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View Full Version : Feeling lost and confused...


kaiersai
01-03-2011, 11:36 AM
Hi there, I am new here and I just wanted somewhere, anywhere, to share my story and have outside reflections and insights.

About two years ago I was in an accident and two girls in my car did not make it. One of them being my closest friend. Before the accident I was pretty much closed off spiritually (having discussed with mentioned friend how we believe when you die thats it)

But obviously this has changed. I saw a medium a few months afterwards, but havent since, and instead of waiting for messages I found myself instead asking questions about how he can do the things he says, and why cant I etc etc..... He told me that if I opened up Spiritually everything would change, which I have been thinking about every single day.

Strange things happen all the time, driving around at night nearly always Street lights im driving past will either turn off, or turn on. I know this might just be coincidence but after it happening for over a year now, conciouslly looking out for it and it still happening Im pretty convinced I cant be THAT lucky. Day dreaming and feeling sad then feeling a "hug" like presence and immediately feeling better. Having dreams that are just dreams and having her "walk-in" and having the dream fade into blackness leaving her standing alone, with me. The feeling of her presence when certain songs come on accompanied with extreme happiness. ALWAYS bumps and noises around the house at night. (Although weird things around my house have always been happening, kettle turning on, radio turning on, lights, glasses shattering in cupboards)

Since then the thoughts in my mind are always on the go, Spirits and Ghosts work on energy levels right? They can intefere with techonology, which works off electricity, and so do our brains. So, if thinking about something, asking questions in my head, and suddenly having what seems like perfectly reasonable answers "pop" into my head, could this be my Guide? I have no "sense" of it being nothing more then my own mind. I guess the question here is where do you define the power of ur mind and that of external powers? Could Every single person actually be living their "life plan" unconciously by having the choices they ponder influenced in said way? How would you know if you are making up your own mind or having it made up for you. And again when feeling comforted or feeling a presence that sends goose bumps up and down my back... I guess it comes down to me standing on the brink of full belief or not. I have had the feeling of needing to go see another medium for awhile now.

Ivy
01-03-2011, 01:03 PM
Kaerirsais...I feel youre in the right place. Full belief isn't necessarily better because all sorts of mistakes can be made. But if you can enjoy the hugs and the beauty of feeling all that you do....and if can listen to those inner messages without the need to prove where they have come from, then you are living in spirit with yourself and those questions, or the contemplation of them, will take you on to live your life as a spiritual journey.
I hope you will stick with it, and not let the insecurities (or doubts) lead you into relying on others beliefs to tell you whats what, just trust you x

kaiersai
01-03-2011, 07:16 PM
Thank you heather. Thats pretty much all I needed to hear =)