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View Full Version : THE POWER OF WORDS...MANNERS


Smiler
05-03-2011, 09:13 AM
:hug3:

HUGS TO ALL.. IF WE HAVE HAD THIS THREAD BEFORE " SORRY" ..WE DO HAVE A LOT ON HERE.

THE POWER OF WORDS .. WOW! A REPLY CAN BE MISREAD SO EASILY ON A THREAD .. SO WHATS WRONG WITH MANNERS .. ARE THEY GONE .. I SEE SO MANY POLITE LOVELY PEOPLE ON HERE AND I DO NOTICE ON OCCASSION WHAT US " AUSSIES" WOULD CALL CATTINESS .. CLAWS OUT ! WHY?
ITS NOT WHOSE RIGHT OR WRONG...

WHO IS REALLY GRACIOUS ? WHO IS REALLY HUMBLE? WHO THINKS THEY ARE MORE IMPORTANT? AND WHO THINKS SIMPLE MANNERS ARE BENEATH THEM????..OR SIMPLY NOT NEEDED?

HEY I LIKE MANNERS ..
HANDS UP WHO LIKES THEM :hug: ?????????????????

AM I OLD FASHION... LOL
:hug3:
SHARE THE LOVE.. ITS NOT WHAT GOES IN THE MOUTH THAT COUNTS IN WHAT COMES OUT! THATS THE REALITY OF THE POWER OF WORDS .

ARE YOU A WING BUILDER .. OR DO YOU CHOP THEM OFF :D

Uhmar
05-03-2011, 02:38 PM
It is not just on forums it is everywhere. Here is an article I wrote a few years ago about my witnessing this lack of manners as I age.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MANNERS

Is it just me or has anyone else that is over forty years of age noticed that the next two generations of children being raised seem to be lacking in the manner department?

It is and has always been one of my biggest pet peeves when people,not just children don't say please and thank you and excuse me. My paren'ts would have spanked my rear end and set me on fire. Have mannners simply flown away into the wind? Have we baby boomers raised a generation of children who don't even know what manners are, must less that they do exist. So they in turn are not teaching them to the generation coming in after them.

Could this explain some of the anger that floats in the air. Because thank you and your welcome seem to come from ones heart. And any heart energy sent forth into the atmospehere would seem to me to be positive in nature. And a lack of this would most definately have to be fueling negative energy into our beautiful world.

Years ago when my youngest son was six or seven years old, that's almost 20 years ago.We had went for a day on a lovely secluded beach cove when all of a sudden a fortyish male came up the beach with my son by the sleeve. Aghast and a little frightened this caused me to be as my motherly mind instantly thought what has he done. As they drew near the man repeated these words. He said, "Who are the parents of this young man?". I stepped forward and said "I claim responibility and what has he done?" This big burly hunk of a man simply smiled at me as he said. "I just wanted to meet the person who was resposible for raising this child. He did something a few minutes ago that I thought I'd never live long enough to ever witness again." As nervous now as I can be I looked him square in the eye and asked " oh my! what did he do?" This big burly man said as loud as can be. "This young man stepped in front of me then looked into my eyes and said EXCUSE ME." Well I had to meet the person who was still teaching such things, were the rest of his words to me. He patted my son on the back and left me trembling to my knees. I to this day have never forgotten that scene nor the pride I felt of my son on that day.

Then a few years ago while out dining with a friend I had a another experience I can't seem to forget. His son and grandaughter joined us to eat. And this five year old girl was almost rude to the waitress as we ate. She never once said please or thank you just demanded her food and extra tea. My meal was being ruined because the old stoggie in me kept mentally thinking she needs to say please. So she finally got on more than this Highly Sensitives nerves could stand and next thing I knew it was bubbling out. I ask her father was he not teaching her manners. He quickly spoke up and said to me, " I don't use them so why should she?"

I quickly felt as though I had been put back in my place, and in many ways I should have been, yet I felt no disgrace. Nor did I absorb this negative energy as I felt no blame at all as far as I was concerned it fell directly into the lap of the grandfather of this child. He did not teach these manners to his child so his child is not teaching them to his. It goes definately flows straight to grandpas's lap.

