The inner critic

[silent whisper]

My thoughts today led me to the inner critic. How this inner critic plays out in our lives. Sometimes it so subtle it often comes through to reveal itself in ways that it will attach itself to an attracting energy. I often wonder where our inner critic transpired from. Most times I imagine it comes from one or both of our parents. Perfectionism comes to mind. The inner critic serves itself and plays out and becomes critical of others. Often times their is constructive criticisim, that supports another to grow. But the sabotauging inner critic that needs to harm others, will do at all costs to keep it alive. It will often sabotauge the one who is self critical in ways that will be direct or indirect. Most often times the subtle side of it is used when the harm cannot be inflicted directly. Their is some degree of cunningness in the inner critic in that arrangement. It still gets to serve its need. Yet it can be so subtle many would miss themselves in that expression it takes on. Sometimes we can be very aware of or inner critic at play. Sometimes we can be aware of it but still direct it at a source because it is so ingrained in us. Its who we feel we have to be. To let go of the inner critic, it would mean a whole new approach to how we interact with others. Dropping the critical space at others, would mean we would have to accept them fully and ourselves. That can be daunting to transform oneself to that degree of change. But anything is possible if we are not afraid to drop the mask.

[deepsea]

Interesting topic.

Inside critic.

How often have we critised ourselves?
How often have we critised others?
How often have others critised us?

To what benefit?
Deepsea

[rsingh]

Roots of inner critic is in our ego. Ego likes to compare itself with others and want to be better than all other egos. It criticises others to prove itself to be better than others. It criticises itself to be achieve a desired self which it is never going to reach.

[seeker2011]

Roots of inner critic is in our ego. Ego likes to compare itself with others and want to be better than all other egos. It criticises others to prove itself to be better than others. It criticises itself to be achieve a desired self which it is never going to reach.


You got that right,
What I dont seem to be able to figure out is why.
Why would an integral part of our consciousness want to fight against our conscious intentions?
What most replies to this amount to is the fight for survival and/or life of the ego as a seperate part. Seperate from it's origin, US, and therefore summarily self evident.
The reasons for the struggles on the physical plane are elusive at best, and these days, extremely troublesome.

[Mountain-Goat]

"If you want to follow me to freedom, be prepared to swim upstream, against the river of conditioning.
Be prepared to grapple continuously with the fierce flow of negative mental currents. In time our strokes will become effortless and our sense of purpose irresistible." - Buddha

"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." - Carl Rogers

"Mindfulness refers to keeping one's consciousness alive to the present reality. It is the miracle by which we master and restore ourselves." - Thich Nhat Hanh

"Our soul work...is to repair ourselves, to heal into wholeness. It is, simply put, to identify and remove whatever gets in the way of being truly who we are. It is the task of uncovering our authentic self from the encrustations that overlay it, concealing it from us." - M.J. Abadie

"You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside." - Wayne Dyer

"Enlightenment is not about imagining figures of light but of making the darkness conscious." " - Carl Jung

"We human beings have many prevailing perceptions we share as a culture. These perceptions are the prevalent beliefs our society accepts as true, generally without question.
Many of these shared perceptions form the basis of our human awareness. If we do not make the effort to question whether or not a perception is actually true,
it will automatically become part of our belief system and, consequently our experience, whether they are true or not." - Victoria Loveland-Coen

The more self aware one becomes, the more one uncovers the things of self that are hidden from one's consciousness, the things inside the subconscious.
The things one is unconscious of, asleep to, not aware of.

The critic is self holding onto self condemning thoughts\beliefs that were created by self as one was growing up.
Thoughts and beliefs that the adult self now recognises as self condemning.
They were unintelligently created during youth, but now more intelligent, one can remove them and replace them with loving accepting thoughts.

I don't see it as there being a Critic inside self, but simply one was not aware self has created and held onto these condemning thoughts\beliefs.
Becoming self aware gives the person the ability to change that which is no longer beneficial.

The self created them, the self can uncreate them.
Change involves open and honest observation, thus acknowledgement of these thoughts\beliefs,
also acknowledgement that self created them thus also one has the ability to change them.

The same power that was mistakenly used to create cendemning thoughts\beliefs is the same power to change them.

Is this not the process of growth. To go from one state to another. To accept and own full responsibility of past, preset and future inner structures that control one's life.

[grim789]

The inner critic is a good and bad thing i think why? I feel that on one side it is good, example; When we get that feeling that something just is not right its almost like intuition i guess but it does seem to be similar in the same effect. I can definatly find more bad than good with it though. As it does block for expansion of ones self, judging others, self esteem etc. The ego is a hard thing to live with sometimes but then again sometimes i feel it protects us from the harshness of the world. I mean there is a lot of people who are not peaceful loving people, and just seem to want to make everyones life terrible or to hurt others emotinally. Just some thoughts i dont have much experiene on studying the ego (Self Critic). Good topic though thanks for posting up.

Peace,
Grim

[Neville]

There is a way to circumvent the inner critic... When the inner critic tells you that you are useless and an idiot. accept it.

