Having all the answers doesn't ease the pain

[shivatar]

Just a thought to those who are desperately seeking answers for questions that can never be answered.

[FallingLeaves]

actually
if you seek with a broken heart
you might find
the answer
that says
'just stop'

[linen53]

Understanding why you are going through tough times does not remove the pain of the experience.

[FallingLeaves]

Understanding why you are going through tough times does not remove the pain of the experience.

No you don't stop the pain (maybe you can't) but you don't HAVE to make it worse than it is. Someone like me needs to examine what I am doing and why before I can accept that it is 'safe' to jsut stop contributing to my own pain.

[n2mec]

Difficult to comment, what type of pain, physical, emotional, financial, most cases you don't need all the answers just the one.

[naturesflow]

Just a thought to those who are desperately seeking answers for questions that can never be answered.


No answers can lead to more questions which becomes part of it all..

[Really!]

Understanding why you are going through tough times does not remove the pain of the experience.

True for me, also, with a variety of different experiences ...
I understood, to the depth of my soul, my husband was dead to the point of several times being on the brink of a psychotic break ...
As incredible as it sounds, grief does not allow the full impact of a loved one's death at once, it is released gradually over time (years) ...


FallingLeaves,
Many people don't know they're contributing to their own pain even when they understand their problem ...

[Starman]

First off no one has all of the answers, secondly having answers will not ease pain but applying what you have learned,
using techniques like meditation, etc. definitely eases my pain. There are lots of things which we can do to ease our
pain and sometimes the answer is just crying about it, which may, or may not, make some people feel better.:smile:

[vespa68]

You would not have all the answers to everything until you understood yourself completely and that would mean you have detached from your emotions completely.

[naturesflow]

I guess we would call that clarity of being Vespa.

Not that you would have all answers for life matters, but certainly that clarity allows you to function more clear either not knowing the answer or knowing. The self wouldn't need to establish a "need to know" simply because it is content to live with the mystery (the unknown) and accepting of oneself in that.

I think when one is aware that they are who and what they are and that is a changing state of awareness from within, then naturally there is a deeper acceptance of you and life as one, knowing that things change and shift as we deepen and build a life full of lots of experiences and creations, that we do have some measure of control over some aspects. We can "once aware" lead ourselves aware of that piece, as a changing shifting perspective and a piece that can ground us deeper in self and get on with life. All the while knowing, that the unknown can bring to us anything, but how we face it and feel is what we can control once aware we have choice in this way.

[Jeremy Bong]

Understanding why you are going through tough times does not remove the pain of the experience.

Easy to response turn to no way to response that's the pain. The remote, the rewilder, wilderness.... get lost......where's the right answers to the question? I don't know.... let it be...

[Baile]

First off no one has all of the answersBut... one can have all the answers to those questions they need answered, in order to experience joy and contentment in their life. It's really a matter of being satisfied with what one does know, and leaving it at that. I do not want what I have not got as Sinéad would say.

[Lorelyen]

As said, there are no answers for some questions. So it might have better been framed as we have all the questions but few answers; and as Naturesflow says the lack of an answer may expand the questioning. It allows us exploration at least. We can learn the maze, suss the blind alleys. We might find nothing useful but at least we've walked the paths. We can often find answers that suit ourselves but with no means to verify.

Seems human nature that explanations are often sought because humans are too creative just to harmonise with Nature so they seek purpose. They can't just be. It's probably because we're spirit doing a stint here and can't discover why. Spiritual refinement doesn't seem much of a purpose in the mundane world for most people.

So....what is the pain that's the subject of the topic?
Humans aren't capable of Utopia in the physical world. Is the pain the discrepancy between a desired, imagined or actually glimpsed state and the facts of material life? Is it that of failure to achieve something here? The loss of something? The rate of progress?

...

[shivatar]

As said, there are no answers for some questions. So it might have better been framed as we have all the questions but few answers; and as Naturesflow says the lack of an answer may expand the questioning. It allows us exploration at least. We can learn the maze, suss the blind alleys. We might find nothing useful but at least we've walked the paths. We can often find answers that suit ourselves but with no means to verify.

Seems human nature that explanations are often sought because humans are too creative just to harmonise with Nature so they seek purpose. They can't just be. It's probably because we're spirit doing a stint here and can't discover why. Spiritual refinement doesn't seem much of a purpose in the mundane world for most people.

So....what is the pain that's the subject of the topic?
Humans aren't capable of Utopia in the physical world. Is the pain the discrepancy between a desired, imagined or actually glimpsed state and the facts of material life? Is it that of failure to achieve something here? The loss of something? The rate of progress?

...

having the answer to a question does not necessarily ease the pain created by the question.

No question in specific, it's a blanket statement. I was thinking the "why am I here?" and the many answers we conjure for that question originally though.

[linen53]

No you don't stop the pain (maybe you can't) but you don't HAVE to make it worse than it is. Someone like me needs to examine what I am doing and why before I can accept that it is 'safe' to jsut stop contributing to my own pain.

I can agree to that. It's easy to fit into the pity party routine. At least, that's what comes to mind as an example.