That is two generations worth of manners lost to the wind. Maybe they are still floating around like the wind. Of course their are exceptions to everything and for all the great parents who are teaching manners to your kids I am ducking all the things you are throwing at me about now. And I applaud you heartily.

I think what I will do is maybe later this day. I will put MANNERS up for sale on EBAY. Isn't that where antiques and gently used no longer wanted item's go? The ad I will run something along these lines.

Today I offer up for sale some old antiquated, very fine, gently used words. The more you bid the more you will aquire. We will start the bidding with the word please, and as the bids go higher we'll add more to the pile. Like thank you and your welcome, excuse me, yes maam, no maam, yes sir,and no sir. And if the bidding gets high enough I also have to offer, some very special incentives to toss on the pile. I will throw in this ringer of....Say hell-o when you enter a room, and do not eat with your mouth full please......And oh yes......Let the lady have the seat. The main top it all of will just thave to be.....Do not interrupt when someone is speaking.

So place your bids fast and furiously,Because these manners should probably go pretty cheap. I would hate for these words to expire. So get your bids in be the first buyer.

P>S : Oh yes I will ship for free!

uhmar

Roselove
05-03-2011, 05:01 PM
Raises hand lol

I think people who are genuinly open minded and looking to understand will engage in debate respectfully, stick to the issue and objective facts sometimes things get heated and it gets personal. Then there are the others who have know it all, i'm more evolved than you superiority complexes, judgemental attitudes etc that aren't looking to engage in healthy debate/discussion. It's ironic i rarely encounter people like this in real life, but have seen a number of them this forum, a spirtual forum nonetheless.

MYFIGO
05-03-2011, 06:35 PM
I love manners too... and I'm sure over the years I've slipped up more than a time or too.

One of the best lessons I ever learned was in the regard of using profanity. I had the good fortune to have a neighbor who did not use profanity. He never winced when I did though. It made such an impression on me.

My having grown up with 5 brothers and then being married to a police officer gave me plenty of years of having it deeply ingrained in my subconscious. It occurred to me though if his lack of profanity made such an impression on me, then it would on others too. I made it my goal to not use it. Changing this behavior was not easy, but I did it. And it does indeed make an impact on people. If you think profanity gets the attention of people, you should try NOT using it!

But the most important lesson for me was the fact that this man never made me feel criticized. His loving acceptance helped me to learn another lesson. Since then, I try to influence others with my kindness and love and the way I treat them rather than being critical and judging others when they are different than me.

iolite
05-03-2011, 08:08 PM
OH, I want to print this thread out for my daughter to read!!! I've been teaching her manners since she was a young child. "What's the magic word?" "Don't forget to say thank-you".... When she reached the difficult age of tween, she felt manners were unnecessary. We continued to insist she keep using them with us. When she'd explode with frustration, I'd simply tell her again (for the umpteenth time) that well-mannered people were welcome everywhere and welcomed back. Manners opened doors and took you places.

Enya
05-03-2011, 08:34 PM
Manners and politeness cost you nothing... but may bring you riches in the form of respect, good feelings and being able to hold your head up in company. :smile:

blackraven
06-03-2011, 01:56 AM
I find it offensive when I give a monetary gift to a young person and there is no "thank you" afterwards. I gave a $100.00 to a young woman who graduated from college. I never received a "thank you" card or a telephone call. Then last spring I bought a $360.00 wedding gift and received no "thank you" card in the mail. Then last summer I gave my niece my car when I bought a new one. Her mother thanked me, but I received no "thank you" card from my niece. So I agree with Uhmar that people these days (young people perhaps) haven't been taught the proper manners. It's just been my experience. I would never let my son get by without sending a "thank you" card out for even a card sent to him. He's grown now and it's imbedded in him. I hope he raises his children with the same mannerism.

Blackraven

pre-dawn
06-03-2011, 05:47 AM
THE POWER OF WORDS .. WOW! A REPLY CAN BE MISREAD SO EASILY ON A THREAD .. SO WHATS WRONG WITH MANNERS .. ARE THEY GONE Talking of manners, there is something called Netiquette which considers the use, and especially the overuse, of CAPITALS as shouting.
It is uncool to shout. It also makes it more difficult to read.
Maybe you don't know that. OTOH we may have a case of the the pot calling the kettle black? :smile:

nightowl
06-03-2011, 06:03 AM
Thank you Smiler for starting this thread. Manners yes! :D I will always vote for building wings.

nightowl

ces
06-03-2011, 08:38 AM
Great thread :D.

