Telling Funny Stories about Other People

[Joseph123]

My brother recently got a job - his first job, despite what he indicates on his internship resumes - that consists solely of him shoveling horse manure. He returned home after his first day, covered in the material. It was staining his clothes, including the socks and boots that I let him borrow. I was sitting at the kitchen table, eating dinner, when he entered. He removed all of manure-laden clothing right in front of me, throwing it upon the ground by my feet. He then removed his (my) socks - also stained in manure - and swung them around in front of my face.

When I went to take a shower later, I discovered that he had soaked the manure-laden clothing in our bathtub. The clothes are still hanging up all over our home, drying.


***


I was working on a school project with a girl whom I know quite well and some other people. We were sitting around a table, I directly across from the girl in question. I have very long legs, which were extended all of the way over to her. My feet were cemented to the floor, having never once moved. She bumped her feet into mine several times, before demanding that I stop playing "footsie" with her, saying that it was creepy.


***


I find both of those things to be quite funny and I have had the motivation to recount them to my friends. However, I recall the platitudes about not talking about another person behind his or her back. I do not say anything negative about another person behind his or her back.

My question is whether or not you think that it is permissible to recount stories like that - in which I am discussing another person - but that do not seem to paint the person in a negative light. For that matter, if a friend or relative asks a mother how her child is doing, is it permissible to say, "Timmy is doing x, y, and z?" How far should one take the notion of not speaking about others behind his or her back? Must it be considered on a case-by-case basis? Is the policy that I have in place now (anything that is not negative) a good one?


Thanks

[Belle]

People talk about each other all the time.

People get hurt about what is said.

However, if your intent is pure, and if you are sensitive to how the other might feel about having their situations disclosed, then I see no harm.

I've had my fingers burnt about telling stories about others, and also been burned. I would probably suggest it is part of life, but one has to be open to the fact that there may be some character building and relationship development issues along the way.

Discernment is very very necessary.

[Riboflavin]

I agree with belle.

The other day I was telling a friend (a female) about a dream I had about a relationship with a different woman. She misunderstood me and thought I was dreaming about her and told her BF who got mad at me lol...

[Mr Interesting]

I suppose it's just about being aware of what you're actually trying to say. If it's in appropriate you usually get a little nudge from spirit within the telling and this helps to clarify whether you're telling to put yourself above someone or guide you towards something within your own story you should be aware of.

I think also that you've got to allow that others will do the same with you and if you can laugh at yourself as if it's others putting you down then it seems you can do the same with others and that ability to see yourself as the butt of others jokes will somewhat colour the story to be not just a putdown but store within it a message for a bigger audience.

It's not really about a dividing line between ourselves and others but how much we own those standpoints from which we declare what we are and how we charge or discharge emotional attachment.

[Joseph123]

Thank you very much for the replies.

I have considered the matter thoroughly. Would I have told either story had the person that the story involved been present? I cannot say so.

I think that the doctrine that I am going to apply to my life is as follows: I will only make reference to another person if what I have to say with regard to them is notably positive.

It is really very difficult to catch oneself at first. I was telling my brother about how one member of our school project group was unwilling to meet until very late at night on Monday because of a commitment that she had. We both laughed and sort of mocked the fact that she was in a sorority and therefore consequent obligations. In hindsight, and it is now obvious, we were mocking another person.

I am generally about 10% as funny and probably fun to be around as I was before my awakening, but I suppose that that is a small price to pay. One thing that is working wonders for me is the very cliche, "What would Jesus do?" Could I imagine Jesus doing any of the things that I have described in this thread? No.