Honestly.. acknowledge that sometimes you are an idiot and sometimes you are ineffective.. In doing so you very quickly come to realise how perfectly imperfect you are and hence how in aligned with all that is, you are. Perfection is an ideal that will ever be unattainable. a castle in the sky.

[Gem]

My thoughts today led me to the inner critic. How this inner critic plays out in our lives. Sometimes it so subtle it often comes through to reveal itself in ways that it will attach itself to an attracting energy. I often wonder where our inner critic transpired from. Most times I imagine it comes from one or both of our parents. Perfectionism comes to mind. The inner critic serves itself and plays out and becomes critical of others. Often times their is constructive criticisim, that supports another to grow. But the sabotauging inner critic that needs to harm others, will do at all costs to keep it alive. It will often sabotauge the one who is self critical in ways that will be direct or indirect. Most often times the subtle side of it is used when the harm cannot be inflicted directly. Their is some degree of cunningness in the inner critic in that arrangement. It still gets to serve its need. Yet it can be so subtle many would miss themselves in that expression it takes on. Sometimes we can be very aware of or inner critic at play. Sometimes we can be aware of it but still direct it at a source because it is so ingrained in us. Its who we feel we have to be. To let go of the inner critic, it would mean a whole new approach to how we interact with others. Dropping the critical space at others, would mean we would have to accept them fully and ourselves. That can be daunting to transform oneself to that degree of change. But anything is possible if we are not afraid to drop the mask.

Nicely said.

I keep blurbing Nicholas Hartmans poem Two Faces, because the poet understands something most people do not, humans need two faces.

People have written entire volumes on identity, and word dropping 'ego' indicates no more giving a capital letter to love or truth does.

How can any one person be other than the product of their past? What possible perspective can anyone have besides their collective memory? How can a person who once was deeply wounded not have a visible scar? How can the aged have no wrinkles? Why is destiny etched into the palm of our hands?

The loving face presented here at SF has eyes that see the ugly face, a mind that seeks ugly faces, and behind the desire to fix the disfigurement, the wrinkle... is a distinction, a comparison, where I can be so beautiful as long as I can find the deformed.

[Humm]

... humans need two faces.
For who? ..

[Neville]

It's for whom.. not For who?...

http://web.ku.edu/~edit/whom.html

[Humm]

It's for whom.. not For who?...
You're British, aren't you? :tongue:

[Neville]

You're British, aren't you? :tongue:

No fooling you Humm:D

[Gem]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26h-H6CFO-A

[silent whisper]

There is a way to circumvent the inner critic... When the inner critic tells you that you are useless and an idiot. accept it.

Honestly.. acknowledge that sometimes you are an idiot and sometimes you are ineffective.. In doing so you very quickly come to realise how perfectly imperfect you are and hence how in aligned with all that is, you are. Perfection is an ideal that will ever be unattainable. a castle in the sky.


yes today I had to open up that deep vulnerable space and look it in the eye. I have looked at it before. Today in recognition of that humanness in what I feel. I felt a shift. not so much in the issue at hand. But in me. Sometimes the critic in me does suggest that feeling some things is not right. So today i gave myself permission to feel it all. Express it all and be ok with it all before me. So for me this is simply about feeling certain feelings and being ok. I suspect that the old patterns of suppressed feelings as wrong, simply needed to give the ok to feel. My inner critic now tells me I am not that which I see. But my feeling space sometimes just needs to be alligned to it all. Feel, let go, reconnect to my centre. For someone who has suppressed to feeling the truth of feelings most of their life. I forget sometimes old ones that closed off that space in me, sneak in and take me by surprise. So in the face of pain, I simply only need honour what I feel now. Not react to the feeling or the face I see.

[silent whisper]

"Our soul work...is to repair ourselves, to heal into wholeness. It is, simply put, to identify and remove whatever gets in the way of being truly who we are. It is the task of uncovering our authentic self from the encrustations that overlay it, concealing it from us." - M.J. Abadie

Yes sometimes collisons come to allow us to see we are more than what we collide with. We only have to repair the damage we receive. And as I do this more often in collisions, I never lose sight of the soul journey and how far I have come.

[silent whisper]

Nicely said.

I keep blurbing Nicholas Hartmans poem Two Faces, because the poet understands something most people do not, humans need two faces.

People have written entire volumes on identity, and word dropping 'ego' indicates no more giving a capital letter to love or truth does.

How can any one person be other than the product of their past? What possible perspective can anyone have besides their collective memory? How can a person who once was deeply wounded not have a visible scar? How can the aged have no wrinkles? Why is destiny etched into the palm of our hands?

The loving face presented here at SF has eyes that see the ugly face, a mind that seeks ugly faces, and behind the desire to fix the disfigurement, the wrinkle... is a distinction, a comparison, where I can be so beautiful as long as I can find the deformed.


The wounds if not harboured in fear, can heal. Are we products of our past? We can carry a wound with us for as long as we want. Sometimes wounds you think have healed, linger to feel not think about. In the remants of the pain, the threads attached only require a face willing to let go. It takes more energy to contain it, than it does to free it.

