Help, advice please!

[turtlelover111]

I am stuck in a situation right now. I have moved along on my spiritual journey very rapidly in the past year, specifically few months. I am in grade 12 and have 4 more months of school left, but I realized awhile ago that going to public school has not been in my best interest for awhile. A) I do NOT plan on going to college or university right away. It may be something I pursue later in life, but I definitely need to do some traveling and soul searching first. B) I feel so low; going to school, studying, doing homework, all of these things lower my vibration. I do not like them and cannot shake that. I used to love school (when I was little) but the ship has sailed long ago. I'm close to graduating, so I know it doesn't make much sense to just quit school now, but when something lowers my vibration this much, what am I supposed to do?? I made the connection of feeling the same way I did before I dumped my ex awhile ago..it was a much needed breakup and I feel the same about school, but I'm stuck in a society and family who does NOT understand that reasoning. I've tried to explain to teachers, councilors, and my parents, but they are so spiritually closed off it's not much use. I have thankfully a spiritual guide who has helped me to see all of this, but she is my old dance teacher and can't do anything about school ): any suggestions? I feel like I'm watching myself go insane.

[Shincarra]

4 months is a short peroid of time and you know this,but I also know it does not feel that way. You are not as weak as you are sounding, you are very strong. When though negative come your stand stong and command them to leave you. When negative things come to mind re-place them with things that make you happy. Feed what is good in your life and starve the negitive things. Life and Love is created, so start creating your life and develop the love that you are inside.

[turtlelover111]

I feel like there is no where to go until I finish school. I can't enjoy the things I used to because school takes all of my motivation away. I feel like i'm stuck in some rut, and I know where I want to go, or at least that I want to go lots of new places, but I can't do any of that until I'm done school. ): It's so frustrating knowing why I'm upset and not being able to change it...or at least, knowing that I CAN change it but would be shunned by most of the people around me for doing it, including my parents. They say they love me unconditionally but I learned a long time ago that they don't know what that really means and I have only been able to share that feeling with certain people who come and go from my life. I'm starving of it and need to find a 'new family' for myself, people I can connect with because I'm very alone right now. Not to mention the lack of physical affection, something I know I need more than some people. The crying, lack of motivation, and negative emotions are all making it clear to me how much this school stuff is affecting me...I guess i'm just lost because I can't find something bigger and positive to counteract that. I appreciate your advice Shincarra! It helps to just be able to vent on here too.

[Sojourner2013]

I say: Accept the inevitable regret that others will project upon you for quitting school and to soothe their disappointment--take your GED without fail ASAP. That way, you have not completely lost your high school purpose--to obtain a piece of paper that says you completed a HS education and take off into the wild blue yonder. I have several degrees and if there is anything that I have learned from all that education, it's this: formal education will get you a job, but life education will get you a vision. PS: the smartest man I ever met (Mr. Graham Webb-Out of the Bottle author), was a multi-millionaire and a third-grade dropout. Best wishes!!

[Shincarra]

Turtlelover111
Almost 50 years ago, I was standing in your shoes. All my school years were bad. I think now I had a learning disability. I had to read everything three and four times just to get what it was saying. I was held back in first and third grade, and I was always in though special classes for slow learners. What a joy that was. Then I became of the age of 16, witch is the age that I could quit school, but I was only in the ninth grade, and had four years to complete high school. So I quit school. So you might say why are you preaching to me about not quitting school. Because I have been right where you are, but I also have lived in this world without a high school diploma. A G.E.d. is not the same as a high school diploma. You might want to check out the differences. Even Sojourner who tells you to quit, has several degrees. So in truth is tell you to go down a road Sojourner2013 has not had to travel. I have wanted better jobs , but because I had no H.S.diploma I was told I could not have the position I was seeking, even though the interviewer knew I could do the job, because I am not Stupid, because I have held jobs that were passed the high school ed. You are only 4 months away from getting away from that neg place, and you will be free. I have travel the world and there are many great places to be, and see. I am just an old man, and you are young, and want to live life now. will 4 months really make that much of a different. I KNOW how you feel, because I have felt it to. I wish you the best no matter what you decide, and I wlll pray for you. Amen.

[Mr Interesting]

Within most things in life that we find ourselves doing there is the possibility of finding joy.

Oops. that doesn't quite work... okay, we are in a place and we don't like. Over time I've found the answer isn't leaving because you'll just end up in a similar environment and get in the same fix. The answer is within what you're doing or should I say the way through is within you. It's just, which is easy to write and somewhat harder to do, just about changing the perspective of what you're doing... not changing the doing.

