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GoldChord
14-03-2007, 05:16 PM
Hello,

I have never been a lonely person. I have always preferred my own company. Yet, lately as I have been on this spiritual journey, I have become more preoccupied with loneliness. Is lonelinees fear of the Self? The more I seem to peel back the layers of me to access (to paraphrase Oprah) my authentic Self, the more I seem to be concerned with being alone and the fears that it raises. Does anyone have thoughts on loneliness and the fears it manifests?

Take care.

kundalini
15-03-2007, 03:13 AM
Hi GoldChord,

I will not talk about loneliness here. I will say however that it is perfectly normal to experience emotions and thoughts relating to things such as that when you begin to ask questions of your inner self. These feelings and thoughts which always seem to have been there but never noticed are finally arriving within the realms of your self-awareness for you to analyse and take note of.

My only advice about this to you is that try not to focus on the concept of loneliness and the fears it manifests for it will be a seed in your mind that will just grow bigger and bigger until you give the whole thing 'closure'. Instead, focus on unity and the love it manifests.

I hope that helps, K.

dreamer
15-03-2007, 05:51 AM
I look at it this way, we are one which means we are alone essentially....but the nice thing is that until we feel at peace with this we help ourself out by creating the illusion of many...so we won't have to deal with real lonliness until we are ready to do so with total ease and want.

angelicious
15-03-2007, 11:39 AM
Kia ora, hello,

I am never alone. I view everyone else this way too. Hey, that's just me though.

A fantastic book I have (Free To Be Me), and through my own self-development, gave me this understanding of loneliness.....

When feeling lonely we are usually in a space between two needs - the need to be alone, and the need for company. Loneliness is prompting us to clarify what we need (to be alone or have company) and to make a decision.

If you feel you want to be with others, ring somebody up. If you want to be alone, decide what you're going to do to have an enjoyable time on your own. These decisions work well for occasional loneliness.

However, if loneliness plays a big part in your life then it's probably because you don't like the person you're alone with. If this is so, then you need to take the steps to accept, like and love yourself more.

amyangel
15-03-2007, 12:04 PM
Hi, every-ONE :D

Well, for me, I've always considered the words Alone, or Alone-ness as an indication of what we all are really...ALL-ONE or ALL-ONE-NESS...It kind of changes what the experience of aloneness means to me.

Love

AMY :D

amy green
16-03-2007, 02:59 PM
lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

amy green
16-03-2007, 03:12 PM
Like yourself, GoldChord, I rarely feel lonely. Am independent, self-sufficient. From what I understand/experience on loneliness, it feels like being uncared for, unsupported, unloved. I don't think it's "fear of the self". Try just going with the feeling (without analysing it) to see what it's telling you....

Maybe alienation is one stage on from loneliness - I certainly feel this (have spoken about it on my first thread); a byproduct of being too spiritual in a materialistic world. This website is a healing experience for me though! It's wonderful to find so many like-minded souls out there...

cweiters
16-03-2007, 03:12 PM
Hello amy green you just said a mount full, been missing you :hug2:

loneliness = 1

I've been lonely most of my life, now I've found those that are similar yet still no mate for me yet. Many not so good feeling spring from loneliness GoldChord. Example: distrust, paranoia, care taking, people pleasing just to name a few.
If you continue on the path of spiritual enlightenment you will find yourself in good company 24-7.

Love to all
cw

kris
16-03-2007, 10:57 PM
Feeling of loneliness arises from not understanding how we relate to the world and what our role in the world is.

dreamer
16-03-2007, 11:13 PM
Hello amy green you just said a mount full, been missing you :hug2:

loneliness = 1

I've been lonely most of my life, now I've found those that are similar yet still no mate for me yet. Many not so good feeling spring from loneliness GoldChord. Example: distrust, paranoia, care taking, people pleasing just to name a few.
If you continue on the path of spiritual enlightenment you will find yourself in good company 24-7.

Love to all
cw

Aww, cw you are lovely, really lovely - you'll find your mate, just decide what you want, ask and be open to receiving.

amy green
17-03-2007, 03:50 PM
Aww, cw you are lovely, really lovely - you'll find your mate, just decide what you want, ask and be open to receiving.

Better yet, there's nothing like self-fulfillment! Finding happiness through someone else (though heady, exciting, wonderful for a time) is always second-hand. I'm more ambitious than that; to be peaceful/content within yourself is where it's at (spiritually). I understand that, when you're young, (which I'm not) it's harder to overcome social conditioning that views being without a partner as something negative. All in good time....