You are right. We seek out the face of others that we wish to connect ourselves to. Is it always to fix? You see with your eyes. Are your the eyes of each one here to know their desires? Are you their heart and soul? Are you their mind? Or are you you? You see this space. I know this space. yet I only know it now because you have brought it back to me to see. When I read those words. I have no desire to fix anyone. I desire to share me. What is in me to share, to give.If you see more behind that desire. I wonder if you see the face that sees this?

[Gem]

The wounds if not harboured in fear, can heal. Are we products of our past? We can carry a wound with us for as long as we want. Sometimes wounds you think have healed, linger to feel not think about. In the remants of the pain, the threads attached only require a face willing to let go. It takes more energy to contain it, than it does to free it.

People are intricate things, so they come one at a time without generalized preconceptions. Even the golden rule can only be a guideline.

You are right. We seek out the face of others that we wish to connect ourselves to. Is it always to fix? You see with your eyes. Are your the eyes of each one here to know their desires? Are you their heart and soul? Are you their mind? Or are you you? You see this space. I know this space. yet I only know it now because you have brought it back to me to see. When I read those words. I have no desire to fix anyone. I desire to share me. What is in me to share, to give.If you see more behind that desire. I wonder if you see the face that sees this?

I know something of human desire so need not pretend I'm naive about these things. You speak about 'space' a lot, but by being so spacious yourself you crowd others out. I often have three poeple all on my case at once making inane psycological assessments, but I can play the same stupid game and say all you see is a projection of yourself.

[Mountain-Goat]

"Our soul work...is to repair ourselves, to heal into wholeness. It is, simply put, to identify and remove whatever gets in the way of being truly who we are. It is the task of uncovering our authentic self from the encrustations that overlay it, concealing it from us." - M.J. Abadie

Yes sometimes collisons come to allow us to see we are more than what we collide with. We only have to repair the damage we receive. And as I do this more often in collisions, I never lose sight of the soul journey and how far I have come.
It can be said that collisions is when a person wakes up.
If they were already awake, they wouldn't have run into things.
And you see more when you are awake.

"The basic principle of spiritual life is that our problems become the very place to discover wisdom and love." - Jack Kornfield

"Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling, with the mistaken belief that you cannot bear the pain.
But you have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all that you are beyond that pain." - Kahlil Gibran

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem." - Theodore Rubin

[silent whisper]

It can be said that collisions is when a person wakes up.
If they were already awake, they wouldn't have run into things.
And you see more when you are awake.

"The basic principle of spiritual life is that our problems become the very place to discover wisdom and love." - Jack Kornfield

"Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling, with the mistaken belief that you cannot bear the pain.
But you have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all that you are beyond that pain." - Kahlil Gibran

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem." - Theodore Rubin


Is feeling a collision? Or is feeling an honouring of what one feels when the collide their own with anothers? I guess for me the description of collision is not boxed in to just mean running into things.

And I like Kahlils approach too..

[silent whisper]

People are intricate things, so they come one at a time without generalized preconceptions. Even the golden rule can only be a guideline.



I know something of human desire so need not pretend I'm naive about these things. You speak about 'space' a lot, but by being so spacious yourself you crowd others out. I often have three poeple all on my case at once making inane psycological assessments, but I can play the same stupid game and say all you see is a projection of yourself.

Yeah you have a problem when I speak of space..its about the second or third time you have mentioned it..but thats ok I suspect you can create your own interpretation of that space...As you have done. I am glad you understand about projection. It means you can play that game if you chooose then you wont be left out in the cold.....

[Gem]

Yeah you have a problem when I speak of space..its about the second or third time you have mentioned it..but thats ok I suspect you can create your own interpretation of that space...As you have done. I am glad you understand about projection. It means you can play that game if you chooose then you wont be left out in the cold.....

Well it's simple really... you really crowded me out until I just had to ignore you completely, so when you say 'space' alot, I find it pretty amusing, and what you want from me is to learn how to give space. The thing is, that happens by itself and I can't do anything.

[silent whisper]

Well it's simple really... you really crowded me out until I just had to ignore you completely, so when you say 'space' alot, I find it pretty amusing, and what you want from me is to learn how to give space. The thing is, that happens by itself and I can't do anything.


Did I crowd you out? Why didnt you say that. You just ignored me. That wasnt fair. You could have said P** off or something...you know. I am not a bloody mind reader. Dont get so hung up on space..chill out. You told me to stop being so serious....Stop getting so hung up on my words...

[rsingh]

Originally posted by Seeker2011
You got that right,
What I dont seem to be able to figure out is why.
Why would an integral part of our consciousness want to fight against our conscious intentions?
What most replies to this amount to is the fight for survival and/or life of the ego as a seperate part. Seperate from it's origin, US, and therefore summarily self evident.
The reasons for the struggles on the physical plane are elusive at best, and these days, extremely troublesome.

Hi Seeker2011

It is the nature of consciousness. It is playing hide and seek game. Loosing itself in form and then finding itself. If does not loose itself then there is no finding. So no game. So consciousness is just playing a game with itself. There is no loss or gain in this game. It is just a game for the fun of the game.

No body has truly come with an answer of why. But that is what I can make out with my little understanding.