First post ever. Tarot Reading on a confusing situation

[megancaseys]

Hello,
I am brand new to this forum but I have been reading tarot cards for some time now. I could use some insight on my reading on a particular situation.

I recently met a man who is quite a bit older than me and it was a situation where sparks flew immediately. He initially told me I was far too young for him due to a lot of circumstances in his life (he's 33 with a child and I'm a 22 year old senior in college), but we ended up connecting very strongly. It felt like love at first sight. I ended up staying up with him until 5AM before we went our separate ways (no sex happened or anything like that). Anyway, we talked about seeing each other again and it's been a few days and he's been on my mind constantly. I did a celtic cross reading about the relationship with him. I know it's very early to do something like that but the connection was undeniable and I've been feeling all types of things since that are rough and confusing:

present position card: 10 of swords. Although I haven't been crushed or hurt very bad I can say I have given up on forming any type of connection with another person. I have felt like all it does is lead to pain.

influence on the present: six of wands. This is likely due to how amazing I felt after meeting him.

past: the empress. I guess this could be because I have babysat men in the past or so i've felt like.

recent past: king of swords. This makes perfect sense to me. He's older than me and a wonderful communicator.

crowning thoughts: wheel of fortune. I have never felt such a small amount of control over my feelings until this very moment.

near future: ten of pentacles. This could either mean two things: 1. he won't leave his comfort zone. or 2. he's someone I will be able to be very comfortable around which is also a large possibility. I felt like i could talk to him about anything after meeting him for a brief period.

environment: the moon. We are both in very chaotic stages of life right now.

hopes: three of pentacles. I would like to at least develop something with him. I don't really care if it's a friendship or a relationship (although I want it to be more). I just want some form of connection because I think he is amazing.

fears: the tower. I have a pretty solid foundation i've built for myself where I keep pretty guarded. I don't want that to demolish over one person.

outcome: the hierophant. I am baffled by this. I always felt like the hierophant meant tradition so maybe things will go in a very traditional manner. It could also mean he might not want to push the envelope and try for anything with me.

[Lorelyen]

What would your intuition suggest you do if you'd had no contact with the tarot/reading?

[kimtsan]

I'll just note down some things that I noticed within this spread--they are my interpretations based on the cards drawn so may not be necessarily true to you intuitively.

Seeing the Tower and Hierophant together: maybe you also have concerns about starting a non-traditional relationship since the age gap between the two of you will definitely be a noticeable "feature", if you know what I mean--although 10 years isn't that shocking a gap nowadays. The Hierophant could have connotations of marriage and this might be a possibility that you are considering.

Other than that, I've noticed that there's a pervading sense of structure present in the spread. The Ten of Pentacles (associations with heritage, family structures), Three of Pentacles (creating a visible structure/partnership), The Tower, and the Hierophant.

Lastly, it's interesting how the suit of Cups is completely absent in this spread--considering your question has a strong emotional nature. Sometimes looking at the cards or elements absent can be just as revealing.

Maybe you can try drawing a few Advice Cards, with this question in mind: "Please help me obtain more clarity" or "How can I move forward?" or "What can I know to be true?" OR, just straight-out ask for advice. "ADVICE, PLEASE." XD

Oh and one last thing: Personally I've never liked the Celtic Cross Spread much because any spread that bears the shape of a cross just doesn't click with me for some reason. That's just me, though, and I've never felt quite connected to it. I recommend Journey Spread or Through the Shadows Spread--they're good spreads for self-reflection and can both be found in Barbara Moore's book, "Tarot Spreads: Layouts & Techniques to Empower Your Readings".

[megancaseys]

What would your intuition suggest you do if you'd had no contact with the tarot/reading?

My gut tells me to not give up on it. My head tells me I'll never see him again. But man, my gut is really telling me the opposite.

[Lorelyen]

My gut tells me to not give up on it. My head tells me I'll never see him again. But man, my gut is really telling me the opposite.

Do you mind me asking how long you have been involved with the tarot? I ask because I recently new to reading and am very uneasy about doing a spread for myself.

[megancaseys]

Do you mind me asking how long you have been involved with the tarot? I ask because I recently new to reading and am very uneasy about doing a spread for myself.

2 and half years now.

[Awakened Queen]

I see the Hierophant as a teacher. I think whatever happens, there's a lesson involved.

[Puggy]

I see this as a wake up call. I understand how emotions control your head and how exciting new relationships can be. Wish you well.