest good for both self and others, regardless of the specific outcomes in any particular place and time.

Someone at work recently mentioned they were reminded that there is no expiration date on integrity. Nor on authentic love, nor on ever more fully becoming who we are at core.

Peace & blessings :hug3:
7L
Yes, yes, and more yes.

"Keep doing good"

What's better than doing good? Consistently doing good.