Protecting against a Threesome!

[Raven Poet]

Hi there. I've looked thru this section and can't seem to find a thread related to my situation ... so I would like to ask you folks who are more experienced in energy work than me for some help, please. (I`m also posting this in "relationships" section.)

When my husband and I are around this couple who are "friends" of ours, I shrink and disappear. It actually feels like, in my body, that I am shrinking and floating away and disappearing. I know I am not physically, because they still see me (sometimes), so this is happening on an energetic level.

I would say this couple are more my husband's friends than mine. I used to work with the woman, we were friends, then she underwent a huge weight loss transformation and her personality has changed. So has her lifestyle. And I don't feel comfortable around her anymore. But my husband enjoys them - he talks and laughs and has a good ole time. Not me.

This energetic shrinking happens only when the three of them are together. Is there something about their threesome that forms some huge energy that deflates and disconnects me/my energy???

I've talked to my husband about my growing discomfort around this couple; how I feel invisible and ignored and insignificant. But he doesn't understand.

And now we are supposed to go for dinner at their house in two days ... and I am FULL of dread.

On one hand I want to honour my husband's obvious enjoyment of their company ... on the other hand it is quite unpleasant to shrink and disappear.

I would welcome some ideas of ways I can prepare so I can stay in my body, stay the same "size", and stay present when we go there on Saturday. If any of you have any ideas or strategies to share, I would be very grateful. Thank you!!!

[wstein]

This energetic shrinking happens only when the three of them are together. Is there something about their threesome that forms some huge energy that deflates and disconnects me/my energy??? This sounds about right. However, one should take a long hard look for some internal psychological 'issue' within you. For example (not to be taken as YOUR answer), one might be jealous that your husband has close friends and you don't or that he is spending more quality time with them than you.

As deal with such situations:
Best would be to find a way communicate the level of distress to your husband and avoid the situation all together.

A way to get through such situations when they are unavoidable is as follows. Just before going/arriving, pump huge amounts of energy into your aura until it literally oozes out. There are many ways to do this.

One way if you know some kind of energy healing technique or how to make psiballs is to hold your hands facing and about a foot from your torso, palms flat, fingers splayed wide and do your energy technique. Done correctly, energy will come out your palms and fill the space between your hand and your torso. As more gets pumped in, it will continue to flow all around your body, filling your aura. If fully charged this can protect you from social and family situations for several hours. If you find it weakening, excuse yourself, go somewhere to be alone (bathroom) and repeat above.

[Raven Poet]

Hi, wstein. Thanks for replying.

I did have a good talk with my husband after they left. It helped; he still doesn't quite understand or sense the energy shifts like I do, but at least he's empathetic to it.

I wish I could enjoy a friendship with them like my husband does for his sake. But I don't want to change who or what I am just to "fit in". (Did that as a teenager, never want to be that empty again!) And I get the sense that who/what I am just isn't that interesting to them. They like travel and dinner parties and material acquisitions; I like my little home and simple quiet life, including getting to know my spirit more.

Is this jealousy? I don't know what I could be jealous of - I feel content with the loving friendships I am blessed with. I don't have many, but the ones I have are with openhearted loving people who have similar interests and who give me the sense they appreciate me as I am. I will think about this more though.

Hee hee, I didn't know what a "psi ball" was, so I googled it. Found a site that I related to; practiced forming a psi ball, then passed it over my dog. He responded to the energy! That was interesting to see it work when I just found out what it was.

I think I will use this strategy to prepare before going there for dinner. And like you said - if it gets to the point where it's too uncomfortable, then I'll just pass on future invitations to socialize with them. Thanks!

[CJ82Sky]

Great advice - and to add to that, I'd consider doing a protection/grounding meditation for yourself so that you are prepared before you go over. This will both help keep you "rooted" in who you are, with the help of earth and root energies, coupled with protection to keep you from feeling vulnerable.

I don't get the sense that there is anything malicious going on, but just that for some reason, their security in the three of their friendship brings out and triggers old insecurities in yourself and/or your relationship on a level that is far deeper - and harder to identify or understand - than something as simple or obvious as jealousy.

If you fill yourself with love and light for YOU, and who you are, and all the wonderful things that make you, YOU, I get the sense that this other couple will start to see you for who you are and all of your greatness - even if it is not the same traits that they typically value or are in sync with their own personalities.

Once you earn their respect from the inside out, I think you will then also find that they are not ignoring you or draining you and you are not shrinking or invisible, but that rather you can be a part of social outings with your husband and they will shift the way they see you. From that small, shrinking, "simple," to quite, strong, and secure in your quietness. Like a pillar that stands tall and silent, I believe that is how they will start to see you, because I can see that in you too, yet I can also see how in situations outside of your comfort zone you shrink within yourself. For some reason, with this other couple you seem to shrink even further as if their energy pushes you down (though I don't believe that is their intention).

Think of yourself as a pillar, or a grand oak tree - tall and quiet, at peace at home with the sun and the sky and the rain and nature without the need for material things - and then see how others start to react to your new pillar of strength!