I found years ago that I no longer enjoyed the work I did even while many around me enjoyed what I did and I was well paid... the outer influence kept me doing it while the inner realised if I kept doing it something had to change. What changed was becoming less reliant on the beginning, the planning. ideas and collecting materials which has always been the most fun and the finishing where what I'd done goes out into the world and finds praise. The bit in the middle, the now, was work because I was thinking too much of the past and the future... so I got into the work.

Being able to drop pasts and futures and just be where you are and doing what you're doing well, with all your focus, opens up a whole new realm of enjoyment.... when you are able to do this the past falls away and the future doesn't matter. Where ever you are is good!

And funnily enough... this is the entrance way to our hearts desire.

[Scott L]

Dear Turtlelover111,

Get your High School Diploma!

Create an alternate reality to live in while you are enduring the next four months of school.

Go on an inner journey for now to replace your longing for travel.

1. The nature of this alternate reality is one in which you regularly count your blessings (I cried because I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet).

2. Choose to be a servant of God. Imagine what God wants you to do and choose to do it. Be an agent for God in your school. Befriend the friendless awkward kid, go out of your way to be kind and do random acts of kindness, help someone with their studies, start a group of kids to shun and ostracize the bullies.

3. Use this next four months to explore and find out how much good you can do.

Living in this alternate reality will make your time at school much more tolerable, and the adventure will be very rewarding.

Happy Graduation.

[Belle]

Indeed, stay where you are. The Schooling isn't lowering your vibrations, it's a strange period for many of us who are feeling trapped and static - but the reality is, there is the swan taking place - a lot of activity going on underwater which can't be seen whilst the tedium and the mundane continue.

I'm really tempted to walk out of a stupid job but I know that would be sooooo wrong. I have to play a long game.

[amy green]

turtlelover111 - since you say that you may pursue college or university later, then you surely acknowledge that it makes sense to complete the 4 months. Why not give it your best shot and let your certificate be a true measure of your ability rather than not really applying yourself?

I realise that school must constitute a large part of your current reality but, the whole of it? School cannot lower your vibration - I guess you realise that it is your attitude to it that does this. What about the rest of the time? Isn't there scope here to offset your resignation and fill it with feel-good factors (to offset the on going negativity), i.e. what inspires you...music? Walks in nature? Exploring this side may help make finishing your course bearable. Why undo what you have achieved up until this point - 4 months will soon pass if you fill your freetime enjoyably.

[Seawolf]

Spirituality should cause us to enjoy learning and to become healthier emotionally, physically, and mentally.. If it causes you not get a high school diploma, I would say there's something wrong.

[turtlelover111]

Wow thank you for all of your replies!! You guys are all very wise; it is incredibly helpful to see my situation from different perspectives. I am sorry that I cannot reply individually to each of you, but Belle, your comment seems to make sense to me. I have felt such a long period of being in that rut, but I think that feeling has passed and there's been a transition into feeling like there's a ball rolling now. Of course I am pretty unsure of my future, even this summer, but I have a good idea of my goals/needs until I am finished high school. The speed of everything is insane to me now; a week goes by in what feels like a day. To think of that makes me happy, school will be over very soon. I am finding the part of creating an alternate reality the most challenging because I am still living at home, with my family. The exposure to negativity is scary sometimes, and I have a hard time being able to "seperate" myself from it because everyone is offended when I politely choose to leave their company if they are upset at everything, but being around the negative discussions makes me irritable and just as negative so it's also hard to switch the moods around. They are at a very, very different spot than me spiritually and although I try to educate and share with them when I can, I think I need to be able to create a new, fresh lifestyle for myself. I feel like once I can start a lifestyle from scratch, I can improve all aspects of my life and make sure to be conscious of all areas affecting each other. I also believe there is some anxiety in me to get to start this new life, so that makes sticking through this part difficult. I suppose I can treat this as the learning period in my life, trying to learn as much as I can before I am living on my own. It is strange to sit here and understand so much about my parents and why they are the way they are but I feel like all of what I learn that way will help me to create a good life for myself/a family some day.

[Shincarra]

Turtlelover111 I am happy you can see away to completing H.S..
I Thank Belle for the words that helped you.
:) :) :) :) :) :) Ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

[Thunder Bow]

Don't worry about what others may think of you. One can come up with 100s of reasons why they feel others will reject oneself.

Seek counseling through your school counseler. He/she can reffer you to a therapist to help you through these feelings. Sometimes one needs guidence.