Why does it seem like I can't heal ME?

[TheressaWilliams]

I've assisted a handful of friends with minor healing and bits of assistive emotional healing for several people. They seem to walk off, feeling much better, which is WONDERFUL! But it seems to me like my "way" of healing is to take what's wrong with them, and take it into myself to cleanse it later. So they feel better.

Only BIG issue is, this feels involuntary. And when I go to meditate to try and cleanse my own energy, I get this overwhelming feeling that I'm attacking myself. Also, I've had a friend who is very good at healing, attempt to help me. Anytime he tried to address the negative energy and cleanse it, he says it feels like there's something else within me, attacking him and keeping him from helping.

Also. Even the mentioning of anybody trying to "Help Me" and My defenses go up. It's almost as if this "Entity" Is attached to my defense/ Fight or flight reflexes. And make me feel like I'm being attacked. This too is involuntary.

I realize that I'm being helped, I'm grateful for the help. But it's as if I'm not receptive to healing. I'm getting to the point where it's affecting me physically now, and I'm really getting worried. I've unfortunately had to tell a very close friend of mine, I could no longer go through with anymore emotional healing sessions for fear that whatever is affecting might affect her...

[Mayflow]

Maybe everything is ok as it is and really doesn't need any healing? Left to your own devices, it is arguable that you will heal from within. It seems better that way than having someone else do it for you (or attempt to) - I think there is a natural self protective device that rebels when others try to do that for you. You, I think know best how to heal whatever it is that you think needs to be healed within you, although I'm not sure that you need any healing. What do you think we need to be healed from?

[TheressaWilliams]

I'd agree, except it seems like I only get worse. I've tried to heal myself a few times. Maybe I haven't found the right technique for me? I know there's plenty of different techniques I've not been made aware of yet. Is there anything you'd suggest?

[Mayflow]

I'd agree, except it seems like I only get worse. I've tried to heal myself a few times. Maybe I haven't found the right technique for me? I know there's plenty of different techniques I've not been made aware of yet. Is there anything you'd suggest?

I still have no clues as what it is you think you need to be healed from.

[Quagmire]

Have you tried simply to let the energy be part of you and naturally direct it out of you, instead of trying to control the flow of energy.

[7luminaries]

I would just suggest your friend send you love and general healing energy rather than trying to cleanse or fix anything, if he's not clear how to sort it.

Love & light is always a good thing and you can't go wrong there.

Then ask your guides to help out in the cleansing. Watch them. They will show you.

Then afterwards, discuss with them that you are being drained in your healing efforts, and ask them to give you healing and to guide you in the ways of healing that will NOT drain you.

Once you understand this, then healing becomes very different. It still requires energy and focus, but the great bulk of it is divine energy, or love, that you channel and shape and direct.
That is the ocean and you are in it, so there should be no negative effects as a rule other than temporary fatigue...

That's why I try to do my healing work before BEDTIME ;)

Peace & blessings,
7L

[TheressaWilliams]

7Luminaries: Thank you so much for your advice
I think what my problem might be that I'm trying to take on all of the healing by myself, when instead I should be asking for help and guidance from my guardians, like you mentioned.
I find myself having to re-evaluate my entire process for healing, and it feels wonderful to know that I may be able to help myself now, as well as others!

[Sapphirez]

good luck Theresa hope all's agreeable soon! cool advice 7luminaries! ♥

[Sarian]

Well, I think I can relate to that feeling. I just spent one and a half hours tonight crying, becoming anxiety ridden, full of distrust and fear, so much so I started throwing up and having heaves...all because distrust and disbelief kicked in and I have been working hard on some emotional issues...when I knew I was losing control and spiraling, i got more upset that I wasn't controlling it. I have at times wondered if there was some entity attached to me...or was I losing my mind. In the past people have prayed over me thinking something demonic was involved, others suggested I'm damaged due to things that have happened in my life, childhood and married life, unfaithful, abusive spouse. But one thing I'm always told is how strong I am. I suppose I am, so why do I fall apart as I do and become so weak and pathetic?

I think for me, as much as I would love for someone to take a magic wand and whoosh it over me or knock me out with it when I'm a mess, it's up to me to fix me or at least stop being so hard on myself. Maybe not resist it so much but understand it, have compassion for it, love it and accept it even, so it can heal on its own. I can heal.

[Xan]

Only BIG issue is, this feels involuntary. And when I go to meditate to try and cleanse my own energy, I get this overwhelming feeling that I'm attacking myself. Also, I've had a friend who is very good at healing, attempt to help me. Anytime he tried to address the negative energy and cleanse it, he says it feels like there's something else within me, attacking him and keeping him from helping.

Theressa... It seems obvious to me that this is the very thing that needs clearing before you can go ahead.

Whether it's a separate entity or part of your own mind it can be faced directly, communicated with openly, and released.


Xan

[Xan]

It's up to me to...
stop being so hard on myself.

Maybe not resist it so much
but understand it,
have compassion for it,
love it
and accept it even,
so it can heal on its own.

I can heal.


I love this true poem you wrote, Sarian. :wink:


Xan

[Sapphirez]

I guess that's one of the things that is so great about EFT, it teaches you to tell yourself you Accept and love yourself No Matter What!! Because it's a lot more important than we think.

[7luminaries]

7Luminaries: Thank you so much for your advice
I think what my problem might be that I'm trying to take on all of the healing by myself, when instead I should be asking for help and guidance from my guardians, like you mentioned.
I find myself having to re-evaluate my entire process for healing, and it feels wonderful to know that I may be able to help myself now, as well as others!