Manners seem to be out of fashion almost. I was raised to say please and thank you (and mean it). I still do it. If I receive a gift or something special I always write a thank you card and send it. I do notice that with modern technology there seems to be more "thank you's" by text or email. Which I guess is fine, but not quite the same.

Meeting a lot of new people every day I am always courteous - always treat them with respect. It helps to make difficult situation's go more smoothly, shows compassion and care.

Its sad that it is somethign that has changed over the years - progress?

Like your article Uhmar *thumbs up*

Smiler
06-03-2011, 11:03 AM
To all I am reading your thoughts ..delightful wonderful people .. warms the cockles of my heart ... when they say" let the sun shine in".. its you guys :)

Pre Dawn

Opphs sorry simply used capitals because I did not have my reading glasses on LOL
Sorry and thankyou for pointing that out!
lol and I have an electric jug :)
all the best to you

:)
:)

Smiler
06-03-2011, 11:17 AM
Still reading the beautiful positive energy of all the loving Polite people .
Its great :)

Will respond soon in a proper manner .. its been a big day for me ( an its getting late time wise in OZ.. I am tired sorry ) ..your words ..past posts .. storys and the high vibrations you reflect in language is delightful .

Thankyou XX

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww

clovelly
06-03-2011, 12:50 PM
Hehe, just reading this thread reminded me of of couple of things:

About 10 years ago I spent time in Nepal and developed friendships with some of the locals. I remember feeling agitated because I found them demanding & rude for always saying "Give me this", "Do that." There was never a please or thank you. When I mentioned this, they responded by saying they are fed up with the English always saying "Can I PLEASE..." and "THANK YOU". They just wished we would quickly get to the point of what we wanted.

Now I have a business that employs young staff, and I found this generation to be insensitive, arrogant, abrupt & rude to customers. When I asked them not to behave like this, they couldn't understand what they were doing wrong. Then it dawned on me that most of their communication is through the internet where nothing is face to face, & everything is iconic, shorthand & immediate. They have little experience & understanding of body language, voice tones & etiquette, so it feels like most of them have Aspergers. It has been quite a task teaching each of my staff how to relate to people face to face, something we used to learn as young children.

Uhmar
06-03-2011, 01:13 PM
!!!!!!!!!! APPLAUSE APPLAUSE APPLAUSE !!!!!!!!!!!!
AND "YES" i was screaming it

the one about thank you notes sent me over the moon also...no one does it anymore. I see stars over it as well...... to write a note..omg your lucky if they even say thank you.

I run into this with FREE readings also.... some dont even acknowledge you spent an hour or more of your time reading for them or if they do they say short curt answers.How does one grow from that. How does one see how they misinterpreted something by that. It is why readers have just about quit doing them free anymore..

peteyzen
06-03-2011, 02:41 PM
Oh I love manners, yep in agreement with you on the thank you cards thing. also if we want to expand as spiritual beings, how can we if we dont learn the basics. I rmeber being out mannerd one evening when we went for a meal with a freind and his wife. Every time the ladies left the table and as they returned, he stood up, as a show of respect to them, I learned something that night and try to do it myself now. But its usually the more simple please and thank yous that show we have been brought up right (as my parents used to say).

SerquetAsa
06-03-2011, 02:50 PM
I am 22 years of age.
I have an amazing grasp of and on the English language, as well as French.

I say please and thank you, I say May I, instead of Can I.

I hold doors open for people, regardless of where I am or how busy I may be.

People tell me that I am old fashioned, that no one even respects the little things I do, or say, but I believe differently.

Every person I invite into my life, I teach about manners and the power of speaking properly; behaving in a manner that has people believing you are a strong, nice person, without being brash or heinous.

I am from the land of the nicest people on earth, (or so we're viewed as such), Canada, and I still receive looks when I'm nice, when I smile, or when I say simple things like Thank you.