Thanks cw for your kind comments - always nice to be appreciated.

angelicious
18-03-2007, 01:46 AM
Absolutely Amy,

A fantastic relationship within leads to fantastic relationships without. Living the truth that "I am always in good company" becomes the condition of unconditioning, or reprogramming that has far more positive & true consequences. Changing perspectives (outlook) is all it takes to get your life moving in a glorious direction.

A reprogramming of past (untrue) conditioning is the inner work that can be done in order to have a true sense of Self i.e. if you are still living with the program of..."oh, I'm so lonely, I need someone or something to keep me company," reprogramming this seed condition to "I love my own company, and I like the company of others. I'm fantastic either way."

daisy
18-03-2007, 01:59 AM
imo lonliness isn't about being alone, its about a fear of being with others who do not understand you

GoldChord
19-03-2007, 04:22 PM
Daisy = clever

I think this might be what I'm feeling. I've always been the odd one out - now I'm actually dealing with me, this is one of the major issues that must be released - being different, odd, not accepted and my fear of this perception.

All these responses are so cool and given me much to ponder. You guys rock!

Take care.

daisy
19-03-2007, 06:50 PM
be proud of your uniqueness

FebruaryFlower
22-03-2007, 02:58 PM
When you are alone, that's the time you get to self-reflect the most and get in touch with the higher powers. This is a time that i use to raise my spiritual vibrations and undo/resolve inner conflicts. Don't think of being alone because you really aren't...talk to that invisible friend beside you even if it's out loud. You would be amazed at the wonderful qualities you discover within yourself. Try to rest/recharge within during this time. Lonliness forces use to face ourselves...when we accept aloneness then we passed the hardest part. The best part is yet to come.

flashstorm
23-03-2007, 12:18 AM
I am of the opinion that people who go through loneliness eventually learn to appreciate how precious life and relationships are, but they can find themselves trapped in a mental attitude that reinforces their circumstance and they may find it extremely difficult to connect with other people and find a way out of their loneliness. This situation can occur even when a person has many aquaintances.

I think loneliness is different from a determination to separate yourself from the social obligations of the age of the world you live in, in order to pursue a path of specific spiritual growth.

A person who is lonely finds themself alone in the world without any meaningful emotional connection to others, they are essentially trapped in an emotional abyss and can see no way out of it. For some people this is a karmic issue, where for example they were preoccupied in a previous life with the pursuit of power or wealth without valuing the human relationships they were engaged in. In order to be successful as a human being in social and evolutionary terms as well as basic well being, meaningful relationships are essential, and the lack of those relationships leads to psychological and emotional dysfunction. Fear can be a big part of the equation of loneliness and some people create barriers and shields around themselves to protect themselves, which pushes others away.

Yet the abyss of loneliness can be a place of ultimate spiritual realization if the insight is gained that as spiritual beings we transcend the entire human evolution and outside of space and time we are one with the divine in a love that is omnipresent. It is then the task of the lonely to express that love to others within confines of the incarnation they find themselves in. Loneliness can sometimes be a signal of selfishness and an indication that we need to be more of service to others and give of ourself in ways that might often be uncomfortable or inconvenient. However more often than not loneliness is the silent cry of someone from behind self created barriers of fear that is extremely sensitive and doesn't love themself as they should. For such people the best thing that they can do is find a loving community that accepts them for who they are and allows their social identity to grow, this is by no means easy to find. Some people who have many good relationships, have as their greatest fear the idea of being alone, or growing old and being alone. For such people they are too attached to their social identity and need to develop a greater spiritual identity.

The truth is none of us is ever alone. As human beings, our mental and emotional bodies are so intimately connected that it is only a dysfunction of human behaviour that prevents widespread telepathy and empathy. As spiritual beings we are joined to great spiritual families of angelic and other beings throughout this galaxy and on higher planes that have a vested interest in our continued evolution and enlightenment. As divine beings we are never separate from our connection to Cosmic and divine love. And yes, ultimately we are one with all things. Yet crossing that abyss of loneliness is essentially part of the work some must do in dealing with the darkness within themselves, yet the joy that awaits on the other side is worth the trial and that's the same for any spiritual journey.

kundalini
23-03-2007, 03:28 AM
Hi flashstorm,

That's a brilliant post, full of truth and very well stated!

K.