Yes I think I've learned that is the key...when you are becoming very drained either emotionally or even just directly on a physical level, that is the time to reach out to your guides and allow them to show you and even take over some of it for you.

I had a massive integration effort, a final phase of healing over many months for someone else. We are still in the final phases whilst his system amps up his detox processing. Meantime my energy and especially the guides are helping him. It was too much at first for either of us to take on his system detox need whilst he was still learning how to adapt to the healing process that he in effect will take on and maintain on his own.

The guides have been key. They have taken over that aspect of the healing process & allowed everything to go forward whilst keeping us both healthy.

:hug3: wishing you all the best in your healing work,
7L

[Sangress]

Ok, this is going to be long, but I can’t seem to find a way to make this simple.

I’ve encountered other people with your kind of issue before and there are different reasons for such a thing. From the little I have read about your situation, three distinct possibilities come to mind. Each possibility results in the more or less the same affects. I’ll number them from the most possible to the least possible (in my opinion.)

(Also, I am a very blunt and direct kind of person, so some of this may seem harsh, but it is just what I’ve seen and learned from my own experience. I don’t usually care to stylize words so as to spare a persons feelings.)

1. You are empathic and your method of healing centers on that empathic sensitivity. You make a deep connection to others and experience their pain as your own whilst healing them. Your energy mirrors theirs by instinct in order for you to understand what ails them, its an indirect way of “becoming” the other person so that your body can heal them…but you are left with the mirror image of their pain imprinted on your energetic body which first affects your mind (emotions and perspective…etc) and if left for long enough it bleeds over and affects your physical body.

If this is the case, the easiest way to prevent this pain from occurring is to learn how to completely sever your connection to them and then ground and clear out your energy so that it renews to its original state.

2. Your energetically transfer their awareness of their own pain into you, which causes you to litterally take responsibility for and experience their own damage. This is not healing, its simply removing a problem to be dealt with at a later time. A bit like procrastination. You cannot heal anothers pain for them in that way. The trick to healing is to allow them to heal themselves with your guidance, aiding a natural process.

In order to avoid this happening a new method would need to be sought because once you are unable to handle their pain, it would either slowly return to them through the bond you formed with them or all the present pain these people encounter will go directly to you and be amplified over time. In essence they would be attacking or harming you without realizing.

3. A spirit could be attached to your metaphysical body or awareness via energetic cords or hosting within you whilst bound to a part of your energetic body/system. These two situations are not possession as you are aware of yourself during these healing sessions (possessed people tend to black out when the entity/spirit is in control) so it would be a side-affect of such a close bond with that spirit. If the spirit does not fare well with the particular type of energy you use to heal, then instinctually it would probably react negatively and cause adverse reactions within you.

With a situation like that someone would need to verify the separated consciousness of that spirit, acknowledge that spirits presence and converse with the spirit to find out why they are there, what has been happening and so on and so forth, then come to some form of arrangement to ease both of your conflict and/or suffering.

There is another possibility, but it is not directly related to the way you heal others. You may have had some trauma or hurt in your past and your body and mind could be alerting you to the problem when you heal others because you yourself need healing first and foremost. But, that is speculation on my part because I don’t know you or your history…so you can make sense of that however you like.

I’d be glad to take a look at you myself and cancel out the third possible scenario (the spirit that may be interfering with your healing methods.) I think that perhaps you will have a good idea of which of the first two possibilities feels familiar to you, I’d suggest following your intuition with that.

Lastly, due to the lack of detailed information regarding healing methods, specific outcomes of healing session and personal history…I could be overlooking a number of other possibilities here, so take it with a grain of salt.

Hope that helps.

[TinTin]

Dear TheressaWilliams,
As you know when you help other people, if your energy system and protection is not strong, those people's energies become your energy and will make you sick. I really don't think you should be doing healing for anyone right now until you are able to protect yourself.

It sounds like an entity is attached to you. I used to have many dark entities attached to me. A healer helps me to remove all of them. It was an extensive cleansing.
I think you should pray day and night to your guides and angels to remove all those in your energy field that are not for your highest good.
Hmm...I am thinking about the silver violet flame. maybe it might be able to help you. google it.

[TheressaWilliams]

Yeah, I stopped a few months ago. Right now I am committing time to make sure that I am healthy and in control of my energy. Until I feel I am comfortable working, and healing myself, I will not be having the sessions I used to have with my close friends.
I would never want to risk the safety of others because of stubborn pride :) I know this needs to be fixed, and that I need to re-assess my healing methods :)

[happydays]

My wife and I have been doing the MIR method - mentioned in this Forum under Healing section - also on youtube.

I believe that on the founder's website someone wrote in to say that s/he got over ME thanks to the MIR method.

Look into it!

Happydays

[Seawolf]

It's up to me to...
stop being so hard on myself.

Maybe not resist it so much
but understand it,
have compassion for it,
love it
and accept it even,
so it can heal on its own.

I can heal.


I love this true poem you wrote, Sarian. :wink:

Xan

This poem is so true for me in my life right now, I feel like crying when reading it. Wonderful words Sarian! :smile:

[Seawolf]

I've heard that healing others spiritually is actually supposed to be about healing yourself. If you try to heal others without realizing it's you that's needing the healing, you can get into a lot of trouble.