Manners are everything, and there aren't many people who even consider them.

So don't worry - you're not the only person who notices a lack of manners, or the lack of overall friendliness, regardless of where it's taking place.

clovelly
06-03-2011, 03:32 PM
I am 22 years of age.
I have an amazing grasp of and on the English language, as well as French.

I say please and thank you, I say May I, instead of Can I.

I hold doors open for people, regardless of where I am or how busy I may be.

People tell me that I am old fashioned, that no one even respects the little things I do, or say, but I believe differently.

Every person I invite into my life, I teach about manners and the power of speaking properly; behaving in a manner that has people believing you are a strong, nice person, without being brash or heinous.

I am from the land of the nicest people on earth, (or so we're viewed as such), Canada, and I still receive looks when I'm nice, when I smile, or when I say simple things like Thank you.

Manners are everything, and there aren't many people who even consider them.

So don't worry - you're not the only person who notices a lack of manners, or the lack of overall friendliness, regardless of where it's taking place.

SerquetAsa, so beautiful to hear, I'm sure your bringing light to many faces. xxx

SerquetAsa
06-03-2011, 03:36 PM
SerquetAsa, so beautiful to hear, I'm sure your bringing light to many faces. xxx

Thank you so much.
I can only hope I am bringing light to peoples' lives and faces :)
It's all from doing what I've been brought up with.
It's how everyone should be acting, it's what everyone should be doing.

It's hardly difficult or something you have to grit your teeth through, it's so simple.

Soul Searching
06-03-2011, 11:41 PM
Great thread !! :D

There is nothing at all wrong with having good manners. They do, in this modern and fast paced world, seem to be less and less important to a lot of people though ...... great shame in my book.

Saying please and thank you ...... wishing a stranger hello and a good day as you pass ....... holding open a door for someone ....... much nicer than a free for all - dog eat dog - I'm coming through attitude.

Busy Building Wings here !! ............ :hug3:

Smiler
08-03-2011, 06:44 AM
Uhmar

I absolutely loved your articule.... and your humor LOL

Quote; I think what I will do is maybe later this day. I will put MANNERS up for sale on EBAY. Isn't that where antiques and gently used no longer wanted item's go? The ad I will run something along these lines.

Today I offer up for sale some old antiquated, very fine, gently used words. The more you bid the more you will aquire. We will start the bidding with the word please, and as the bids go higher we'll add more to the pile. Like thank you and your welcome, excuse me, yes maam, no maam, yes sir,and no sir. And if the bidding gets high enough I also have to offer, some very special incentives to toss on the pile. I will throw in this ringer of....Say hell-o when you enter a room, and do not eat with your mouth full please......And oh yes......Let the lady have the seat. The main top it all of will just thave to be.....Do not interrupt when someone is speaking.

So place your bids fast and furiously,Because these manners should probably go pretty cheap. I would hate for these words to expire. So get your bids in be the first buyer.

P>S : Oh yes I will ship for free!

Love it thanks so much for a great read
:)

Rosewater .. I have my hands up too ..Wing builder :) .. maybe the verbal debate on the net is less polite as there is no face to face contact ???? what do you think :)?

MYFIGO
quote:One of the best lessons I ever learned was in the regard of using profanity. I had the good fortune to have a neighbor who did not use profanity. He never winced when I did though. It made such an impression on me.

I totally agree .. its lovely to sit and have a talk with a person who does not use profanity.. Its light and refreshing ..
:)

iolite..I taught my children manners :) and I am proud they use them .. manners does opens doors and takes you places ..maybe it opens hearts too ay :) .

Smiler
08-03-2011, 06:54 AM
ENYA

Beautifully said Quote :
Manners and politeness cost you nothing... but may bring you riches in the form of respect, good feelings and being able to hold your head up in company. :smile:

Might say that to next bad mannered person if you dont mind? :)

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:02 AM
blackraven ..sadly I have noticed this with some people and not only the young..

quote: I find it offensive when I give a monetary gift to a young person and there is no "thank you" afterwards...