[linen53]

Easy to response turn to no way to response that's the pain. The remote, the rewilder, wilderness.... get lost......where's the right answers to the question? I don't know.... let it be...

Yes, our emotions can get lost as we focus on the problem looming before us. Or should I say we can get lost in our emotions.

[lemex]

Actually it helps a lot and one can see a lot of illusion of pain. :smile: imo there is nothing wrong in seeking at all. We shouldn't say to another what they can and cannot do just because I cannot. In saying this you are wishing it, you are manifesting it. Here's the thing to remember, it for whatever the "reason" takes years of searching to a single question (asked) and no question is separate they are interwoven and connected and you never saw it. As we know, a person can live an entire way an entire life cycle. Imagine living forever.

[Jeremy Bong]

Yes, our emotions can get lost as we focus on the problem looming before us. Or should I say we can get lost in our emotions.

It seems to be the question is the answer and the answer is the question, I supposed. The same as the lost is the answer or the question is the lost by the emotions.

So just forget about it, too heavy the burden for nothing at all, so the time to let it go. The mind be calm or equanimity. Seeking for the right target for a fruitful result. Striving for the right goals with less efforts.

[linen53]

I always say "one day at a time".

[A human Being]

Just a thought to those who are desperately seeking answers for questions that can never be answered.
I'm curious - you say having all the answers doesn't ease the pain, but then you talk about questions that can never be answered... this seems like a contradiction.

For myself, it seems more important at the moment to ask the right questions, to call into question the assumptions and beliefs I have - about how I think life should be, about who I am, and about my purpose in life. I think it's these assumptions that are at the root of my suffering.

[shivatar]

It's not a contradiction because I wasn't answering the unanswerable question I put forth. I was making a generalization

[A human Being]

It's not a contradiction because I wasn't answering the unanswerable question I put forth. I was making a generalization
I'm still confused.

[Cmt12]

I feel like this thread is scratching the surface of a universal truth. How about this idea:

Philosophies, belief systems, and coping strategies that we use as reassurance are entirely worthless when we are in the midst of pain.

For instance, we may have a meditation or breathing practice that we have incorporated into our daily routine; or we may even have a well thought out and developed belief system that provides an explanation for the problem of suffering that satisfies us. These things may give us peace of mind to move forward with our lives, but when we are once again inevitably in the midst of pain, none of that stuff matters in that moment. All that matters is our desire to never feel that pain again, and so everything is under judgment - our tactics, our strategies, our beliefs, etc.

Now, that moment passes quickly as the pain begins to gradually subside, so does our courage to change. With enough faith, we can decide to voluntarily put ourselves back into the midst of the pain, where we can be stripped of our beliefs in order to see things with fresh eyes. It's one of those contradictions of life - pain is the problem but also the location where the solution is found.

This forum is full of ideas and beliefs that are held in high regard. However, the next time you find yourself in the middle of the chaos of pain, if you are able to be conscious, ask yourself what value are your beliefs to you now.

[A human Being]

I feel like this thread is scratching the surface of a universal truth. How about this idea:

Philosophies, belief systems, and coping strategies that we use as reassurance are entirely worthless when we are in the midst of pain.

For instance, we may have a meditation or breathing practice that we have incorporated into our daily routine; or we may even have a well thought out and developed belief system that provides an explanation for the problem of suffering that satisfies us. These things may give us peace of mind to move forward with our lives, but when we are once again inevitably in the midst of pain, none of that stuff matters in that moment. All that matters is our desire to never feel that pain again, and so everything is under judgment - our tactics, our strategies, our beliefs, etc.

Now, that moment passes quickly as the pain begins to gradually subside, so does our courage to change. With enough faith, we can decide to voluntarily put ourselves back into the midst of the pain, where we can be stripped of our beliefs in order to see things with fresh eyes. It's one of those contradictions of life - pain is the problem but also the location where the solution is found.

This forum is full of ideas and beliefs that are held in high regard. However, the next time you find yourself in the middle of the chaos of pain, if you are able to be conscious, ask yourself what value are your beliefs to you now.
Certainly, philosophies and beliefs go out the window when I'm in the midst of pain and suffering, but practices such as meditation and deep breathing do have value for me, because they help me to stay present with what I'm feeling, alleviate tension in the body, lessen the physical discomfort, and not get sucked into some mental drama or other (which is usually the reaction to the physical discomfort). I'm not saying it's easy, but it's far preferable to being completely overwhelmed by suffering.

[lemex]

Physical pain and non-physical pain use the same areas of the brains which is how they relate to each other, this is where having answers can help.

[Really!]

This is twofold in nature ...
Pain brings meaning - a lesson learned to never be forgotten - motivates people to find hope, skills/tools to cope w/the pain, power to overcome adversity ...
Secondly, answers provide a starting point to seek ways to resolve the issue (s) ...
If there is no answer to the issue - the pain, being the first part, can still be worked through & adjusted to make bearable ...
And you're right, pain is not eased from having the answers b/c pain is an internal hurricane w/a compass to lead you to acceptance of your answer (s) ...