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View Full Version : Pause, think and then send or open your mouth


froebellian
13-06-2014, 01:28 PM
I came across an interesting FB posting
' If you choose to have a closed mind, please choose to have a closed mouth as well.'
Recently I switched off my mobile phone because of the distractions, part of the Hermit thing. I can get over people trying to contact me because I don't need to contact them and I check my email when I want to and answer when I am ready.

I have found people are too eager to press the send button on a text or on an email or even a forum and people have lost their jobs sending emails or texts to the wrong people. Society is too eager and don't realize the consequences of their actions. So think before you open your mouth or hit send as you may offend, upset, damage reputations and I feel IMHO is upsets the equilibrium on the planet.

I find this more when people are angry and vent and rant at people, whilst it is normal and human to be frustrated, it does send out negative vibrations to all when its in a text/email/voicemail etc so yes the edit button is useful here but also what harm does it do to others.
Nasty emails and voicemails the equivalent to poison pen letters create a whole layers of negativity now in the realm.

So as the saying goes, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything; but work it out in a journal or word it so that you are turning a negative into a positive ( or try to)

Froe

Michelle11
14-06-2014, 02:26 PM
I haven't come across it too much in my personal life but have heard countless stories about people being cruel to others on the web because it is anonymous not thinking how damaging the things they are saying can be to the person the cruelty was directed at. It is very important to think before you react though it can be hard. I have always personally tried to make it a point to not respond when I am in anger but wait until I have calmed down. But I also try to not take it personal when it is directed at me. But it does seem as though the internet has opened up a world where people are not cognizant of the consequences. But I guess that is kind of the point of human life. To learn the consequences of our actions.

Baile
14-06-2014, 02:34 PM
Recently I switched off my mobile phone because of the distractions, part of the Hermit thing.Go hermits! I haven't had a phone in over four years, either in my home or on my person. Skype phone service, 30 bucks a year. The peace of not having to hear a phone ring is my version of heaven.

Goes for threads as well. Someone started a thread the other day: Why do you believe in reincarnation? The second post in: "I don't..." and that was the entire message. And you opened your mouth/typed that, why?

blackraven
22-06-2014, 07:49 PM
I came across an interesting FB posting
' If you choose to have a closed mind, please choose to have a closed mouth as well.'
Recently I switched off my mobile phone because of the distractions, part of the Hermit thing. I can get over people trying to contact me because I don't need to contact them and I check my email when I want to and answer when I am ready.

I have found people are too eager to press the send button on a text or on an email or even a forum and people have lost their jobs sending emails or texts to the wrong people. Society is too eager and don't realize the consequences of their actions. So think before you open your mouth or hit send as you may offend, upset, damage reputations and I feel IMHO is upsets the equilibrium on the planet.

I find this more when people are angry and vent and rant at people, whilst it is normal and human to be frustrated, it does send out negative vibrations to all when its in a text/email/voicemail etc so yes the edit button is useful here but also what harm does it do to others.
Nasty emails and voicemails the equivalent to poison pen letters create a whole layers of negativity now in the realm.

So as the saying goes, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything; but work it out in a journal or word it so that you are turning a negative into a positive ( or try to)

Froe

froebellian - I'm very careful with my choice of words mostly because in the past my words have been warped by others into something unrecognizable. Other times I'm just plain misunderstood, which is easy to do with text only kinds of communication. I once was asked by a department head to give her back in email a review of my current boss. Basically he was never in the building wasn't available to anyone including me for important issues. So I proceed to put together my real honest thoughts on this person, perhaps not being too kind as I should have been. Only problem was when I went to send it back to the department head, I sent it by mistake directly to the man I was discussing. Needless to say I was mortified when he forwarded it back to me and asked if it was intended for someone else. :icon_eek:

I have a sister that suffers from a severe mental illness and she gets in arguments with me and says I've said things to her that I would never say. It's somewhat funny to observe her making up stuff, but I am who I am and I have to defend myself and tell her for one, I don't talk like that and two, I would have never said such a thing. She still to this day insists that this imaginary conversation took place between us.

So very many complications with communication. I too am somewhat a recluse by choice. I do a lot of communication using email. In fact, it's interesting that I talked to a parent on the phone the other day and neither one of us could think of a thing to say and yet we email each other at great length several times a week, writing little mini books.

Once had a boss that use to call me a "rat fink" and it hurt my feelings so bad I avoided him as much as possible and stayed angry with him. One day he asked me why I wasn't my usual jovial self with him and I told him. He said "rat fink" wasn't used in any negative way by him, it's just his way of communicating and was somewhat of a pet name for me. Go figure.:confused:

So I'm cautious and careful with the words I choose. I'd like to be more free-flowing with my thoughts on SF, but old habits die hard and so I'm careful here too, often holding back what's really on my mind. Oh well, thanks for letting me rant about.

Blackraven

silent whisper
22-06-2014, 11:57 PM
I came across an interesting FB posting
' If you choose to have a closed mind, please choose to have a closed mouth as well.'
Recently I switched off my mobile phone because of the distractions, part of the Hermit thing. I can get over people trying to contact me because I don't need to contact them and I check my email when I want to and answer when I am ready.

I have found people are too eager to press the send button on a text or on an email or even a forum and people have lost their jobs sending emails or texts to the wrong people. Society is too eager and don't realize the consequences of their actions. So think before you open your mouth or hit send as you may offend, upset, damage reputations and I feel IMHO is upsets the equilibrium on the planet.

I find this more when people are angry and vent and rant at people, whilst it is normal and human to be frustrated, it does send out negative vibrations to all when its in a text/email/voicemail etc so yes the edit button is useful here but also what harm does it do to others.
Nasty emails and voicemails the equivalent to poison pen letters create a whole layers of negativity now in the realm.

So as the saying goes, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything; but work it out in a journal or word it so that you are turning a negative into a positive ( or try to)

Froe

In the face of it all I hold myself in love..the world is what it is..we are responsible for our own role in it ...

I prefer to model responsibility rather than tell others what to do.