There is almost a sense of expectation from some people.. I find it rude as well..
I shopped for a lot of balinese and sent things over to bali a few times .. once for a pregant mum to be.. due to receivving news of baby and christmas wishes from them .. the parcel took ages to get together and not a word.. only heard next time when they wanted more :(
Manners are lovely no matter where you are in the world if some-one put their time and thought into a person ..how hard is a THANKYOU ....
I am more careful these days ..!
I probadly am old fashioned but I dont like the gift registry thing for weddings either stating where a person must shop ..its always somewhere very expensive. Often no reply these days *sigh* Oh well least us guys Love manners :)
Thankyou for your post
:)

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:08 AM
Nightowl

You have gorgeous manners :D
Yes you certainly are a wing builder :D

*HUGS*
:)

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:14 AM
Ces

Quote Meeting a lot of new people every day I am always courteous - always treat them with respect. It helps to make difficult situation's go more smoothly, shows compassion and care.

Its sad that it is somethign that has changed over the years - progress?

I agree .. it is like a one articule thankyou in the newspaper .. progress? or finances maybe?.. or just plain lazy ???? Guess we wont know .
Thankyou
:)

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:17 AM
Clovelly

how very interesting lol .. thanks for that :)

Quote : About 10 years ago I spent time in Nepal and developed friendships with some of the locals. I remember feeling agitated because I found them demanding & rude for always saying "Give me this", "Do that." There was never a please or thank you. When I mentioned this, they responded by saying they are fed up with the English always saying "Can I PLEASE..." and "THANK YOU". They just wished we would quickly get to the point of what we wanted.

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:23 AM
Petezen .. I keep my nice cards .. lol.. in a box .. lol ...I LOVE THEM :)
When doing counselling years ago ..our group had to write a nice note to each and every stranger in the room ..there was about 25 of us .. I still have my notes . I know each of us really had to think about each person as an individual it was great :)... lol and handwritten :)

Smiler
08-03-2011, 07:31 AM
SerquertAsa & Cloverlly

I say to you

*WONDERFUL ***** politely exploding in a grin :)

And Soul Searching
Everyone just has to love you !!! :D

Quote: There is nothing at all wrong with having good manners. They do, in this modern and fast paced world, seem to be less and less important to a lot of people though ...... great shame in my book.

Saying please and thank you ...... wishing a stranger hello and a good day as you pass ....... holding open a door for someone ....... much nicer than a free for all - dog eat dog - I'm coming through attitude.

Busy Building Wings here !! ............ :hug3:( hee hee hee Good on you :hug3:
I can hear your wings flapping way!!!! )

:)

Soul Searching
08-03-2011, 10:04 PM
Very nice of you to say Smiler !! :D ...... Thanks very much !! :hug3: flap :hug3: flap :hug3: flap .......

7luminaries
08-03-2011, 10:08 PM
Hehe, just reading this thread reminded me of of couple of things:

About 10 years ago I spent time in Nepal and developed friendships with some of the locals. I remember feeling agitated because I found them demanding & rude for always saying "Give me this", "Do that." There was never a please or thank you. When I mentioned this, they responded by saying they are fed up with the English always saying "Can I PLEASE..." and "THANK YOU". They just wished we would quickly get to the point of what we wanted.

Now I have a business that employs young staff, and I found this generation to be insensitive, arrogant, abrupt & rude to customers. When I asked them not to behave like this, they couldn't understand what they were doing wrong. Then it dawned on me that most of their communication is through the internet where nothing is face to face, & everything is iconic, shorthand & immediate. They have little experience & understanding of body language, voice tones & etiquette, so it feels like most of them have Aspergers. It has been quite a task teaching each of my staff how to relate to people face to face, something we used to learn as young children.

1st just want to say, really nice thread ... agreed it's the personal touch, and the the thoughfulness, that's always what we remember most....manners do count, and words do hurt us, often lingering far longer than any marks from sticks or stones.

2nd I find the cultural gaps...and the aspergers of the under 18s or w/e...to be hilarious...but rather shocking, LOL!!! Kudos to you for teaching to young adults what they should have learned by age 3 or 5 at the latest, srsly...omg...

As for Nepal, how odd...LOL...I wonder do they feel we are insincere? Really as you say, for us, social interaction seems very harsh if we have to do away with these...a bit like jostling for position in the queue...many of us would rather just not go there and queueing be damned then if we can't be decent toward one another.

I am usually fairly direct (by western standards, LOL!)...but never without the courtesies...really, it's all about showiing your appreciation and gratitude isn't it?
and thank you all for your contributions here :hug3:

Love & light to all :smile:
7L

iolite
09-03-2011, 01:52 AM
My husband has a habit of saying "Would you do me a favor please?" and I have to respond to that before I actually find out what he wants me to do. It drives me CRAZY? I wish he'd just straight up ask!!

Smiler
09-03-2011, 02:38 PM
iolite

oh I hate that .. rather know what it is first lol

like may I ask you something please?.. its okay to say no!! lol

Then I dont feel I have too

and if I do a thanks is great !

:)

truthseeker57
26-03-2011, 02:17 AM
:hug3:

HUGS TO ALL.. IF WE HAVE HAD THIS THREAD BEFORE " SORRY" ..WE DO HAVE A LOT ON HERE.

THE POWER OF WORDS .. WOW! A REPLY CAN BE MISREAD SO EASILY ON A THREAD .. SO WHATS WRONG WITH MANNERS .. ARE THEY GONE .. I SEE SO MANY POLITE LOVELY PEOPLE ON HERE AND I DO NOTICE ON OCCASION WHAT US " AUSSIES" WOULD CALL CATTINESS .. CLAWS OUT ! WHY?
ITS NOT WHOSE RIGHT OR WRONG...

WHO IS REALLY GRACIOUS ? WHO IS REALLY HUMBLE? WHO THINKS THEY ARE MORE IMPORTANT? AND WHO THINKS SIMPLE MANNERS ARE BENEATH THEM????..OR SIMPLY NOT NEEDED?

HEY I LIKE MANNERS ..
HANDS UP WHO LIKES THEM :hug: ?????????????????

AM I OLD FASHION... LOL
:hug3:
SHARE THE LOVE.. ITS NOT WHAT GOES IN THE MOUTH THAT COUNTS IN WHAT COMES OUT! THATS THE REALITY OF THE POWER OF WORDS .

ARE YOU A WING BUILDER .. OR DO YOU CHOP THEM OFF :D


Thank you Smiler for a beautiful post on the Power of Words. As a writer, I spend much time searching for the absolute word to describe a situation. I am saddened by the general state of affairs when it comes to speaking. The damage that can be propelled is often shattering and irreversible. Rudeness seems to prevail. You ask WHO IS REALLY GRACIOUS ? WHO IS REALLY HUMBLE? WHO THINKS THEY ARE MORE IMPORTANT? AND WHO THINKS SIMPLE MANNERS ARE BENEATH THEM????..OR SIMPLY NOT NEEDED?

Those who are truly gracious and humble will never speak those words. They will be kind, generous, loving and grateful. The other group sadly falls under rudeness -- either lacking the ability to be or even worse possessing a cold soul.

This is an extremely potent subject especially for forums. I am dismayed when I see words that are cruel, cold, and mean. I believe it is our responsibility as human souls to support and guide fellow travelers that are new and share their innermost thoughts. I have seen new posters quickly leave after receiving misdirected and harsh words.

Nothing can be as moving as a kind word, thought or gesture. So glad for the soulful thoughts.

I share in being a wing builder.

grateful always,
truthseeker57
:angel5:

Silver
26-03-2011, 04:52 AM
I can understand and appreciate Nepal people and iolite's view on 'manners' and I believe I would adapt well in a country or community where things are more rush-rush and skip the niceties, I can go either way, lol. I think I recall people referring to New Yorkers as brusque, but I grew up in northcentral PA and I think that may be something, an attitude that hey we're all busy family members, working, going to school, do we really have time for the curtseys etc., but tongue in cheek and "cheeky" but really, I think some cultures and so on believe we all are level-headed and well intentioned and decent even if we forget a few thank yous, etc., etc. Let's just get on with the show <grin>

Ciqala
26-03-2011, 10:23 AM
I'm not sure why most people do not have manners, but I can certainly dissect myself for you all, hehe.

I enjoy manners, and caring exchanges, they are beautiful. But sometimes they are too much for me to take in, I am very sensitive. Inside, I am very caring, almost too caring at times, and I am exceptionally kind, and i try my best to express those things, but sometimes the words get stuck, ya know what i mean?

I often begin feeling this awkwardness. I just never know what to say, or how to say what i feel to people, i always think i'm going to say the wrong thing, i over analyze what i say sometimes, it's very hard for me to express what is in my heart, because most times those feelings are indescribable through english.
Whenever i do end up saying something without putting a leash on myself (like now) it turns out to be the most obscene and horrendous and embarrassing thing i could have said.
I often try to give very heart warming advice, even on here, and i feel like i fail greatly in doing so.
At times there just is no correct word to describe how grateful i am to people. And the word thankyou, and i am grateful, becomes so cliched. There have been many embarrassing times to admit, even on here, where it takes me a really long time to reply to someones post, because i am at a complete loss for words for their amazing advice. I then get into a cycle of really wanting to say something which would end up sounding either really corny, weird, so i end up just saying something more formal.
This happens in real life, where i just can't find the words to say how i truly feel.

I know in real life, that i can come off as threatening to people, some of my friends have told me that. On the inside i am not - i am just terrified of making a mistake and i care about that person so much, but on the outside it comes off like i am pushing them away. There have been countless times i try to become close to someone, but i end up coming off as a jerk. At least that's how i feel what goes down.
So i know in my case, my lack of manners stems from my worry about saying something wrong, so then i end up doing something wrong in the end.

I'm not sure where this all stemmed from for me. But i know i have always loved so compassionately, to the point i become kind of afraid of social interactions, and at times i feel better detached from it all because of that fear. I know i used to think i was just saving people from myself. But in real life i have a very charismatic aura, and attract people to me. Perhaps i am afraid of being hurt.

Silver
26-03-2011, 10:30 AM
Believe it or not, ciqala, I think I do know where you're coming from and believe I may suffer from perhaps a milder form, lol. There are so many different people with different outlooks and attitudes, I think I get tongue tied or afraid I'll say the wrong thing or say too much or too little, so can feel like a deer in the headlights. Awkward social moments, I've definitely known a few~*

NightSpirit
26-03-2011, 10:47 AM
:hug3:

HUGS TO ALL.. IF WE HAVE HAD THIS THREAD BEFORE " SORRY" ..WE DO HAVE A LOT ON HERE.

THE POWER OF WORDS .. WOW! A REPLY CAN BE MISREAD SO EASILY ON A THREAD .. SO WHATS WRONG WITH MANNERS .. ARE THEY GONE .. I SEE SO MANY POLITE LOVELY PEOPLE ON HERE AND I DO NOTICE ON OCCASSION WHAT US " AUSSIES" WOULD CALL CATTINESS .. CLAWS OUT ! WHY?
ITS NOT WHOSE RIGHT OR WRONG...

WHO IS REALLY GRACIOUS ? WHO IS REALLY HUMBLE? WHO THINKS THEY ARE MORE IMPORTANT? AND WHO THINKS SIMPLE MANNERS ARE BENEATH THEM????..OR SIMPLY NOT NEEDED?

HEY I LIKE MANNERS ..
HANDS UP WHO LIKES THEM :hug: ?????????????????

AM I OLD FASHION... LOL
:hug3:
SHARE THE LOVE.. ITS NOT WHAT GOES IN THE MOUTH THAT COUNTS IN WHAT COMES OUT! THATS THE REALITY OF THE POWER OF WORDS .

ARE YOU A WING BUILDER .. OR DO YOU CHOP THEM OFF :D

May I?

I see two sides to this. Sometimes also, people can read something and take it personally and over-react to another's innocent comments and say so.
People, in here and outside of, don't always resonate with some and that's okay. Some haven't yet learnt its not always aimed at them...if its obvious, then fine...manners would be a good thing.
I've probably just repeated the same thing as someone else here as i haven't read them. Sorry if i have.

Smiler
26-03-2011, 10:54 AM
Night from one Aussie to another .. you are cool sister ! *hug*

Your intent shows always that you care .

Hugs mate

:)

NightSpirit
26-03-2011, 11:11 AM
hehehe *~*HUGS*~*